Archive Page 10

08
Dec
09

Hines Ward Shows a Bit of Hypocrisy

A few weeks back when Ben Roethlisberger was forced out of the Steelers lineup with concussion symptoms, his top receiver, Hines Ward questioned Ben’s toughness.

“I’ve lied to a couple of doctors saying ‘I’m straight, I feel good,’ when I knew I’m really not straight. But I don’t think guys really think about the future when they’re playing currently in the NFL,” Ward told Bob Costas, “Trust me, the players, they wanna go out there because these games, you don’t get back. You’re never gonna get this Baltimore-Pittsburgh game back.”

Fast forward to this week and coach Mike Tomlin’s announcement today that Ward is “very questionable” to play this Sunday.

I thought every game mattered Hines….

[NFL and NFL Fanhouse]

08
Dec
09

Kain Proves Himself Able

Kain Saul is an Australian freestyle motocross rider and a few weeks back he attempted something that had never been done before, a backflip using a Harley Davidson. Of course, an actual Harley bike is far too heavy to be flipped in the air and so with some help from a local Harley dealership they installed a giant Harley engine onto a motocross bike frame. Checking in at nearly 570 pounds the bike still retained plenty of that Harley heavy bike allure. All set, Saul gets the bike in place, engages the 100 HP engine and let’s her rip.

08
Dec
09

Derek Jeter Gets a Girl Fired

Back in town, at least for the moment, Derek Jeter the other night decided to order in some food from one of his favorite restaurants, Nino’s Positano right around the corner from his apartment. After taking the order over the phone, the hostess at the eatery was extremely excited at having spoken with the Yankees captain.

She even convinced the delivery guy to let her go with him on the order; although he made her promise to stay outside the building. When they arrived there though, she grabbed the food and tried to bring it up herself. After trying to charm the doorman and yelling out that she was “Derek’s #1 fan!” the doorman escorted her out of the building, taking the food up to Jeter himself.

When Nino found out about the incident he wasted no time and had the hostess fired. Showing himself a man of the enlightenment, Nino told the NY Post, “I’ll take Jeter over that bimbo any day.”

[NY Post]

08
Dec
09

Surf is Up in Hawaii, C’mon Down

Surfers from around the world have been making their way to the North Shore of Oahu, Hawaii in the hopes of competing in the Quicksilver in Memory of Eddie Aikau event, which hasn’t been held since 2004. The event is only held in perfect conditions, and requires waves to be at a minimum of 40 feet high. With record surfs, this might be the year to resurrect the competition and so hundreds of top surfers from around the globe have been flying in to Hawaii. While the contest hasn’t officially started that hasn’t stopped everyone from getting out on the waves and letting loose.

And I have another very aesthetically pleasing surfing post coming later today that will knock your socks off.

*(UPDATE)* The Quicksilver will start today at 10:00 PST

[Daily Mail]

08
Dec
09

McEnroe’s Blazes New Trails

There is nothing more infuriating then when one goes to a meeting to talk about marijuana reform held at a restaurant in the W Hotel in Miami only to have someone spark up a joint in the middle of the meeting. But that’s EXACTLY what happened the other night when art dealer Vito Schnabel held a fact-finding meeting. Failed talk AND game-show host John McEnroe and his rocking wife Patty Smyth were the sparks behind the loose joint and were apparently indifferent to the fact that blazing a j is generally frowned upon in hotel lobbies.

“They were talking about grass reforms and the next thing you know they were lighting up,” laughs an attendee. “No one seemed to mind, though.”

[NY Post]

08
Dec
09

Mark Cuban Gets Tossed Through a Table

Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban stopped by WWE’s Monday Night Raw last night as the guest host, in a shocking development, his night was not limited just to hosting duties. When the unnecessarily enraged Sheamus was in the ring with Cuban he just couldn’t help himself. First Cuban takes a knee to the groin (something I’m sure that delighted NBA commissioner David Stern) and then found himself picked up by the fiery(crotched) Sheamus and then thrown through a table. Pretty standard Monday night for a billionaire.

I just hope Cuban learned his lesson, NEVER TRUST A GINGER, us redheads be dangerous and easily roused to anger. You’ve been warned.

08
Dec
09

Jesus Saves (Old Betting Slips and Makes $45K a Year)

In 1999, Jesus Leonardo placed a bet at an OTB window in Manhattan, when the race was over he had lost and threw the ticket on the floor in disgust. But then, all of a sudden there was announced that there was an inquiry and soon the results were changed; now he was a winner, $900 to be exact. Alas, he’d already tossed the ticket into the garbage, and after fruitlessly searching for it, couldn’t find the winning ticket. Despite tearfully pleading with the manager, Leonardo was told there was nothing that could be done. However, the manager suggested that if he wanted to take the trash home and look through it, he was welcome to do so.

Taking her up on the offer, Leonardo took the bag home. He never found his winning $900, but did find 2 other tickets worth a combined $2,000. Ever since he’s been a stooper — “a person who hangs around racetracks and betting parlors picking up tickets thrown away by others.”

“This has become my job, my life,” he said. “This is how I feed my family.”

On average Leonardo makes anywhere from $100 – $300 a day, feeding ticket after ticket into the scanners looking for winners. With the help of some friends, he has branched his operations out, getting the garbage from 5 OTB locations which he then digs through on the lookout for lost treasure. Leonardo says that he makes on average over $45,000 a year, which he pays taxes on. Back in 2006 he had his best single ticket finding a Pick 4 that someone had tossed worth $9,500, not too shabby. According to the New York State Racing and Wagering Board nearly $8.5 million in racing bets go unclaimed each year, meaning that Leonardo is only getting a small slice of the larger pie.

“At first, my wife thought I was crazy, but then she realized I was finding a lot of money in winning tickets, sometimes $200 a day,” he said. “After a while, she didn’t think I was so crazy.”

[NY Times]

07
Dec
09

Get Out of Kris Humphries’ House

If you’re a rookie and looking to make a good impression in the NBA, take some helpful pointers from Dallas’ Kris Humphries who has thrown some ferocious blocks down already in this young season. The latest was in Friday’s contest against Memphis when Sam Young went up for a dunk only to be shot down by Humphries. Corralling the loose ball after the block, Young goes in AGAIN for a dunk and misses it AGAIN, with the ball falling to Humphries who was on the floor.

07
Dec
09

Smoking Kills (2 Grandmasters’ Chances in Tournament)

We all know the allure of smoking cigarettes, they make you look cooler, older, tougher, more popular, etc, but who knew that there are BAD things to them too! At the World Chess Cup in sunny Khanty Mansiysk, Russia, two Chinese grandmasters Wang Yue (left) and Li Chao, were disqualified from their third-round matches after showing up late. Their excuse? They were out back smoking.

Wang told an interviewer later that he understood the tournament’s decision but didn’t think it was particularly fair. The biggest victim of all was Li who only started smoking in order to keep Wang company during the tournament, which should be a lesson to all you potential smokers out there; if you’re going to start smoking make sure it’s for a good reason, like impressing cute older girls.

When he was asked if this incident would push Wang to quit smoking he had this response: “I don’t think so. After such a shock, you only think to take a long smoke.” Grandmaster indeed.

[NY Times]

07
Dec
09

US Curling Has Their Own Brand of Condoms — FINALLY!

With most Winter Olympics sports far below the radar of the general population, the various sporting organizations sometimes have to go to creative lengths to try and procure adequate funding, case in point, the US Curling team are selling their own specially branded condoms.

Called the “Hurry Hard condoms”, after a phrase that curlers constantly yell out to one another the idea came about when the team was trying to figure out ways to raise some cash for their team and someone joked about a hurry hard condom. Eventually everyone came around on the idea and the idea was fully germinated.

Proceeds for the condoms will be split between USA Curling and Central Coast HIV/AIDS Services with primary team sponsor Kodiak contributing some money into the fabrication of the special love coats.

“The platform that USA Curling can leverage is the Olympic exposure and excitement around the Olympics,” said Rick Patzke, USA Curling’s chief operating officer. “I’m sure it’ll bring more fodder for talk shows and things like that. But it will bring attention to the central message, which is safety and education and awareness for safer sex and HIV prevention.”

[CBC]

07
Dec
09

Someone Get Joey Porter a Stylist

For Joey Porter it’s a good thing that the Dolphins beat the Patriots yesterday because otherwise he would have looked like an even bigger douche. The first contest between these two teams featured plenty of jawing from Porter before the game, and then little from him DURING it. In fact he finished the day with no tackles, no sacks and nothing on the stat sheet, something the stadium scoreboard operators thought important enough to point out.

Where in the first game he was totally invisible, yesterday he actually contributed, sort of, finishing with 3 tackles and assisting on another one. After yesterday’s surprise win over the Patriots, Porter held court in the locker room with reporters and this time he was highly visible, if incredibly poorly dressed.

Hey Joey, guess what, you’re a well-paid professional football player, NOT a soldier. You want to be a soldier? Great, go sign up like Pat Tillman did. Otherwise, buy some normal clothes that help you not look like quite as much of an enormous douchenozzle. Also, last I checked, there’s not a whole lot of forests in the Miami area, so, what exactly are you trying to camouflage yourself from, I mean, I can still see you for the tool you are.

[Boston Globe]

07
Dec
09

Al Michaels — Master of the English Language

Jared Allen is a nearly unstoppable defensive force, we saw his power last week when he ran roughshod over whoever was put in place to block him. Allen wears number 69 because you know, being a middle schooler forever is important, was continuing to be disruptive during last night’s contest against the Cardinals and Al Michaels figured it was an opportune moment to teach the kids about mutual oral love.

I mean, he’s right, but it just seemed a weird thing to bring up in the middle of a football game. Must have been weighing on his mind or something…

Then, when EJ Henderson breaks his leg in a decently gruesome manner, Al who must not own a thesaurus can’t stop from saying break. Whether it’s an “unfortunate break” or a “rough break” or it’s time for a commercial and so NBC will take “a break,” it’s time for Al to learn some new words.

[Sports Rubbish]




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