Archive Page 154

28
Aug
08

Novak Djokovic Must Be Stopped

By slanch 3 Comments
Categories: Hot Women and Tennis
Tags: , ,

Bronze-medal winning tennis player Novak Djokovic appears to have been the real big winner at the Olympics this year. Sure, bronze is nice, but the real prize that Djokovic seems to have won was sitting in the stands cheering him on yesterday at the US Open. That would be the delectable Leryn Franco whom we have already seen to be an incredible classy smokeshow. According to Page 6 in the NY Post the two are an item now, or at least hooking up, and “she was sitting in the stands at Ashe Stadium yesterday cheering as Djokovic beat France’s Arnaud Clement in straight sets.”

I simply don’t understand why she isn’t into me, I mean, I did plaster her picture across the internet and get thousands of men to objectify her. Isn’t that enough? I give and I give and I give. WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT FROM ME LERYN?!!!?

28
Aug
08

Joe Torre Loves to Screw With Relievers

By slanch 1 Comment
Categories: Baseball and Douches
Tags: , , ,

Tanyon Sturtze, who previously was abused by Joe Torre’s bullpen mismanaging in New York was informed by his manager Wednesday afternoon that he was being designated for assignment. As he sat by his then-former locker, packing his things and saying goodbye to teammates, Torre came back up to Sturtze a few minutes later and informed him that they were NOT releasing him at that moment. When reporters asked Torre for Sturtze’s reaction, Torre responded saying, “He’s not OK.” Gee, you think?We’ve seen Torre be completely inept at the handling of a modern bullpen, (I’m still convinced that Scott Proctor must have nailed Torre’s wife or something for the sheer amount of abuse that Torre heaps on his arm) but usually he only is unable to manage them on the field, now it turns out he is inept in the locker room as well.

Sure, Sturtze is a scrub and has only appeared in 3 games this season for the Dodgers, but he is also a 12 year veteran and no one deserves to be treated like that. Torre’s justification? “He knew [when he was called up two weeks ago] it was on a temporary basis.” In the meantime, Cory Wade, for whom Sturtze’s roster spot was to be used is still unready to come off the DL and so Sturtze, for the moment, remains a Dodger. I’d say when Sturtze eventually does get released that anything less than the complete trashing and possibly setting on fire of Torre’s office is a missed opportunity.

27
Aug
08

What Happened to the Hot Beach Volleyballer?

By slanch 4 Comments
Categories: Hot Women, Other Sports and Television
Tags: , , , , ,

Florida Marlins scrub catcher Matt Treanor’s wife, otherwise known as the infinitely more successful, athletic and talented US beach volleyballer Misty May-Treanor, is going to be on the next installment of shlockfest “Dancing With the Stars.” People Magazine, bastion of fine reporting and fair analysis, opted to present this image of Misty to their readers so as to introduce her to them.

Sure, spending hours and hours in the hot beach sun can’t be great for you, but I don’t understand how she immediately became the bride of Skeletor either. Or why the editors felt that THAT was the image that was most necessary to portray May-Treanor. There are thousands of other really great images of her across the web, and not just the ones of her butt, her face features prominently in many of them too!

For example, here she is in full airbrushed glory:

And here she is in natural, candid photography:

Pretty nice if you ask me. Not the terrifying witch-lady in the first photo. But then, that’s me, and it is all superficial anyways. I just find it interesting that they chose that picture to be the one for May-Treanor. C’mon People, do a TEENSY bit more research than that…

27
Aug
08

Look What I Found in the Mail

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Baseball, Douches and Random
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

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Stealing can be fun but in the modern age it never ceases to amaze me that people don’t get that you shouldn’t sell the things you steal right away on eBay. I mean, you don’t rob a Picasso from a museum and then two days later walk around to art galleries and offer it to them right? You gotta space these things out, wait some time, let the heat die down. Doesn’t anyone pay attention to heist movies anymore? Clearly Richard Trofatter Jr. (left), a mail-carrier in Maine has no idea as to how these things work.

mathewson-christy-1915-cracker-jackThat’s because he swiped a rare 1915 Christy Mathewson Cracker Jacks card that someone else had purchased on eBay. When the buyer never received the package, he contacted the seller, who had purchased $655 in insurance on the package. The seller then contacted the USPS who launched an investigation into the disappearance of the package. What they were able to find was that the exact same card had been sold on eBay, from Maine, for $1,211 and the seller was one, Richard Trofatter Jr. Smooth dude!

If you’re going to steal, be smart about it. Scams can be, and are, quite fun, but only if you’re smart about it. Continue reading ‘Look What I Found in the Mail’

27
Aug
08

Shawn Johnson Causes Disasters

By slanch 3 Comments
Categories: Olympics and Other Sports
Tags: , ,

While en route to an appearance on The David Letterman show, Shawn Johnson’s plane was delayed because of her mere appearance. Apparently, upon hearing that she was on the plane the pilot got too excited and banged his head, forcing him to get stitches. Now, Johnson is cute, in that “I’m a chipmunk except  actual chipmunks are bigger than me sort of way,” but I don’t understand all the grown male attention being thrown her way, after all, she IS only 16… Regardless, you have to be at a pretty special point in your life when, as an airline pilot, the greatest moment is when Shawn Johnson gets on your plane. I have to believe that the other pilots at the airport bar will be constantly ragging on this pilot for the rest of his career, or at least they should be. Leryn Franco? Sure, get excited. Any of the other hot olympians, why not. But c’mon dude, she’s 16 and traveling with her parents. You really think you’re going to go back there, introduce yourself and she’s going to just fall for you instantly. And another thing, why are you so into gymnastics, the more I think about it, the more this pilot is getting more and more suspect. I definitely don’t want to ever fly on a plane with a man who gets THAT excited by a teenager.

Among the other crazed Shawn Johnson fans were the Chinese boys who held up signs proposing marriage to her from the upper tiers in the gymnastics stadium. Nothing makes a girl’s heart swoon more than a complete stranger asking her to spend the rest of her life with them. I find that asking always makes for more problems and denials, a small bottle of ether does the trick just as well and besides, who doesn’t like being chained to a radiator. It worked in Black Snake Moan right? I mean, I never saw it, but they fell in love right?

26
Aug
08

Rape Returns to the Duke Campus

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Random and Soccer
Tags: , , ,

Just when the Duke Rape scandal seemed to go away, Rape rears its not so ugly face on campus once more; Ashley Rape that is. The freshman soccer player who was ranked as the 5th best soccer recruit in the country will be joining the Blue Devils’ soccer team this fall. On the field, Rape has been a member of the Under-15, Under-16, Under-17 and Under-18 National Teams and was a selection for Sports Illustrated’s “Faces in the Crowd” this past February. Rape is, obviously, a striker with a nose for the ball, her senior year alone she scored 19 times, not to mention the 21 assists. If you see her coming down the field your defense had better stand up because she’s coming to score and score often. Remember, always go for the eyes and the groin. I hope the Duke athletic staff intends to keep her well away from the lacrosse boys and strippers, Rape should always be kept far far away from those parties.

26
Aug
08

Beckham Likes What He Sees

By slanch 6 Comments
Categories: Basketball and Soccer
Tags: , , , ,

This group of photos of David Beckham and his wife at a basketball game are truly hilarious. I love the reaction on his face in the last shot as Posh gets totally pissed at him. In his defense, that cheerleader was RIGHT there, it would have been rude for him NOT to look…

[Top New Blog]

21
Aug
08

My Preference is the Rhythm Method

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Hot Olympic Women, Hot Women, Olympics and Other Sports
Tags: , , ,

Gymnastics are always a crowd pleaser at the Olympics in terms of ratings, mostly because tiny, hot women who can bend their bodies in distinct ways are generally appealing to males. Almudena Cid is a a Spanish gymnast who performed in the rhythmic gymnastics competition, I have zero idea of how one is supposed to pronounce her name but I am able to recognize her hotnessosity. Any woman who is as flexible as she is is A-OK in my book. Cid, who is 28, has worked as a model for the underwear company, the Love Store and Nike, not to mention is one of the oldest gymnasts in the games this year and was not expected to contend for a medal at all, she is up there in the competition to become one of my future ex-wives though, so that’s a plus.

20
Aug
08

He Better Have Ordered the Frog Legs

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Baseball and Douches
Tags: , ,

The fine folk over at With Malice have a great story about former Yankee, and Rangers pitcher Hideki Irabu who hasn’t been active in baseball circles since retiring from the Hanshin Tigers in 2005; certainly his major league career was nothing worthwhile, finishing with an era of 5.15 and a grand total of 34 wins in 80 starts. Well, never fear, he’s still keeping himself busy, for example he briefly owned a Udon restaurant, although that was unfortunately shut down only a few months ago. Oh, he also lives with his mom, so he’s got that going for him.

Then, the other night in Osaka, while out to dinner with a friend, Irabu, 39, opted to pay for their meal with a credit card, which apparently in Japan is not always an accepted practice. When the manager informed Irabu that that his card was rejected, Irabu freaked out and grabbed the manager by the hair and threw him into a wall and other violence followed. Irabu was subsequently able to pay with a different card, and then was later arrested by the gendarmes; he is now out on bail. It’s good to see that he is finding active ways to occupy his time, and that the competitive edge still burns within. You know, he might be a perfect fit for the Yankees rotation now, he HAS to be better than Carl Pavano right?

[With Malice]

20
Aug
08

Her Name Was Lolo

By slanch 1 Comment
Categories: Hot Olympic Women, Hot Women, Olympics and Other Sports
Tags: , , ,

Lori “Lolo” Jones is an American hurdler who has won several national championships and a world championship in her main event, the 60 meter hurdles. Also, before the games it was rumored that she was going to race a horse but it turns out that was a hoax. Despite clipping the final hurdle in the finals of 100 meter hurdles at the games the other night, she’s still a winner to me, and really, for all of us. Only 26, she may be too old for the 2012 games, but I think she’s going to come back and dominate. Born in the heartland in Iowa, Lolo is as American as they come, and I for one want to celebrate her as a wonderful American hero, preferably on a romantic dinner date to my apartment where I chloroform her and we live a happy life together forever.

20
Aug
08

Get Well Soon!

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Baseball and Boston
Tags: ,

Carl Yastrzemski was taken to the hospital for triple bypass surgery on Tuesday. The surgery reportedly went well and he’s resting and on his way to recovery now. Take it easy Yaz and get well.

19
Aug
08

Kitesurfing Turns Terrifying

By slanch 7 Comments
Categories: Random
Tags: , ,

This video of a man getting tossed like a rag doll from the winds of Tropical Storm Fay is pretty awful, but also definitely interesting. He is currently in critical condition after having been thrown into a concrete building after being lifted up on his windsurfer and getting caught in the wind, thus being thrown around in the air first. It’s certainly not for the faint of heart but is not especially graphic. However, I don’t think I’ll be wind-surfing during a hurricane anytime soon…

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