Archive Page 177

29
Mar
08

I’m Still Not Going to Watch Golf But…

The LPGA has recently seen an influx of interest in their events; it seems that they are moving away from the butch lesbian era and into a more fan (read: man) friendly lipstick lesbian era. For example there is Natalie Gulbis with all her FHM “fame”…

But everyone knows her, and frankly, she doesn’t do it for me. Then there is Ms. Anna “Country Club Charlize Theron” Rawson who knows how to get the ball in the hole and she does not have that same problem.

(A whole heap more after the jump)
28
Mar
08

Links for the weekend

For the weekend here are a couple links that you definitely should read to take you into the weekend. I’m still trying to wrap my brain around the sheer volume of Hideki Matsui’s porn collection.

Sports Hernia Presents “Stuff Awkward White Centers Like”

This All-Robot Baseball Team from the Armchair GM is fucking hilarious.

First they came for the nipple rings, and I said nothing…

You’re never too old to have to pay for it

Awesome bath tub/aquarium

Secret East German Porno stash discovered, Hideki arranges plane tickets

Keenan and Friend Go to Good Burger

Man claims to speak “Australian” After Allegedly Being Raped by a Wombat

Have a good weekend!
28
Mar
08

The Roommate Speaks!

Our first guest blog entry comes today via epic commenter and fine human being “The Roomate”! Being a spelling prick, I made the headline to properly read roommate. Enjoy!

Well folks, another high school teacher was caught having sex with a student. This time is it was 25-year-old Heather Kennedy who teachers math at Wantagh HS in Long Island, NY, as reported by the New York Post.

Ms. Kennedy did it high-school style: in her car in the parking lot of another area HS, Massapequa High. After ‘parking’, the 16-year-old she was cruising with asked her if she wanted to have sex, and she agreed. I like how the 16-year-old covered his ass from a potential date-rape charge by asking his teacher if she wanted to statutorily rape him. Oh, laws!

Continue reading ‘The Roommate Speaks!’

28
Mar
08

Uh Hideki…? (UPDATED)

Sports Frog has this fun little tidbit on paper fetishist Hideki Matsui that frankly blew my brain.

“In 2003, the Asian edition of Time Magazine did a puff piece on Matsui as he was coming to America, and reported that:

(Matsui’s) only eccentricity, if it can be called that, is his extensive private library of adult videos. His refreshing ability to laugh self-deprecatingly about his porno collection, reporters say, is one reason why fans and even nonfans have taken to him so much.””

ARTNET.com also has a link to a sports illustrated report that says “Matsui has 55,000 distinct items in his porn collection.” (link NSFW)

55,000? That’s a whole lot of tentacles…

Definitely read the Sports Frog article, as it is pretty damn funny.

And for anyone who was confused by J. Temperance’s comment in the original post, this is the bet he was referring to.

“Mmmm, stupid baseball game, now I have to wait three hours to pound one out…”
28
Mar
08

Washington Solves All Problems That Matter!

bushasapitcher

Good news! President Bush who hates steroids so much–except when he owned the Texas Rangers and they employed Ivan Rodriguez, Juan Gonzalez and Jose Canseco–won’t have to deal with a totally awkward moment at Opening Day for the Nationals’ new stadium. Scheduled to throw out the first pitch, the nominal receiver of said pitch would be the catcher no? Well, who is supposed to be the starting catcher for the Washington Nationals? Could it be Paul Lo Duca? The same Paul Lo Duca who was mentioned so prominently in the Mitchell Report? The Paul Lo Duca who sent this lovely handwritten note to Kirk Radomski? I think it just might be.

27
Mar
08

Uh Hideki…?

hideki.jpg
Yankees outfielder Hideki Matsui annouced his marriage today at a press conference, his wife didn’t show up so he did the apparently next best thing, by drawing a picture and holding it up next to him. Supposedly his new wife is a 25 year old woman, but I think it is just as likely she is a graphic novel character. That honeymoon is going to be epic. I for one do not want to be vacationing anywhere near it…

From AM NY

27
Mar
08

“Barry Who? Never Heard of Him…”

The San Francisco Giants have purified their stadium and removed all images and remnants of Barry Bonds from the premises. Certainly now no one will ever associate the two together again.

As Barry slowly approaches trial for perjury it seems that the team wants no negative connotations to overwhelm what should be the worst or second worst team in all of baseball. It is not like, without Barry Bonds, that incredible stadium of theirs wouldn’t exist right? Or that the only reason that the team got any coverage in the last few years was because of Barry.

Continue reading ‘“Barry Who? Never Heard of Him…”’

27
Mar
08

I Can Do Tricks With My Balls Too…

Check out these ridiculous moves done by some kids in Mexico, even if you don’t like soccer, they’re pretty amazing.

How much do you have to trust your friend to do that kick off the head that is 45 seconds in?

You should see me with a Ping-Pong Paddle, I can totally bounce it for like 80 times in a row, so that’s similar…

27
Mar
08

Annual Rite of the MLB Season #42

Today, the San Diego Padres as expected placed Mark Prior on the 60-day DL while he rehabs from shoulder surgery. For Prior this is a return to a place he knows best, having been on the DL at some point every year since 2003 and hasn’t pitched a full season since Dusty Baker destroyed his career and future that same year.

I for one hope that he comes back. I’ve always like Prior because his curve ball is sick, his mechanics are flawless and because I drafted him in the first round of a fantasy draft like an idiot in 2004. Also, I drafted him this year in one of my fantasy leagues as my final pick, and think that, if he can be healthy, we could see maybe 8-11 wins and 130 Ks from June forward. Maybe.

Possibly.

Continue reading ‘Annual Rite of the MLB Season #42’

27
Mar
08

A-Rod Simply “Not Bright Enough”

In today’s NY Post there is an interview with former bullpen catcher Mike Borzello of the Yankees about Jose Canseco’s most recent steroid allegations against Alex Rodriguez. According to Borzello, who says that “nobody in the last four years, including his wife because she wasn’t on the road, spent more time with Alex than I did,” and that there is simply no way that A-Rod did any illegal performance enhancing drugs.

During the period that Canseco details Borzello didn’t know A-Rod but he claims that Rodriguez might have an occasional beer, but otherwise is “afraid of drugs and alcohol.” Therefore, to Borzello’s mind, there is simply no way that Canseco can be telling the truth.

“In four years I was with him 24 hours a day, and not one time did I ever hear, see or get wind of anything having to do with performance enhancing drugs, steroids, HGH, anything. No way, with as much as this guy trusted me, would he have kept that part of his life secret from me. He trusted me with everything, and I was with him every day all day long. It would have been impossible to show me everything behind the curtain except for this. He is not that bright to be able to pull that off.” [emphasis added]

Continue reading ‘A-Rod Simply “Not Bright Enough”’

27
Mar
08

We’re All Gonna Die!

Scientists have announced that a giant 1500 year old block of ice broke off from the Wilikens ice shelf in Antarctica. The block of ice–9 times the size of Manhattan–itself is no great danger to humans, but is a disturbing sign of things to come and portends to rises in the ocean levels that would cause massive disaster zones.

I’m trying to do my part and am going to start sharing rides in my whip from now on.

Carpool lane!
26
Mar
08

Who Went to Jail for YOUR Birthday?

Denver Nuggets (I love the Nugs!) star Carmelo Anthony has a one year old son named Kiyan, and for his birthday on March 7th, Carmelo arranged for his personal chef to make a special cake for the day. Unfortunately, Chef Daniel Paul Young ran a stop sign on his way to the party with the cake in his car. Even more unfortunate, Young was wanted for back payments on his child support, which meant that instead of just a ticket he was ticketed for jail. Ever the consummate professional, Young put aside the concerns for his own well-being and made one request for leniency, for the cake. Allowed to call someone, he arranged for a friend to come pick the cake up and help make little Kiyan Anthony’s birthday as memorable as it possibly can be for a 1 year old. Now that’s a dedicated employee!

kiyan-anthony
Carmelo and Kiyan Anthony
Chef Young



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