Sandy, Sandy Baby

Yesterday a list with the 13,000 names of Bernie Madoff’s victims was released and there were some very interesting names on the list. For example, how Madoff could bilk Sandy Koufax out of his money is simply astonishing, he’s Sandy KOUFAX! How dare you Bernie. Sure, you cheat a bunch of other rich people, no big deal, but Sandy is the greatest Jewish baseball player ever, and you tried to ruin him! For shame.

Koufax it turns out went to high school with Mets owner Fred Wilpon who had millions of dollars invested with Madoff as well, so presumably we can also blame the Wilpons for hurting Koufax. Among the victims was also former Mets “star” Tim Teufel, currently the manager of the Mets’ entry in the Florida State League. How DARE you Madoff?

The Wilpons were heavily invested with Madoff, with Fred, Jeff, Jeff’s wife, Jeff’s sister, Jeff’s brother in law, multiple charity organizations, two Brooklyn Cyclones entities and various other Mets related businesses all losing millions of dollars. So that’s why there isn’t any money left in the budget for Manny…

As a Jew I’m ashamed with Bernie Madoff. Sure, taking $50 BILLION is bad, but I think we can all understand it, but to rob from SANDY KOUFAX!!!!?!?!?! Unacceptable. Madoff knew it was a scam, why didn’t he tell Sandy to invest elsewhere, it’s one thing to rob from fellow Jews, it’s quite another to rob from Sandy Koufax, and that is something I will never forgive.


5 Responses to “Sandy, Sandy Baby”

  1. 1 shatraw
    February 5, 2009 at 12:02 pm

    for the first time, i’m happy that i’m NOT a jew.

    is there such a thing as “jew envy?” because if so, i have it.

    except for today. madoff, how could you do this to our (your) [God’s choosen] people!

  2. 2 the sister
    February 5, 2009 at 6:50 pm

    what is it about sandy koufax that makes you suddenly embrace your jewiness?

  3. February 6, 2009 at 10:51 am

    “what is it about sandy koufax that makes you suddenly embrace your jewiness?”


  4. February 6, 2009 at 10:57 am

    A) While i dont believe the superstition side of Judaism, I do consider myself culturally a Jew

    B) Sandy Koufax has a career ERA+ of 131

    C) In his last 5 seasons he put up ERA+s of 141, 159, 187, 160, and a ridiculous 190(!!!)

    D) I think Sandy Koufax is really cool

  5. February 6, 2009 at 11:24 am

    Slanch, you’re Slanchish. And I like you.

    Now, make the baseball season start already. i can only watch looped video of pedro throwing zimmer to the ground so many times………………………….zzzzzzzzzzzz…………

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