Because it tickles me so, I’m sharing the latest name for my fantasy baseball team.
I Smell Sexson Candy
Man, I’m clever!
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Archive Page 161
18
Jul
08
Today in 90s Pop Rock
18
Jul
08
Manny’s Final Straw
I am definitely a Manny Ramirez apologist, I tolerate his antics and stupid actions sometimes because he’s one of the greatest right-handed hitters ever, hell, I practically fellated him 2 months ago. When he got in trouble for pushing the team’s traveling secretary, I thought it was bullshit, petulant and childish, but I wasn’t advocating throwing him off the team or suspending him or anything. I figured, as Terry Francona and Theo Epstein said, that the issue would be handled in-house and that was all I needed to know. Apparently, according to former Boston sportscaster Bob Lobel, Manny ended up receiving a fine in the six figures that went to charity from the team. Good. Totally appropriate and I’m sure it can help some people even if Manny doesn’t learn anything.
Lobel went on in his interview on WEEI sports radio to say that
The thing that most people are forgetting and haven’t talked about is the strikeout in Yankee Stadium. The bat on the shoulder for the three pitches from Mariano Rivera. That was a big [expletive] to the Red Sox after the fine. I’m just telling you … there are things in the front office that are perceived … I’m saying that there is a strong feeling that that [three-pitch strikeout] was the message to the Red Sox and it’s a strong feeling that that’s unacceptable … there’s a feeling that he didn’t give it his all, let’s put it that way … I’m just saying the front office has not forgotten that moment. It’s akin to Nomar sitting on the bench [in a game in which Derek Jeter dove into the stands at Yankee Stadium in 2004]. It’s the same thing. It’s an at bat that resonated very strongly in the front office.
I love women’s beach volleyball, I think I’ve shown that in the last few days with post after post celebrating that which is most good about this beautiful game. The Olympics might be very boring, but count me in as planning on dvring and watching every beach volleyball match possible. Except maybe for the Indian team’s games. That’s because they think wearing the standard outfits of the sport, the delightfully small and tight bikinis, to be against their traditions and objectionable.
Um, hello, this is half the reason why your game is an Olympic sport, it’s basically one step up from paddle ball. “We want to give a good fight in the game and not the dress code,” said Kanaka Mahalakshmi, one of the members of the Indian team. The rules of beach volleyball do allow for women, “out of respect for the religious, cultural and ethical sentiments of participating countries” to wear different outfits, and so the Indian women will be wearing shorts and t-shirts. Boring!
Zoe Chater, a Frenchwoman in India to play in a tournament who will be wearing her bikini said, “everything is possible in sports to respect culture of different countries. We don’t mean to offend anyone. We are here to play the sport.” I think I know which team the crowd will get behind.
The story of the topless blonde in the Rogers Centre Skydome box just keeps getting better. The 26 year old spoke today with the Ottawa Sun paper, the initial publisher of the photos of her, saying that she thought the windows were tinted and no one would be able to see through them.
“The [bachelor party hosts] told me that no one could see in,” she explained. Looks like that’s the last time she trusts a bachelor party crew. You’d think she’d have done her research and seen what these affairs could be like.
The young woman, who prefers to remain anonymous, is in grad school and works as a “hostess” to help pay for her school costs. I feel like I’ve heard that one before, maybe from every other hooker ever. I mean, not that I have a lot of experience with hookers. Unless paying women to have sex with me is experience. In that case I may need to change my response…
“I am not ashamed of what I do, there’s nothing wrong with this…but not everyone knows I do this,” she said. Unfortunately for her, the Blue Jays do see something wrong with it and, since her photo is out there, it looks like everyone is going to know what she does.
President and CEO of the Blue Jays Paul Godfrey said that her comportment went directly against the strict code of conduct for the erstwhile Skydome.
“It may be legal to walk the streets topless, but not at the Rogers Centre,” said Godfrey. Even T-shirts with offensive messages are not allowed in the stadium, he said. I didn’t know it was legal to walk the streets of Toronto topless, looks like it’s time for an action-packed mardi gras vacation to Toronto! Who’s coming with me, they got socialized medicine, street boobs and polite manners, what more could you need?
17
Jul
08
Beam Me Up Another Doppelganger
Reader Ian sent this doppelganger pairing in, and it looks like a winner to me. Be sure and vote in the poll below to let these doppelgangers dance in the doppelganger forest with the other doppelgangers. doppelganger.
Dave Trembley is the manager of the surprising Baltimore Orioles, whom no one expected to go anywhere this season and instead they have impressively hovered around .500 for the season. Whether or not it lasts, for Trembley, a long-time minor league manager and former bullpen coach, the ride has been awfully fun so far. William Shatner is of course most famous for his turn in Star Trek as Captain Kirk, but I prefer to think of his fine work for priceline.com as the benchmark of his career.
17
Jul
08
Heads Up!
Buster Olney wrote once in his column about how maple bats were becoming a problem, then, every other baseball media person started echoing the statement and now apparently the shattering and splintering of maple bats is a concern. The power of media! Anyways, FanIQ decided to take all the controversy and put up a nice little collection of photos of people about to get slammed by a flying bat. Hilarious! Check out the rest of their photos here.
I love this one, especially the little baby reaching for it, you just know she’s about to get clocked.
[FanIQ]
17
Jul
08
Yummy Olympic Athletes
One of the things I love about the Olympics is that the villages where the athletes stay have thousands of condom distributors around because the athletes are constantly boning one another. And why not? They’re all in incredible shape, and once you do your event you’ve got like a 2 week party vacation with nothing else to do. Plus all those raging hormones from increased testosterone and whatever from exercising so much leads to lots of needed stress relief. Of course, it doesn’t hurt to be incredibly attractive like some of these athletes. Gawker put together a very nice collection of some of the hottest athletes who will be participating in the games, and you should definitely check out their full gallery. Enjoy!
Stephanie Rice, Australian Swimmer
Lu Xuan, Chinese Gymnast
Elka Graham, Australian Swimmer
[Gawker]
17
Jul
08
SNUBBED!
The Emmy nominations are in and the fact that The Wire didn’t receive even a single nomination for anything is one of the biggest pieces of Hollywood bullshit ever.
Really, you’re saying that Kyra Sedgewick and The Closer are a better show? Who the fuck even watches that?
While I’m psyched about the comedy noms for The Office and 30 Rock, that The Wire was overlooked is an embarrassment to whomever it is that comes up with these nominations and I hope they get crotch rot.
Also, I wonder if Jerry Seinfeld feels dissed since pretty much every other guest star on 30 Rock got an Emmy nomination but him…
17
Jul
08
Jerry Manuel Gets Grilled
Mets manager Jerry Manuel spoke with CBS 2 in New York the other day, and since local news is so damned schlocky, they needed a nice hook, how about Jerry getting interviewed by his daughter, Natalie, who is working as an intern at CBS this summer (I wonder how she got that job…)
I thought Manuel’s response when asked if the interim title bothered him was great, saying “I really disregard the title. I think even when you have a contract you’re interim.”
Fast forward to about 1:30 to see Manuel’s cute daughter asking her daddy about discipline.
Vodpod videos no longer available.
17
Jul
08
Sad Day For Baseball
First Alyssa Milano announces that she no longer will be dating baseball players–we’re dating now instead–and now this, Hideo Nomo has announced his retirement. It’s like baseball is losing all the great ones.
For Nomo, this technically marks his second retirement, as in order to become the first Japanese pitcher in the US, he had to “retire” from Japanese baseball, thus using a loophole to leave his contract in Japan and come play for the Dodgers. In his first year in the bigs, Nomo won the Rookie of the Year award, led the league in strikeouts and started the All Star game, striking out 3 of the 6 batters he faced. His second season featured his first of two no-hitters, in pre-humidor Colorado no less!
Dave Glauser is just a typical dude from Toledo, he’s 61 years old, works as an auto parts salesman and enjoys playing sports. It just so happens though, that he’s awesome at sports. On Monday, while playing a round at Giant Oaks Golf Club in Temperance, Ohio, he fired in a hole-in-one. That’s pretty neat, but not extraordinary, lots of people have done that, even at his age.
However, this is now his 3rd hole-in-one, to go along with the 3 times he’s rolled a perfect 300 bowling game. According to about.com, the odds of an amateur golfer hitting a hole-in-one is 1 in 12,750 and for rolling a perfect game, 1 in 11,500. This guy has now done both, 3 times each!
“He’s very modest about it,” Glauser’s daughter, Allison Schroeder, said. “He pretends like he’s calling about something else and then he says, oh by the way, I got a hole-in-one. He’s very excited about it, but he’s not the type to brag.”
Glauser has no intention of slowing down, “I’ll keep going as long as I can. I’ll keep doing the same old thing, playing until I can’t play anymore. I just love the challenge and I try to keep active.”
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