Archive for June 29th, 2008


A Wild and Crazy Night at Dodger Stadium

Generally when you go out and pitch a no-hitter, you can chalk that game up in the win column. For the erstwhile California Angels, that was not the case Saturday night. Jered Weaver pitched 6 innings of no-hit ball but was lifted in the 7th for a pinch hitter. Unfortunately, thanks to two back-to-back errors in the fifth (the first of which was somewhat questionably), Matt Kemp had scored on a sacrifice fly, making the score 1-0 in the favor of the Dodgers.

Thanks to the asinine NL lack of a DH, the Angels were forced in a one-run game to remove Weaver in order to try and generate some offense. If only his team had a player that they could have hit for Weaver and leave him in the lineup, someone whose sole job it was to hit, thus enabling the pitcher to concentrate on just his pitching. Sigh. Continue reading ‘A Wild and Crazy Night at Dodger Stadium’


The Spanish Have Mixed Up Priorities

The people of Europe are obsessed with soccer, with the Euro Cup games going on, productivity in workplaces was significantly down around the continent as people eagerly watched the games unfold. Even more disturbing, people were choosing watching the games over sex!

The International Erotic Film Festival of Barcelona, which confusingly was held in Madrid, annually averages over 50,000 people, ended this year’s three-day festival with a mere 15,000 attendees.

“FICEB director Juli Simon blamed the lower-than-expected turnout on the fact that the festival’s opening day coincided with Spain‘s 3-0 Euro 2008 semi-final win over Russia which drew a record Spanish television audience of 17 million. ‘Football is one of the few things that can compete with sex'” he explained in a television interview.

The festival featured “buxom” porn actresses on hand, screenings from nearly 60 film companies and even the taping of a new movie by director Pepe Catman, which involved some of the festival-goers in on the action.

Let’s hope that once the Euro Cup is over later today that the Spaniards, and the rest of Europe, can get back to the important things in life. After all, I wouldn’t want Pepe Catman to have to go out into the real world and get a job, I mean, I don’t imagine he’s got a lot of transferable skills…


Because Sports are All About the Balls Anyways

You know how you find yourself watching a Nascar or NHRA race and you’re always like, “Damn, this is truly the greatest thing in the world. If only I could somehow have my couch vibrate and shake me to simulate like I too was a driver on the track to make this even better…”

Well good news, introducing, the Buttkicker!

This weekend the NHRA Racing series is going to be installing a bluetooth receiver in the car of Jeg Coughlin Jr. (Jeg? Goddamn that’s a redneck name!) which will enable a viewer at home, using the Buttkicker, to feel exactly like they are riding in the car with Coughlin. The Buttkicker folk are hoping that they will be able to sell subscriptions in the future and add in a slew of other sporting event possibilities too.

After all, the chance to watch football and feel the tackle or feel a collision at the plate while making your balls tingle has always been the dream of any TRUE sports fan.

However, this might be the only way you can get your girlfriend to stay on the couch with you through the entire football season…

[Fan IQ via Engadget]


The Filthiest Thing I’ve Seen

Some folks in Scotland have turned the “beautiful game” into the dirtiest, wildest affair possible. I’d expect nothing less from men who wear skirts. This is the perfect combination of sport: mud wrestling and balls. It nearly brings a tear to my eyes…

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Actually, this looks like an incredibly fun time, albeit very very dirty. But hey, so you get your balls messy and then you wash ’em, t’ain’t nothing wrong with that!

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The Slanch Report has started an online petition asking the MLB Network to air the Dock Ellis no-hitter he threw on June 12, 1970 against the San Diego Padres. The moment was a seminal piece of baseball history and is certainly worthy of being rerun.

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June 2008