Archive for November 4th, 2008

04
Nov
08

Goodbye Sweet Meathook

Dmitri Young, MLB’s 2007 Comeback Player of the Year has been outrighted to the Washington Nationals’ AAA team in Syracuse today. Baseball without da Meathook just doesn’t make sense. Young, who has overcome being diagnosed with diabetes, as well as suffering through playing two seasons (well, parts of 2 seasons) for the Nationals deserves better. Having played for the Cardinals, Reds, Tigers and Nationals over 13 seasons Young’s teams have lost nearly 920 games over that time span, including 7 teams that have lost at least 89 games in a season. This to me is an outrage. If the Nationals are going to get serious about winning they should care more about their AAA team and not attach such a losing albatross around their neck. So long Dmitri, I’ll never forget heckling you during spring training. Vote Da Meathook in 2012!

04
Nov
08

Nascar Remains the Epitome of Class

So you’re sitting in your RV surrounded by the Texas Motor Speedway and an estimated crowd of 170,000 people trying to enjoy the spectacle of some rednecks driving around you at high speeds when all of a sudden, BAM! gunshot to the arm. Sounds like a fun Sunday! For one lucky fan at the Dickies 500 on Sunday that was exactly her day. The 62 year old woman, whose name has not been released, apparently didn’t appreciate the gift that she received, “She immediately (screamed), ‘I’ve been shot. I’ve been shot.’ She took off running out the door,” her son-in-law Bobby Cook told Dallas-Fort Worth television station KTVT. What, you can’t take a long-distance rifle round in the arm and walk it off? I thought Texans were tough. The woman was taken to the hospital and was reported to be in stable condition, something I hope to one day also achieve.

04
Nov
08

Marshawn Lynch Gets Us All Horny

With Brett Favre and the New York Jets in town, this week’s game was a big one for the Buffalo Bills to cement their place on top of the AFC East. The fans of Ralph Wilson Stadium were pumped up and emotions were running high. Of course, you know what happens when emotions run high, hormones start pumping. Hence the security officers responding to a disturbance in one of the ladies bathrooms during the game. In the stall? 29 year old Alicia Venneman and her 31 year old boyfriend Jeramy Kemper who were having sex. Ah, the cool crisp air of a Buffalo Sunday, the smell of brats and stale beer surrounding you and of course, the romance of a 35 year old stadium’s ladies bathroom, what better atmosphere could you want. Throw in the simple beauty of Marshawn Lynch’s grills and the handsomeness of Ralph Wilson and I’m impressed that Buffalo fans don’t ALL hump at the game. With raw animal magnetism like that being thrown around, I’d imagine that there should be thousands of new Bills fans in 9 months.

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