Stealing can be fun but in the modern age it never ceases to amaze me that people don’t get that you shouldn’t sell the things you steal right away on eBay. I mean, you don’t rob a Picasso from a museum and then two days later walk around to art galleries and offer it to them right? You gotta space these things out, wait some time, let the heat die down. Doesn’t anyone pay attention to heist movies anymore? Clearly Richard Trofatter Jr. (left), a mail-carrier in Maine has no idea as to how these things work.
That’s because he swiped a rare 1915 Christy Mathewson Cracker Jacks card that someone else had purchased on eBay. When the buyer never received the package, he contacted the seller, who had purchased $655 in insurance on the package. The seller then contacted the USPS who launched an investigation into the disappearance of the package. What they were able to find was that the exact same card had been sold on eBay, from Maine, for $1,211 and the seller was one, Richard Trofatter Jr. Smooth dude!
If you’re going to steal, be smart about it. Scams can be, and are, quite fun, but only if you’re smart about it. To be fair, he is a postal worker, in Maine, so I’m not sure brains are his best attribute, but if you’re going to break the single biggest rule about being a mail carrier, than at least be a little smarter about it no? I am in constant amazement of how many people think that the things they do on eBay can’t be traced. EVERYTHING CAN BE TRACED! The amount of stories I’ve seen of idiot thieves who immediately sell their
hot goods, often RIGHT BACK TO THE PEOPLE THEY STOLE THEM FROM, who then get busted make me sad for the good ol’ days when criminals knew what they were doing and were actually smart. Now every douchebag with a computer thinks he can become some master thief. First get some brains, then start life of crime. Why am I the only one who realizes these things? Or am I simply spending way too much of my time planning elaborate heists.
I think I’ve said too much.
Prank caller PRANK CALLER.
The Slanch Report 
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