Posts Tagged ‘Tampa Bay Rays


Nice Joke Smart Guy

jews-fake-bomb-threat-new-jerseyBefore Wednesday’s game with the Red Sox an employee of the Rays was arrested for planting a fake bomb in what he termed a “practical joke.” Funny. I get it!

William L. Jordan, a mechanic with the team built and hid the device as a goof according to the St. Petersburg police.

“His actions were in very poor taste and do not reflect the values of the organization,” Rays vice president Rick Vaughn wrote in an e-mail.

The “bomb” was a box taped to a shelf with wires sticking out and emitting a “beeping” sound. The police were called and, realizing the severity of the situation, admitted he had put it there and apologized.

Unfortunately, the bomb squad had already been called and arrived on the scene where they confirmed it was a fake. Jordan, who has worked for the team for 3 years may not have much longer in his tenure with the team.

“This will be handled internally,” Vaughn wrote regarding whether or not Jordan would lose his job.

I gotta say, if you can plant a FAKE BOMB at your workplace and NOT get fired, that’s a hell of a leniant employer.

I guess when you have such a history of failure as the Rays do it only makes sense…



Free Tickets in Exchange for Buttplay

Gorshinriddler_JPGAs a means to promote awareness and get more men screened for prostate cancer, the Tampa Bay Rays will hold free screenings Thursday at Tropicana Field before the game.

For participating in the test, men will receive 2 free tickets to a game during the team’s August 18-23 home-stand. Last year more than 400 men came and were checked out as part of the same event.

Starting at 7 am, the screenings will take place in the center field concourse, which is exactly where I would want a stranger’s finger to be inserted into my anus.

As important as prostate screens are, there HAS to be an easier/better way to get free tickets to a game…

[Tampa Bay Online]


The Devil Is in the Uniforms

At Saturday’s Rays game, they wore some retro uniforms, all the way back to the good ol’ days of 1998! Since dropping the “Devil” part of their name, the Rays have won 145 games over the last season and a half, add in the teams first winning season/playoff appearance/World Series appearance and it seems like dropping the Beelzebubian part of their name has worked.

In Saturday’s game manager Joe Maddon was ejected, the team’s 4-game win streak was halted, catcher Dioner Navarro was taken to the hospital after taking a foul ball off the side of his face and worst of all, SMASH MOUTH played a concert at the Tropicana after the game.

We just seem to play better in a Rays uniform,” said Joe Maddon. “That was not pretty.”

I wouldn’t expect to see the “retro” uniforms again any time soon.

Also, to be fair, I used to really like the Smash Mouth first album.

[The Ledger]


Lightning Crashes

tropToday’s game between the Tampa Bay Rays and Toronto Blue Jays was delayed for about 20 minutes when lightning struck the top of the Tropicana knocking out power to a bank of lights.

This is the second time it’s happened this season. They can’t get a new stadium fast enough, and the Trop is only 19 years old.



Beam Him Up a Strikeout

SP_303414_BORC_rays_2When current Tampa Bay Ray Joe Nelson was in college his coach suggested he convert from being a shortstop/third baseman to becoming a pitcher; success was slow to come at first, until Nelson developed an effective split-fingered type pitch, inspired by his love of Star Trek. Gripping the ball in a “Vulcan”-style, Nelson has finally found success at the big league level.

Uncomfortable with the traditional grip between his index and middle fingers, Nelson one day moved the ball to between his middle and ring fingers — “I just jammed it in there one day” — and it worked. He began throwing it regularly at the University of San Francisco and never stopped.

Then, of course, he had to decide what to call it. “Old enough” at 34 to have watched Star Trek TV show reruns (and, apparently, lots of other questionable shows) in addition to several of the movies, he figured that was the way to go.

“It was either going to be Nanu Nanu from Mork & Mindy, or the Vulcan,” Nelson said. “And Spock just seemed like a cooler character than Mork did.”

[Tampa Bay]


A Marshmellowy Doppelganger

As the Rays prepare for their first World Series win tonight, senior advisor Don Zimmer has been hanging around the team, throwing batting practice and just being a part of the scene, helping the players adjust to the momentous occasion. Having been a part of 6 World Champions already, Zim is anxious to get that 7th ring. In 1984 Dan Ackroyd and Harold Ramis changed the world forever with the movie Ghostbusters. I don’t think I’m revealing any spoilers by saying that at the end of the movie a giant Stay Puft Marshmellow Man attacks the city until the Ghostbusters are able to foil him and save the day. As ever, check out the rest of our doppelgangers here, and please vote in the poll below.



And Thus It Comes to an End

This loss hurts, but not as bad as 2003, or even 2005. Was I fully confident that the Sox would come back and win that game? Yes. One hundred percent yes, Today, I’m left with the AL champion Rays, from TAMPA, not one more Boston run to the championship. So it goes. When it came down to it, the Red Sox’ strength simply wasn’t there in this series. The pitching rotation carried this team, and in games 2-5 the rotation couldn’t keep up with the young power bats. When the Red Sox came to the postseason in years past, the middle of the batting order was fearsome, this year we were declawed. David ORTiz looked woeful and while Drew, Youk and Bay all were solid in the ALCS, none of them stepped up in the way that the Sox needed, like Lowell or Ramirez did last year. The Red Sox entered the ALCS with their number 3 hitter struggling, and without the #4 and 5 hitters from last year’s team, who combined last year for 18 RBIs. That loss of offense wasn’t replaced by the rest of the guys in the lineup.

Does that mean this season was a disappointment? Well, I’m disappointed but the Rays were the better team. They showed it during the season. They showed it in this series. That the Red Sox came back and made this a series after being down 3-1 and forcing a game 7 is testament to their team unity but it was clear that the Rays were better in all aspects besides the bullpen. When Andy Sonnastine is dealing you know that you’re season is probably going to be over. Continue reading ‘And Thus It Comes to an End’


Sarah Palin Goes Both Ways

“How about those Tampa Bay Rays?” Gov. Sarah Palin shouted in Jacksonville last week. “You know what that tells me, it tells me that the people in this area know a little something about turning an underdog into a victor,” she said. “And we’re counting on you to help us do that Nov. 4.”

However, at a rally in New Hampshire on October 15, Palin appealed to the other side of the coin, “We’re just 20 days out from the election and it’s gonna come right down to the wire, and we’re counting on you because Red Sox fans know how to turn an underdog into a victor, and that’s exactly what you can help us do on Nov. 4!”

So much for straight talk. Unless straight talk means being duplicitous and disingenuous. Does being a maverick mean saying ANYTHING to try and appeal to people?

“Apparently this team of mavericks thinks straight talk means saying one thing to Rays fans and another to Red Sox fans,” chimed in DNC spokesman Damien LaVera.

Reader Youppi sent along this image to me and, since this blog is all class, I’m posting it below the jump. It’s a bit off color, it’s more than a bit inappropriate and it’s more than a bit hilarious.

Continue reading ‘Sarah Palin Goes Both Ways’


The Ladies Love Longoria

Sure, Evan Longoria had an errant throw that directly led to the winning run in last night’s ball game–although I firmly believe that Pena should have received the error there, the ball bounced in front of him enough for him to readjust and catch it, he’s the one who should have gotten the error–but he has plenty of exciting other things going on. For example, he reportedly has a hot girlfriend.

Longoria has been spotted at a University of Southern Florida football game with a quite attractive lass. (Video HERE) Some sleuthing by the gents over at Sports by Brooks and they think they’ve identified the mysterious young lady, she’s Jaime Hanna, by day a a dental hygienist, on the weekends, a 2 year veteran of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers cheerleading squad.

Now, I’m not 100% they are the same lady, but hey, cheerleader photos right…

[Sports by Brooks]


About Last Night

Someone tell Chip Caray that a game isn’t over in the 6th and maybe it’s not the right time to announce that they “are dancing in the streets of St. Pete” before the game is over. Fortunately Caray used the line AGAIN at the end of the game, saying “they are dancing in the streets of Boston tonight!” Great. Someone kidnap him before game 6. Feel free to take Buck Martinez too who apparently finds it impossible to believe that any minute of the game can go by without his chiming in on SOMETHING. Let Ron Darling call the game solo. Hell, give Gary Cohen and Keith Hernandez a call. They certainly aren’t doing anything else.

That game was ridikilous. 7 runs. 7!!! Wow. That game HAS to be demoralizing for the Rays. If in game 1 they were tight and nervous, they have to be back in St. Pete today with nothing but how the only team to ever blow a bigger lead in the playoffs was the CUBS! Let me repeat that, the Cubs. The team known solely for their futility. You don’t EVER want to be mentioned in line with ANYTHING the Cubs do in playoffs. If you are, it’s almost always something ignominious.

Well. We got ourselves a series once more.

Let’s Go RED SOX!


Rays Fans Meet Hubris, Hubris Rays Fans

The playoffs always feature some interesting t-shirt designs from fans. Usually the shirts are a little crude (see “Jeter Sucks A-Rod”) or overconfident, but they are made by fans so that makes sense. On the other hand, for a franchise, particularly one in the playoffs for only the first time and who has won a single series to come out with their own sanctioned, MLB shop t-shirt like this is simply unfathomable.

WOW. That’s a pretty bold t-shirt to be offering. Talk about overweening pride. Hasn’t anyone told them the story of Icarus. I hope someone shows these to the Sox players. Again, it’d be one thing if this were a fan-made shirt. But it ain’t. You can purchase it through the Rays’ official team store on I simply don’t get it. Confident is one thing, cocky is OK too, but c’mon, you haven’t done a goddamn thing yet. I look forward to some drubbings now. Let’s GO SOX!

[Home Run Derby]


Tampa Bay Not Experienced at Celebrating

I am very excited by the Tampa Bay Abbadon Rays finally entering the playoffs, and as a divison champ no less! If they weren’t in the AL East I would be a HUGE Rays fan. I lOVE the Rays. But alas, they play my friendly Red Sox and so must be crushed in our wake. For the Sox, a team accustomed to celebrating regular and then post-season success, the celebrations have become expected, and if not for Jonathan Papelbon would be almost stale. The Rays, unsure of how to properly celebrate their moment made some mistakes but hey, they’re new to this so we’ll give them a break. Then again, here they are drinking Bud Light out of a protective cup so…

So, Johnny Gomes likes to drink in the sweat of his teammates’ junk, which is special and I guess helps foster the true spirit of comradery. Also the team managed to persuade the hipster manager, Joe Maddon into taking a healthy swig too, which is all the more impressive since Maddon is such a big oenophile. That means he likes wine a lot smart guys!

[Big League Stew]

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June 2023