Archive for September 16th, 2009


Family Game-Night Just Got Way More Fun

I wouldn’t be the Mets-hater that I’m accused of being if I didn’t post this absolutely fantastic interactive graphic from that bastion of baseball, The Wall Street Journal. So, without anymore ado, here is MetsSloppily! Click on the image to go to the full-size version and appreciate it in it’s full glory.



League Won’t Let Albino Kid Wear Tinted Shield Just Cuz

620wtmj_091609cooneyfootballGraham Bartunek played football for several years in Kansas City without a problem but when his family moved to Oconomowoc, Wisconsin the Parks and Recreation Department started giving him fits. The 12-year-old has albinism which also has made him partially blind and makes it dangerous for him to be in direct sunlight. Where his old league allowed him to wear a tinted face shield, the new one is refusing to allow it.

“I was really mad and upset because the face shield really helps me and makes it hard to play without it,” Graham said.

The officials say that the shield violates federal safety rules which require a player’s eyes to be showing. However, like in the NFL, with a doctor’s note justifying it it shouldn’t be an issue.

“I just don’t understand why they won’t allow it. It’s beyond me,” Graham’s father Paul said. “The face shields are allowed in football. The NFL allows them. We have a doctor’s note to justify the need. It’s about vision. It’s about sun exposure,” Paul said. “He’s very sensitive to the sun, and we’re looking to get some additional protection. A clear visor is a legal device. We’re just asking for a reasonable accommodation to add a tint to a legal device.”

Currently Graham has been wearing sunglasses during the games, but they fall off constantly and don’t protect his skin which is just as big an issue as his eyes. But, the young lad has had a good attitude throughout insisting that he will do whatever he has to in order to stay on the team and the field.

“The rule book clearly states that there can be reasonable exceptions made for student athletes with disabilities.” Paul said, “I asked [the officials], ‘what would be more reasonable to ask for?'”

Hey, Oconomowoc stop being dicks to a 12-year-old! The kid just wants to play the game and should be able to do so; so he wears a tinted shield, big deal, oh is it better instead that he’s in pain and danger by not wearing it? Arg, I can’t stand stupid people.

[620 WTMJ]


Lottery Winner Squanders Winnings on Soon-to-Fail Wrestling Venture

jayvargasAfter becoming the youngest Powerball winner two years ago, Jay Vargas, now 21-years-old has relocated to Tampa Bay intent on making his dream of being in the wrestling business come true. After winning a $17 million lump sum, Vargas didn’t just squander his money, “I don’t have the temptation to go out and buy 15 cars or 50 houses, or a big mansion with 50-plus rooms… I just want to be comfortable,” he said.

Instead, he’s living in a modest home in New Tampa with his wife and setting his mind (and money) towards making an epic new TV show. The show, called “Wrestlicious” is a combination “MAD TV + the WWE + Baywatch + Dave Chappelle = Wrestlicious,” according to Vargas. Primarily though it’s just attractive women in various tight outfits.

Vargas also appears as “J.V. Rich” the rapper-owner of the “Wrestlicious.”

Tampa is apparently the home to many wrestlers which is why he made his home there. Working with famed wrestling promoter Jimmy Hart, they’ve already shot a pilot and are shopping it around to the networks to find it a place to air. I don’t see how it can fail…

Seems like a smart way to spend your millions of dollars, sigh.



Posada Takes Exception, Provides “Cheap Shot”


Toronto Blue Jay Jesse Carlson was never a pretty man, after last night he added a handsome welt to his grisly visage after upsetting Yankees catcher Jorge Posada. After coming around the bases, Posada threw an elbow into Carlson who was covering home plate in a move that home plate umpire Jim Joyce called “unsportsmanlike” and a “cheap shot.”

(video of the whole affair is HERE)

Previously the Yankees had hit Toronto’s Aaron Hill and so Carlson threw behind Posada as retaliation. Carlson didn’t hit him though and while both benches emptied in an empty gesture, there weren’t any ramifications beyond both teams being warned.

It was Posada who started the whole affair the second time by shoving of Carlson and that led to the full emptying of the benches and a full-on brawl. Of course, most of the players were just standing around on the outskirts afraid of being touched. It wouldn’t be a douchey brawl if Shelley Duncan didn’t get in the middle of it. Seriously, this dude doesn’t do anything on the field but always wants to fight SOMEONE. What the hell is his problem, take an anger management class or drink some herbal tea or something.

One player who apparently was eager to be touched was A-Rod, because, after all it wouldn’t be a big piling up of men without him throwing out a super gay-sounding quote: “It got pretty heavy and pretty thick pretty quickly.” Yowzers, you want some more dick with that quote?

[Big League Stew and ESPN]


Well That’s Just Precious

Catching a foul ball is a great moment for a fan; for this Phillies fan with his young daughter it’s all the sweeter because he can give the precious ball to her for a memento that she is sure to treasure for the rest of her life.

Or she would have if she didn’t throw it immediately back onto the field. I guess she’s not a Jayson Werth fan?

Vodpod videos no longer available.

[The 700 Level]


Chicago Not Being Very Sweet to Sweetness

They used to call him Sweetness, but now the Chicago Parks District are being quite sour towards Walter Payton. Ten years after he died, his friends and family have been trying to get a statue of Payton outside Soldier Field to no avail.

According to the Paytons, park officials claim the area around Soldier Field is solely to serve as a memorial to war veterans. The parks officials also are concerned for other Bears Hall of Famers who don’t have statues of their own outside the stadium and that their feelings might be hurt.

As a compromise, the parks department is willing to put the Payton statue in any other Chicago Park — Go for Wrigley!

The Bears are interested in having the statue but since the parks department oversees Soldier Field and the ground surrounding it, the decision is ultimately up to them. Regardless, the family is going ahead with the statue which is being constructed in Sarah Palin’s hometown of Wasilla, Alaska by sculptor Stan Watts and intend to unveil it and then donate it to the city on November 7.

[Chicago Tribune]


It Appears America Was Ready for Football

NielsensThe Nielsen’s ratings from last week are out and amongst adults aged 18-49 football reigns supreme. The top 6 slots were all football with NBC’s Sunday and Thursday broadcasts taking the top slots; Hell’s Kitchen took 7th.

The only question I have is how King of the Hill managed to sneak into the top ten.

[TV By the Numbers]


Buffalo Fans Wreck Players Lawn in Revenge


As if things weren’t bad enough for Leodis McKelvin, after losing a fumble directly leading to the Patriots scoring the winning touchdown, when he returned to his home Tuesday in suburban Buffalo he found it vandalized by unhappy fans. On his lawn they spray-painted an obscenity, a giant phallus and the final score for the game 25-24.

Bills linebacker Kawika Mitchell was not amused and on his Twitter wrote: “W/ all the safety issues n the NFL its not funny at all. We have Fam at our homes to protect. If u show ur face on my prop Ill make sure I do everythin to keep my Fam safe.”

“Its my job to protect my home as it is the job of all home owners. Dont push the limit,” Mitchell wrote.

C’mon Bills fans, you know better than this. It’s a long season, if you’re going to vandalize the players homes after EVERY loss local hardware stores in the Buffalo area are going to run out of spray-paint very quickly. Besides, you’re taking spray-paint away from teenagers who want to do REAL vandalism.

And huffers, won’t anyone think of the huffers?!!?

[Democrat and Chronicle]

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September 2009