The Slanch Report

Toronto Blue Jay Jesse Carlson was never a pretty man, after last night he added a handsome welt to his grisly visage after upsetting Yankees catcher Jorge Posada. After coming around the bases, Posada threw an elbow into Carlson who was covering home plate in a move that home plate umpire Jim Joyce called “unsportsmanlike” and a “cheap shot.”

(video of the whole affair is HERE)

Previously the Yankees had hit Toronto’s Aaron Hill and so Carlson threw behind Posada as retaliation. Carlson didn’t hit him though and while both benches emptied in an empty gesture, there weren’t any ramifications beyond both teams being warned.

It was Posada who started the whole affair the second time by shoving of Carlson and that led to the full emptying of the benches and a full-on brawl. Of course, most of the players were just standing around on the outskirts afraid of being touched. It wouldn’t be a douchey brawl if Shelley Duncan didn’t get in the middle of it. Seriously, this dude doesn’t do anything on the field but always wants to fight SOMEONE. What the hell is his problem, take an anger management class or drink some herbal tea or something.

One player who apparently was eager to be touched was A-Rod, because, after all it wouldn’t be a big piling up of men without him throwing out a super gay-sounding quote: “It got pretty heavy and pretty thick pretty quickly.” Yowzers, you want some more dick with that quote?

[Big League Stew and ESPN]