Archive for August 13th, 2008

13
Aug
08

Alicia Sacromone Packs a Whollop

The US women’s gymnastics team faltered at the end and were forced to settle for a silver medal last night, partly on the heels of two big faults by Alicia Sacramone. But don’t tell her that, the 20 year old Brown University hottie will definitely knock you on your ass, I’m not worried, but then again, I took karate at the YMCA so…

13
Aug
08

I Don’t Think He’s Gonna Get the Gold

Strangely enough, the awkward white guy diving team has yet to medal at the Olympics…

13
Aug
08

See Anything You Like Lebron?

The fellas over at The Big Lead came up with this great photo of the US men’s basketball team taking some time off to watch Michael Phelps go for gold medals number 10 and 11. Lebron doesn’t seem to be paying too much attention to the action on the water though, seemingly distracted by something else… It’s nice to see that even after being an international superstar and having had NBA groupies hanging off him for years that Lebron maintains a healthy appetite. He truly is a phenomenal athlete.

In other news the Olympics organizers have stocked 100,000 condoms in preparation, the US basketball team has so far gone through 64,453. There are 11 days to go.

Continue reading ‘See Anything You Like Lebron?’

13
Aug
08

Bump, Set, Hot

We know the beach volleyball ladies are hot, as evidenced by here, and here, but their counterparts indoors can be equally as hot. Take for instance two young lasses I spotted last night, more well-known, Logan Tom (who has been on the FHM list of sexiest women and is also a beach volleyballer though not in the Olympics) and newcomer, tall drink of water Kim Glass. Here are a couple fun photos of them both and plenty more after the jump. Aren’t the Olympics exciting!

Logan Tom

Kim Glass

Kim Glass

Continue reading ‘Bump, Set, Hot’

13
Aug
08

Chalk Up Another Fine Presidential Moment

Continuing his tour of the US Olympic athletes, here is Cheerleader-in-Chief Bush visiting with the softball team since, like most men, he LOVES Jenny Finch. Laura Berg, the team’s resident prankster was the one who got the chalk handprint on his back. I’m just disgusted that she wanted to touch him, look at that shirt, he has totally sweat through that entire thing and you want to put your hand on a 60 year old’s sweat? Gross. Oh yeah, and now the leader of the free world looks like the nerdy kid in gym class. Look at us world, we’re a city on a hill!

[Sports by Brooks]

13
Aug
08

No Love Out There For the Men in Blue

The other night during one of the Little League World Series games the home plate umpire was knocked to the ground whilst the catcher went after a pop foul. Unable to apparently control his feet, the umpire took a few steps to get out of the way and then tripped over himself, remaining on the ground for way too long to not look foolish. Fortunately, he admitted right away that he was clumsy and out of shape and the game moved on.

But our umpires story doesn’t end there, it seems that a NJ man, probably having seen this video on television was feeling very angry towards umpires, and children in general and wanted to defend the honor of adults everwhere. After all, how dare that Little Leaguer cause an older man to fall over embarrassingly! So, when watching his son and the other 8-10 year olds playing in a Cal Ripken baseball league game in New Jersey, Thomas Lambert, a parole officer, started banging on a sign, yelling aggressive things like, “You suck!” and “Go back to umpire school!” at that umpire. When the 14 year old umpire asked Lambert to leave, and on-lookers mentioned calling the police, Lambert yelled, “I am the fucking police, and now who the fuck are you gonna call?” The umpire then came near the fencing and Lambert punched the young umpire in the face through the mesh fence.

It turns out though, that the ump’s dad is ALSO a cop, and it turns out THAT’s who they fucking called. Lambert is now facing an assault charge and is being investigated now by his work at the parole office as well. The best part of this story is the awful “reporting” done by the shitacular local Fox reporter guy who hounds Lambert to get zero quotes and then inexplicably decides to show the same stupid uninformative shots twice, that’s some real fine reporting you’re doing.

13
Aug
08

That is Not Supposed to Do That

My first thought on seeing this was of the All-Drug Olympics SNL sketch, but unfortunately for Janos Baranyai the Hungarian weightlifter who, in the 148 kg lifting competition suffered an awful dislocation of his elbow, the picture isn’t pretty, the video after the jump is even worse and this is all real. Enjoy!

Oh and how is weightlifting an Olympic sport? I mean, isn’t it just exercise? Couldn’t theoretically any of the athletes do the weightlifting competition? If Weightlifting is an event then shouldn’t the stairmaster be one too?

Continue reading ‘That is Not Supposed to Do That’




Follow The Slanch Report

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 19 other subscribers

Sign Our Petition!

The Slanch Report has started an online petition asking the MLB Network to air the Dock Ellis no-hitter he threw on June 12, 1970 against the San Diego Padres. The moment was a seminal piece of baseball history and is certainly worthy of being rerun.

Please join us in this cause and sign the petition below so we can all share in this special and fantastic moment of baseball history. THANKS!
SIGN THE PETITION HERE! AND PLEASE TELL YOUR FRIENDS AND PASS THIS ALONG!

August 2008
M T W T F S S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031

Categories