Posts Tagged ‘Tennis

24
Mar
09

She’s a Man, Man, Well, Not Really, But Once, Sorta

sarahgronetGerman tennis player Sarah Gronert has been finding it difficult to gain entry into the professional ranks and has been under intense scrutiny because she was born a hermaphrodite with both male and female genitalia. Despite being medically certified as a female, other players and coaches have very strong feelings about the matter.

One opposing coach had this to say:

There is no girl who can hit serves like that, not even Venus Williams. When I heard her story, I was in shock. I don’t know if it’s fair that she can compete or not. She does have an advantage, but if this is what the WTA have decided, they probably know best. If she begins to play continuously, within six months she will be within the Top 50. This cannot be. This is not a woman, it’s a man. She does not have the power of a woman and no woman has such a technique. She serves like a man. It’s very strange.

I for one welcome Gronert to the professional tennis ranks. Let her play, tennis is boring these days if Ana Ivanovic isn’t playing anyways, why not spice it up a bit?

[Post Chronicle]

18
Aug
08

Doubles Anyone? (UPDATED!)

France has elected to send two of her finest tennis players to the Olympics. Their talent on the courts I’m not so sure about, but their ability to titillate to me is beyond compare. My preferred partner would be Olivia Sanchez, 25, but the idea of pairing up with Alize Cornet, 18, is not an unpleasant. Sure Cornet’s nostrils seem a little too flared, but I can look past that if she can throw some power slams down on the balls. ed. to add: I was feeling bad that the photos of Olivia Sanchez weren’t truly representative of how hot she was, so I searched and found some even better ones, they are below in the gallery, viva la France!

For all the other hot Olympians of the day check out the page here and keep checking back everyday for the newest one.

Alize Cornet

Alize Cornet

Olivia Sanchez

30
Jun
08

Tennis Players are Super Hard-Core

Ah, tennis players, the manliest of all athletes.

[Lion in Oil via With Leather]

26
Jun
08

Showing One’s Butt is MY Talent Too!

Amanda Holden is apparently a judge on Brits Have Talent, a show that I can only imagine is filled with epic performances of people singing old Eton songs, stuffing their faces with scones and of course a guy who can say “quite” 1000 times in a minute. But I’m getting off my point.

In the 1970s photographer Martin Elliott took what became an iconic poster of a woman playing tennis sans the appropriate undergarments of a genteel lady. Since I ain’t genteel, I like the original picture. Holden recently posed for some photos recreating the famous poster, although she chose to be a bit more demure than the original.

Holden isn’t the hottest but for a woman in her late 30s she’s pretty decent, and really this is just an excuse for me to post the original photograph below. First is the original and then the new Holden version, obviously one is better than the other… However, check out a couple more from the shoot that are a bit better after the jump including a tasteful eating strawberries pick and a hint of camel-toe.

[Floockers]

Continue reading ‘Showing One’s Butt is MY Talent Too!’

25
Jun
08

Wimbledon Employs Pigeon Assasins

The tournament at Wimbledon has begun play, and as someone who especially loves the grass, I am excited. It hasn’t been all fun and games across the pond though, Wimbledon it seems is besieged by pigeons that disturb the players and the courts.

Initially 2 hawks were employed to dissuade pigeons from being in the area and bothering players on the courts. Unfortunately the hawks were unable to do the job completely, and so the staff at Wimbledon turned to some army marksmen to cull the pigeons.

“The hawks are our first line of deterrent, and by and large they do the job,” Wimbledon spokesman Johnny Perkins said. “But unfortunately there were one or two areas where the hawks didn’t deter the pigeons, so it was deemed necessary to take a harder approach.”

Predicatably, the whiners at PETA immediately took offense to this and started making trouble.

“Since the use of marksmen to kill pigeons appears to have been carried out as a first, rather than a last resort, and not out of a concern for public health, but rather because the animals were deemed inconvenient by players, you appear to be in clear violation of the law,” PETA vice-president Bruce Friedrich said.

Ignoring the fact that PETA is totally ignoring that Wimbledon first tried to use hawks to get rid of the pigeons, the fact that army marksmen were being used to do this is totally awesome; and second of all, who gives a shit? They’re pigeons! Even the most ardent Buddhist could care less about pigeons, they’re flying rats. They spread disease, they poop on everything and provide zero benefit to the world. Even further, it’s not as though there is a lack of pigeons in England. I’ve lived in England, there are too many goddamn pigeons there, killing the few that are around Wimbledon is no big deal and there will be no discernible difference in the nation. It’s not as though they are endangered, or protected, or useful, or attractive, or interesting.

Also, I love that, to PETA, it’s totally fine for hawks to kill pigeons but not humans. I can gurantee that the marksmen kill the birds a whole lot faster and painlessly than the hawks do. If I had to choose an expert marksman or a hawk to kill me, I think the decision is pretty easy. So PETA doesn’t mind animal-on-animal violence right? Well, what exactly are humans if not smarter animals? So Bruce Friedrich, sit down and shut up, no one is going to rally around your cause for pigeons.

Maybe if they were cuter. Or nicer. Or worthwhile in any manner. But they aren’t. I only wish the marksman could set up outside PETA. No wait, that’d be cruel.

I only wish that a swarm of hawks can be released inside PETA headquarters. I’m perfectly willing to allow some pigeons to live if it were to mean less PETA douches.

02
Apr
08

But All That Precious Cat Gut!

Mikhail Youzhny is a young Russian man who is ranked 11th in the ATP Men’s tennis rankings–ha, as if you didn’t already know! I know all my readers are rabid tennis-maniacs–who was playing in a match down in Miami the other day when he lost a point and took it quite personally. He ends up hurting himself so badly he is forced to take a timeout so he can be treated by a trainer to staunch the blood! 39 seconds into this video you’ll see what I mean.

See, this is why I’ve always said, “Never play tennis, backgammon or roulette with a Russian, or else someone’s head will bleed.” It’s my only credo.




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