Archive for March 20th, 2009


TMI From USC Radio Man

Announcers should never be the story, unless they have some serious sexual hang-ups, (nod, Marv Albert) so this story about USC radio football play-by-play man Pete Arbogast is pretty useless; but hey, it’s a slow day today and everyone else is paying attention to college basketball…

While on some internet radio show called the LuvCh@t, hosted by famed broadcaster Jim “The Poorman” Trenton, Arbogast decided to talk about the size of his junk, his favorite sexual positions and getting ass on the road, all within the first few minutes of the chat.

The show, sponsored by ExtenZe and a sex-toy company also interviewed Arbogast’s wife who came on inexplicably with their teenage son to discuss her and her husband’s sex life. When asked what the Mrs. Arbogast’s favorite position was, ever the gentleman, her husband interrupts and says “Let’s just say it’s a number.” Gee thanks for the information Dad! Now if you don’t mind, I’m gonna go burn my brain with acid in an attempt to rid myself of that image…

[LA Daily News via Sports by Brooks]


ALexander the Great Makes His Return

The Washington Capitals’ Alexander Ovechkin scored his 50th goal of the season last night, making him the first NHL’er to reach that point this year. This is the third time Ovechkin has reached the 50 goal pinnacle in his 4 seasons in the NHL, coming close with the other season finishing at 45 goals. So, to commemorate his accomplishment, here is a video of all 50 goals he’s made so far this season. Enjoy!


Whither Screech?

The Screaming Eagles of Cape Breton are a Canadian junior hockey team who should be gearing themselves up for the playoffs, instead, the team is desperately searching for its missing mascot. Club officials reported that, after finding a supply door unlocked, they found that their $5,000 Screech the Eagle mascot costume was missing. It was last seen March 11.

“I’m doing OK,” Peter MacDonald, the hockey club’s director of marketing, said Thursday afternoon. “I’d be better if I had a mascot. To be perfectly honest, it’s been very inconvenient. I’ve spent a lot of time this week looking for [the costume] when I should be worrying about other things leading up to the game.”

The police are investigating the crime but the team has announced that if the suit were returned they wouldn’t press any charges. The 8 people with access to the room all deny involvement and there are no other leads for the police to follow at this time as there are no surveillance cameras in the arena.

With the playoffs just around the corner, the team is planning on breaking out an older, smellier version of the mascot costume if the nicer, newer version cannot be located. While hockey fans are notoriously a superstitious bunch, head coach Mario Durocher laughed off the suggestion that the missing mascot could affect his his players’ concentration.

“You’re not serious? There could be [only] one person in the building and there would no impact on my players. There could be 10,000 people and there should be no impact on my players. So with a mascot or not, if there’s noise or not, we should be focused as a hockey team. As a player, you have to focus on the ice, on what you control.”

Screaming Eagles fan Eddie Farrell took a dimmer approach to the situation, “We’re going into the playoffs, you don’t change horses now. I don’t think people want to see a new uniform coming out just before the playoffs. It’d be the same if the whole team suddenly had different jerseys. It won’t affect them [the players] at all. We’re still going to win, but if we lose, I guess we can blame the mascot.”

[The Chronicle Herald]



San Jose Sharks winger Brad Staubitz likes to use his hands–I’d imagine he could be an accomplished woodworker–when he’s on the ice, particularly when he can mash in an opponent’s face as he did to the Nashville Predators’ Jordin Tootoo. The refs stop this fight before it gets worse but Staubitz gets in a whole lot of face shots before they do, bloodying up Tootoo. And the hockey overlords want to get RID of fighting?


Another Great Minors Promotion

website_frontMy favorite minor league hockey team, the Las Vegas Wranglers — who we previously celebrated for their Rod Blagojevich Night — are at it again with a promotion sure to bring in the crowds. On Tuesday the ECHL team will host an adult-themed “Over 18 Night.”

In attendance in the stands will be members of the American Storm, an all-male strip revue normally at the V Theater in the Planet Holleywood Casino. As well, there were be instructors from the casino’s Stripper 101 class, there to teach all the lady hockey fans how to lap dance their way to home happiness; the instructors will also be doing an “interactive performance in the bar area.”

Even better–as if male strippers and lap dances aren’t enough–for only $20 there will be an open bar from 7:30 to 9:05 featuring Russian Standard vodka, Crown Royal, Tommy Bahama rum, Bombay Sapphire gin and Patron Silver tequila. Yum!

According to the team, fans under the age of 18 must be accompanied by a guardian as “Programming may contain elements found in R-Rated motion pictures including language and/or mild adult content.” Elements like in an R-rated movie? YES! Count me in!

The impetus for this wonderful promotion? A night the team’s president and owner spent at a bar together, where the idea eventually was preserved on a cocktail napkin. I’d expect nothing less for such a classy affair.

[Las Vegas Sun]


I’m Pretty Sure That’s a Foul

Morgan State had zero chance of besting #1 seed Oklahoma in their match-up last night; something Morgan State’s Ameer Ali took personally it seems. Here he gets slightly entangled with All-American Blake Griffin and decides to do the only rational thing; take Blake over the shoulder and body slam him. Seems like a good idea, I’m sure no one will notice you manhandling the consensus best player in the country… Oh yeah, and Morgan State was 24 points down at the time so, that’s classy. Ali was thrown out of the game and Oklahoma went on to a 82-54 victory and a round 2 berth, Morgan State will receive participation t-shirts.

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March 2009