Archive for November 7th, 2008


What is Offsides?

This video of John Cleese explaining offsides isn’t hilarious, but it’s amusing and frankly, I like John Cleese a LOT and so I’m putting it up. Hey, it’s my blog.


Reebok Swoops in on Nike’s Miscue

I bet you thought the story of Arien O’Connell, the school teacher who won but didn’t win, but then became “a” winner of the Nike Women’s Marathon in San Francisco was over, but guess what, it ain’t! Seeing how their rival company kept botching the story, and seeing an opportunity to make a little publicity of their own, Reebok stepped in yesterday and surprised O’Connell at her school presenting her with a special trophy, free shoes every month for a year, t-shirts for all her students and a $2,500 donation to her school. And just to stick it in Nike’s ass a little more, the inscription on the trophy read: “Winner and Heroine of Non-Elite Runners Everywhere.” Nicely done Reebok, you do a good thing and you get to piss off Nike. Well played.


Rangers Show How Classless They Are

Showing that they can be total capital “d” Douches, the New York Rangers are seeking the 17th pick in this year’s draft as compensation for not being able to sign their 2006 first round choice, also the 17th pick. The reason they were unable to sign Alexei Cherepanov? He’s the player who was tragically killed during an Russian hockey league game.

As Rangers assistant GM Cam Hope told the NY Post:

The question is with the one parenthetical phrase in Article 8.3 (b) that refers compensation for an unsigned first-round draft pick who is ‘… again eligible for the Entry Draft or becomes an Unrestricted Free Agent …’ That language was inserted to clarify that a team would be owed a compensatory pick even if they were to re-draft that player or sign him as a free agent.

It seems now as if that phrase is unintentionally precluding the deceased from being included as eligible for compensation. We understand that this is a sensitive issue, but with all due respect to Alexei’s family and his memory, he is technically eligible to be drafted again next year.

We are not attempting to capitalize on a tragedy, but there would be no question regarding the Rangers’ right to a compensatory pick if Cherepanov had been revived and survived the incident and were on life support.

If an unsigned player sustained a massive injury on or off the ice, the drafting team would get a compensatory pick,” Hope said. “We believe that the letter of the law applies in this case, but even if there is a disagreement on that, it’s clear that the spirit of the law applies.

Classy guys. SUPER Classy. This would be like the Celtics seeking a compensatory pick, in this year’s draft for Len Bias’ death. Sure, it’s only been 20 years, but c’mon, we’re owed the second pick in the draft!

I get that the Rangers are upset, sure, but c’mon this is just pathetic. Fuck you Glen Sather. Cherepanov’s death was unfortunate and sad, but don’t try and milk it to get something else, that’s just sick.


It’s All Academic

Here’s something you never hear in college sports, an athlete choosing academics over sports. Myron Rolle, a safety on FSU’s defense won’t be playing in Saturday’s game against Maryland, which could decide the ACC’s Atlantic Division because he has an interview in Birmingham, Alabama to become a Rhodes Scholar. Rolle, who has a GPA of 3.75 and wants to be a medical anthropologist (someone likes watching Bones!) thought that this situation might come up, but for him, there was no hesitation, “this is a priority to me and my family. This is something really special.”

FSU officials are being especially supportive of Rolle, even trying to switch the game time to an evening game so that, with a private plane he might be able to leave Birmingham and possibly make the game’s second half and still play. The school received a waiver from the NCAA for the private plane, with Athletic Director Randy Spetman saying, “It’s not a competitive advantage or disadvantage for the player. This is what the NCAA is here for, to help the student-athlete excel in both the classroom and on the athletic field.”

For once, that’s actually true. I may hate college sports, but now I officially like Myron Rolle. Go get ’em!

Follow The Slanch Report

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 19 other subscribers

Sign Our Petition!

The Slanch Report has started an online petition asking the MLB Network to air the Dock Ellis no-hitter he threw on June 12, 1970 against the San Diego Padres. The moment was a seminal piece of baseball history and is certainly worthy of being rerun.

Please join us in this cause and sign the petition below so we can all share in this special and fantastic moment of baseball history. THANKS!

November 2008