Posts Tagged ‘Stephanie Rice


Hottie Swimmer is On the Market — Waiting for Me

Back during the Beijing Olympics, I fell for Australian swimming sensation Stephanie Rice, and I know that if she were to meet me she’d feel the same way. She must have sensed that because, since the Olympics and her breakup with a fellow swimmer she has been linked to several men but according to her, none of the rumors are true.

“Everyone’s always ‘Steph, you need a boyfriend’ and I’m like ‘I know, but apparently I have four’. Believe me, one would be just perfect,” she said.

Stephanie also added that while she’s busy with training and being in the public eye, that isn’t stopping her from looking for a gentleman friend. “I can definitely fit it in, that’s not my problem and I’m not making that an excuse,” but it’s not always easy knowing people’s motivation. “It’s hard to tell if people like the idea of (a relationship with Stephanie Rice) or if they really like you,” she said.

Well, Stephanie, despite having never met you, I can say that I’m in it for YOU and not your fame. Sure, you have worldwide fame, gold medals, sponsorship deals and seemingly you have it all, but without the proper life-companion, it’s all useless. Let’s take this journey through life together, let’s meet up, say halfway, how about we meet in LA?

Call me!

Also, can someone buy me a plane ticket to LA?

And the rest of you, stay away!

[Courier Mail]


Finally, a Swimmer Starts Talking Sense

stephanie-rice-australian-swimmerJapanese swimming phenom Ryosuke Irie is upset because the international swimming regulatory body FINA has yet to ratify his record-setting 200 meter backstroke performance from last month. FINA is concerned over the bathing suit that he wore and whether or not it unfairly aided his abilities.

“It’s sad everyone keeps talking about the swimsuits. Mentally it was a bit upsetting for me,” Irie said, “My swimming went to pieces and I didn’t want to get in the pool for a while.”

“It would be better if all the swimmers did (wear tiny g-strings) but it would be tough to make them do it,” he told a Reuters reporter.

I for one am ALL in favor of, well, at least the women, wearing g-strings. I think it will add a much needed boost to the sport and capitalize on the brief period of popularity that lasted right after the Summer Olympics and has already faded from consciousness.

I would like to be the first to suggest, obviously, that my favorite swimmer, Stephanie Rice be the first to race in g-strings. Or she can just come over to my apartment in one and work on this new training regimen I’ve come up with…



Stephanie Rice Has Poor Taste in Men

I get that elsewhere in the world Big Brother is actually a well-watched and liked show, I don’t understand WHY, but that’s another story. What’s true everywhere though is that the people on the show should never EVER be considered celebrities. Even more true, the people on the show should never be allowed to be mentioned, even in just a rumor, as a possible love connection with Australian swimmer/hottie Stephanie Rice. So it is with much chagrin that I saw the story that Rice and some toolsy Aussie Big Brother guy, named Ed Cherry (fake name right?) have been spotted around town on dates, kissing and cuddling in facebook photos and partying backstage at the Nickelodeon Kid’s Choice awards. First off, I didn’t even know you were allowed to party at the Nickelodeon awards shows, let alone that they’d have like copious amounts of liquor, then again, if I had to do such a humiliating type award show I’d probably need to be hammered too. Secondly, stay away reality TV boy, I obviously haven’t seen the show, but you shouldn’t be famous or known, please fade back into obscurity immediately. And leave Stephanie alone. Also, Stephanie, who wants a lame ass fake reality TV guy, even if he is a surfer dude when you can have a sports blogger? I mean right?


Stephanie Rice: Just Like Us

I must be prescient, I post that picture of Stephanie Rice yesterday and then BAM, today, pictures of her partying out come out. The world must love me. It seems that Stephanie and some friends went to Thailand for a weekend of funtimes and after agreeing to let some rando dude take a photograph of her Rice noticed that he kept snapping photographs for the rest of the evening. Understandably she’s upset because she is 20 years old and wants to be able to just go out and enjoy herself like anyone else her age. I agree, she should be just left alone, with me, on a romantic date where she is wooed. But, since the pictures are out there, I’d be remiss to ignore them. The Daily Telegraph, the newspaper that bought the photos fortunately also provides two other galleries with nearly 100 other Rice photos for our visual appreciation, so there’s that too. Since the Olympics ended Rice has been keeping busy, signing an $800,000 contract with Channel 7, and recently filmed her first segment for Better Homes and Gardens. Now, after having not swum since Beijing she’s been getting back into the pool and starting her training once more. “I set goals for myself in Beijing and some (swimming) times I set I didn’t achieve, so I am looking forward to moving forward and that motivates me. But swimming careers don’t really last a long time. I really want to continue doing the TV stuff when I finish my swimming career.” Sounds like a good plan to me.

Anyhoo, the galleries are here, here and here and feature photos like the ones below. The photos from Thailand in the first gallery aren’t particularly interesting but hey, any Stephanie Rice makes me happy.

Sigh. Swoon.


Australian Football Sounds Like a Fun Time

I have no idea how Australian rules Football works, is it the same as American football? Some weird combination of rugby and football? Whatever, it doesn’t matter. This story from Melbourne makes the Australian Football League sound extremely interesting.

The Western Bulldogs’ defensive coach Peter Dean has made headlines because he got punched multiple times the other night by a bouncer outside the Waterside Hotel on Friday after he and another Western Bulldogs employee were not allowed into a pub. Dean was apparently not drunk but his companion was intoxicated and helped cause the general incident. According to the owner of the Hotel, also a former Bulldogs player, Stuart Wigney, the two men were refused entry and then tried to sneak in through a backdoor which led to the altercation.

The Waterside, which is one of the sponsor’s of the Bulldogs haven’t commented publicly yet until they review the security tapes but obviously are concerned about the whole incident. Among the other connections to the team and the Hotel, Wayne Campbell, another part-owner of the Hotel was, until last year, the midfield coach for the Bulldogs. Even stranger, Dean, who is also randomly an electrician used to do work at the Hotel before the current ownership group took over.

I love Australia. After the jump, completely unrelated, one of the main reasons I love the Aussies.

Continue reading ‘Australian Football Sounds Like a Fun Time’


SNL Taps Personality Challenged Athlete for Season Opener

Michael Phelps, star of awkward television interviews throughout the Olympics, not to mention the INCREDIBLY awkward London segment of the Beijing closing ceremonies has been chosen to host the 34th season opener of Saturday Night Live. I can see the desire on SNL’s part, after all, Phelps is an incredible global phenomena right now and his presence should guarantee a nice audience from him alone. That said, he’s never shown, in any of his interviews, any sort of humorous abilities, or really much of a personality, so the SNL writers are going to have quite the journey ahead of them. I hope against hope that he decides to regrow this amazing facial hair for the show.

However, I am also incredibly distraught at the news that Phelps and my dream swimmer, Australian Stephanie Rice, who won 3 gold medals of her own, hooked up at the Olympics. The story came out while I was out in the woods and so I only just saw it today. Sure he’s a great swimmer and everything, but I thought she and I were going to have something really special. We still can, but it won’t ever be the same…

Also, one more reason to watch the SNL premier will be the debut of one of the funniest and nicest people I have ever known, SNL’s newest cast member and fellow improviser, Bobby Moynihan.

For some of the best athlete hosted sketches on SNL ever, check out this link from Fan IQ.


Rice in the Water is Oh So Nice

When the Olympics start in a few days there are a few events and sports that I am more excited for than others, for example, beach volleyball will I’m sure receive high Nielson ratings in the Slanchelor Pad. One of my favorite athletes at the games, Australian swimmer Stephanie Rice, has been making some headlines recently because she broke up with her fellow Aussie swim team member boyfriend before the games so that they could both concentrate on their events, and for posing in FHM on the eve of the games, Both sound like great reasons to be in the news to me!

I’d post the FHM photos, but frankly, they’re fairly tame, and to me, this ad campaign she did with her then-boyfriend for an underwear company are significantly more interesting. So, now that she’s single, I just need you friendly readers to come up with enough cash to buy me a ticket to Beijing and she and I can get started on our life together. So dig deep gang.


Yummy Olympic Athletes

One of the things I love about the Olympics is that the villages where the athletes stay have thousands of condom distributors around because the athletes are constantly boning one another. And why not? They’re all in incredible shape, and once you do your event you’ve got like a 2 week party vacation with nothing else to do. Plus all those raging hormones from increased testosterone and whatever from exercising so much leads to lots of needed stress relief. Of course, it doesn’t hurt to be incredibly attractive like some of these athletes. Gawker put together a very nice collection of some of the hottest athletes who will be participating in the games, and you should definitely check out their full gallery. Enjoy!

Stephanie Rice, Australian Swimmer

Stephanie Rice, Australian Swimmer

Lu Xuan, Chinese Gymnast

Lu Xuan, Chinese Gymnast

Elka Graham, Australian Swimmer

Elka Graham, Australian Swimmer


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January 2023