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30
Oct
09

Take a Look at the Man in the Mirror

By slanch 1 Comment
Categories: Hockey
Tags: , ,

Bakersfield Condors - Michael Jackson JerseysJust like it is in baseball’s lower levels, minor league hockey teams need an extra hook to bring in the crowds, usually leading to bizarre jersey’s (here and here) or other outlandish promotions (here and here), the crazy new one of the moment this week is from the Bakersfield Condors who are planning to honor Michael Jackson at their game tonight against the Utah Grizzlies.

Bakersfield Condors - White GloveThe Jackson-themed uniforms are pretty awful, but the really terrible part of their promotion will be the single white glove that each player will wear. The promotion will also feature an auction and a raffle and the uniforms will be auctioned to benefit the Children’s Miracle Network.

If your name is Michael Jackson or Billie Jean you’ll also get free admission to the game so, at least there’s that.

[Puck Daddy]

29
Oct
09

The Best Hockey Goal You’ll See All Week

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Categories: Awesome and Hockey
Tags: , ,

Back after missing 5 games with a high ankle strain, in overtime Cal Clutterbuck of the Minnesota Wild battled in front of the net, jockeying for position. His team drives towards the net, the first shot clangs off the posts, then the REBOUND shot hits the post and there’s a fortuitous bounce in front of the net. Clutterbuck reached out and with a diving effort manages to score the overtime winning in thrilling fashion. HOCKEY SON!

28
Oct
09

Naked Hockey Sweeps the Nation, Shrinkage Ensues

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Categories: Awesome, Hockey and Poor Governing
Tags: , ,

6a00d8341c51c053ef00e54f566d0a8833-800wiLast week we saw the Tampa Bay Lightning end their practice with a game of “Naked Breakaway,” now the kids are following the example of their heroes. An Idaho junior hockey team was kicked out of a city rink when the 17- to 20-year-olds started playing the same game.

After the events on last Wednesday, the Idaho Junior Steelheads were banned from using the Idaho Ice World for 4 days and one 17-year-old was suspended through next week for taking off his underwear.

An adult, whose daughter was on a nearby rink saw the Steelheads skating in their underwear and reported it, leading the police to start an investigation, specifically to see if Boise’s public decency laws were violated.

“The investigation is pending,” said Boise Police Department spokeswoman Lynn Hightower.

The city’s public decency ordinances forbid citizens from showing their butts in public, “largely to curb erotic dance parlors. Exemptions include dance, ballet, music or dramatic performances, or artistic displays; nudity during hockey practice isn’t on the list.”

[AP]

27
Oct
09

Hey Ref, Why Don’t You Get Lost

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Categories: Awesome and Hockey
Tags: , , , , ,

During the Ducks/Leafs Monday night Anaheim’s enforcer George Parros squared off against Toronto’s resident tough-guy Colton Orr. The two tangled and threw a number of punches at one another, most of which glanced off the various pads they wore. As the fight seemed to wind down, one of the refs came close to try and separate the two pugilists and cart them off to the penalty boxes, the fighters were not down though. As the linesman approached Orr’s arm came out and shoved him to the ice, allowing Parros an opportunity to take down Orr with a right-hand punch and get him on the ice.

26
Oct
09

It’s Curtains for Booth

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Categories: Awesome and Hockey
Tags: , , , ,

Have you ever taken a shoulder to the face from a hard-skating very large man that knocks you completely unconscious? Me either. I’d like to keep it that way. David Booth of the Florida Panthers might have been able to say he too had never experienced that, until Saturday that is. Booth has the puck in the middle of the ice and then Flyers captain Mike Richards comes flying in and sends Booth somewhere into the next decade.

Booth lay prone on the ice for several minutes before a stretcher took him off the ice and to the hospital for observation.

The Panthers were advocating a suspension for Richards, but the as of right now the Flyers captain looks like he’ll avoid that fate.

23
Oct
09

These Uniforms Are Absolutely Horrible

By slanch 2 Comments
Categories: Awesome and Hockey
Tags: , , , ,

Don Cherry Military Appreciation Night SweatersI had thought these uniforms worn by the Montreal Canadiens last season were the worst that hockey had ever seen, they’ve been topped. The Kingston Frontenacs of the OHL wore special Don Cherry (the Craig Sager of hockey) inspired sweaters as part of their Don Cherry Military Appreciation Night to benefit Soldier On, a group that aids injured soldiers.

Frontenacs spokesman Jeff Stilwell and trainer Craig Belfer came up with the idea when “Last summer, we were looking at some really ugly sweaters worn in the AHL and ECHL,” Stilwell said. “We thought, ‘Wouldn’t it be cool (to do something like that)? Then it snowballed in our weekly marketing meetings. … Don Cherry’s name got thrown in when we started talking about our annual military night and, boom, the concept went into reality mode.”

I wish they hadn’t for my eyes. However, Cherry was on hand for the event and autographed each uniform which will be auctioned off for the charity, so at least this ugliness was for a good cause.

The uniforms didn’t appear to be good luck, as the Frontenacs lost 4-3.

[Puck Daddy]

23
Oct
09

Bergeron Gets “Obliterated”

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Categories: Awesome and Hockey
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Marc-Andre Bergeron made his premiere for the Montreal Canadiens last night; it didn’t go perfectly. He took a hooking penalty in his first shift, and then in the second period he gets absolutely CRUSHED into the boards on a massive hit from the Atlanta Thrashers’ Colby Armstrong. Bergeron’s teammates immediately come to his defense swinging, but Bergeron just stands, very unsteadily, nearby watching the scrum trying to clear his head.

23
Oct
09

The Lightning Show Off Their Thunder Sticks

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Categories: Awesome and Hockey
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hockey3As a way of livening up their practice, after the official portion was over the Tampa Bay Lightning played a game of “Naked Breakaway,” which requires the players to shed a piece of clothing or equipment each time they miss on a breakaway. Once you score you no longer need to continue.

Earlier this week, Martin St. Louis found himself without jersey, arm pads, leg pads, leggings and even his skates before he was finally able to convert. His teammates found it quite amusing to watch St. Louis try and score on one skate and then have to ditch that in favor of some sandals from the locker room.

“It was fun to do,” center Vinny Lecavalier said. “The guys had a good time. Guys were laughing together.”

Fortunately no one missed enough times to have to get fully naked, although after Todd Fedoruk missed, one of his teammates suggested to the gap-toothed forward to “take out the rest of your teeth.”

“Yeah, you start getting nervous after you lose a few pieces of clothing,” Lecavalier said.

[Tampa Bay]

22
Oct
09

Like Running Straight Into a Brick Wall

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Awesome and Hockey
Tags: , , , ,

When I see hits like this one that Vancouver’s Willie Mitchell levels on Blackhawk’s captain Jonathan Toews I am glad that my mom never would have let me play hockey. It’s a clean hit but it absolutely demolishes Toews who can’t pick up his stick, tries to skate to bench and can’t get a few feet without collapsing. Wow.

I love open ice hits.

21
Oct
09

Goalie Masks are the Coolest Part of Hockey

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Categories: Awesome and Hockey
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Ray Emery Mask50 years ago Montreal Canadiens goalie Jacques Plante was forced off the ice after a shot hit him in the face, requiring 7 stitches to stop the bleeding. He refused to retake the ice if his coach didn’t allow him to wear the small plastic mask he had made to protect himself. With no backup, his coach had no choice.

If I played hockey I’d want to be a goalie so I could have an artist friend make me an incredibly dope mask (I bet commenter the roomate would make a sick one), of course, I also have no desire for 100+ mph shots to come towards me so I probably wouldn’t make a very good goalie…

Regardless, the folks over at TSN put together a gallery of some of the best masks on the ice this season and are holding a poll to see which one is the fans’ favorite. Here are the ones I like best. Make sure to head over to TSN after to see the rest of the awesome masks and to vote in their poll as well. Some of this year’s entrants include pop culture shout-outs, including Metallica, Heath Ledger’s Joker and Rocky Balboa as well as homages to the various cities the goalies play in and the team’s mascots.

[TSN]

15
Oct
09

Con Man Scams Canadian Hockey-Playing Teens

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Categories: Douches and Hockey
Tags: , , , ,

51479829Probably no crime in Canada is more nefarious than the one Randy Grumbley of Ontario allegedly pulled off; he was arrested Thursday for creating a fake European hockey tournament in France and scamming dozens of Ontario teenagers out of nearly $3,500 each.

Using the alias Frances Poirier, police claim that Grumbley operated a company called Ontario Central Scouting and promised teens ages 16-21 the chance to play in a hockey tournament in Europe where professionals scouts would be in attendance. Police believe Grumbley recruited about 100 victims.

Each person paid approximately $2,800 plus travel costs but when they arrived in Colmar, France to play teams from France, Italy, Switzerland and Germany they instead discovered there was no hockey tournament or opposing teams. Jones!

Well, at least the teens got a fun trip to France right?

[Ottawa Citizen]

15
Oct
09

Wayne Gretzky Mixes and Mingles with Celebrities

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Awesome, Celebrities, Hockey and Pop Culture
Tags: , , , ,

When you’re nicknamed “The Great One” everyone wants to meet you, when you are a superstar in LA — even if it is in hockey — you get to meet tons of interesting celebrities. Via the Greatest Hockey Legends site comes some photos of Wayne Gretzky and some of the famous people he encountered along the way. People such as super-TV dad Alan Thicke and Rob Lowe, Penthouse Pet Carol Davies, the obligatory Gary Coleman shot and of course, Burt Reynolds. Neat!

thicke

[Greatest Hockey Legends]

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