Archive for the 'Television' Category



29
Jul
08

I Swear I Thought I Saw A Nickel on the Ground

Heidi Watney joined the NESN Red Sox broadcast team in late April and has since become something of a crowd favorite, mostly because she is a former beauty queen who is easy on the eyes and is genuinely interested in sports. The fine gents over at Red Sox Monster have an item today about a new fan-site for Heidi, which is all well and good, but is not the only Watney related place online. For example, flickr is rife with photos of her and some are especially interesting. Take for instance this one, entitled “Why cameramen love their jobs.”

Heidi isn’t up to Erin Andrews levels of fanboys yet, or even Hazel Mae, but a bit longer in the Boston market and she could be. In the meantime, let’s hope that the fan-sites thrive and we get some chances to appreciate her fine work.

29
Jul
08

Sad Day For America

Pro Football Talk has the news that ESPN has chosen to remove Emmitt Smith from their Sunday NFL Countdown and America is the worse off for it.

Sure, Emmitt is a terrible commentator, he often seems totally lost, mispronounces or misidentifies players constantly, makes up words and generally says inane and uninteresting comments, but… wait, no this is all a good thing, there is no but.

Smith will still be a part of the 27-hour coverage of Monday Night Football (along with Trent Dilfer, yikes!) but his place on the Sunday Countdown will be taken by Cris Carter.

Here’s the official ESPN announcement:

Former All Pro wide receiver Cris Carter has been named an analyst for Sunday NFL Countdown (11 a.m. ET) and Monday Night Countdown (7 p.m.), ESPN’s popular NFL pre-game studio shows. In addition, Emmitt Smith will move this fall from Sunday NFL Countdown to the new expanded Sunday morning editions of SportsCenter (8 a.m. and 10 a.m.) where he will offer insight and analysis during NFL segments. Smith will also continue to travel to the Monday Night Football game site each week for Monday Night Countdown.

[Pro Football Talk via Awful Announcing]

21
Jul
08

Everybody Get Your Nipples Oiled and Ready!

In an extremely rare moment of government, the right thing was actually done earlier today. A federal appears court in Philadelphia today threw out the $550,000 indecency fine that the FCC leveled against CBS from the 2004 Super Bowl halftime show.

For once, reason and common sense came out, I for one am shocked, I’m worried this might be a sign of the coming apocalypse. The three-judge panel determined that the FCC “acted arbitrarily and capriciously” for issuing a fine for the brief image of Janet Jackson’s nipple ring.

The ruling found that the FCC abandoned its 30-year practice of fining broadcasters only when it was “pervasive as to amount to ‘shock treatment’ for the audience. Like any agency, the FCC may change its policies without judicial second-guessing. But it cannot change a well-established course of action without supplying notice of and a reasoned explanation for its policy departure.”

This means that the Republican FCC can no longer capriciously decide for the rest of America when something is offensive. The ruling shows that the government overreacted, of course, since the networks got so scared by the fine in the first place, it is probably already too late, the damage has been done. Now there is no such thing as live television anymore, with everything on a delay just in case a scary stray nipple makes an appearance. So it goes I suppose, but at least the right thing was done today, I guess after 7.5 years the government had to do SOMETHING right, I mean, sheer probability would dictate that…

Stick around after the jump for the NSFW image that launched the hooplah in the first place. Continue reading ‘Everybody Get Your Nipples Oiled and Ready!’

17
Jul
08

SNUBBED!

The Emmy nominations are in and the fact that The Wire didn’t receive even a single nomination for anything is one of the biggest pieces of Hollywood bullshit ever.

Really, you’re saying that Kyra Sedgewick and The Closer are a better show? Who the fuck even watches that?

While I’m psyched about the comedy noms for The Office and 30 Rock, that The Wire was overlooked is an embarrassment to whomever it is that comes up with these nominations and I hope they get crotch rot.

Also, I wonder if Jerry Seinfeld feels dissed since pretty much every other guest star on 30 Rock got an Emmy nomination but him…

17
Jul
08

Jerry Manuel Gets Grilled

Mets manager Jerry Manuel spoke with CBS 2 in New York the other day, and since local news is so damned schlocky, they needed a nice hook, how about Jerry getting interviewed by his daughter, Natalie, who is working as an intern at CBS this summer (I wonder how she got that job…)

I thought Manuel’s response when asked if the interim title bothered him was great, saying “I really disregard the title. I think even when you have a contract you’re interim.”

Fast forward to about 1:30 to see Manuel’s cute daughter asking her daddy about discipline.

Vodpod videos no longer available.
15
Jul
08

NY Fans Remain the Absolute Classiest

With the All Star game in Yankee Stadium, and everyone in the media falling over themselves to wax poetic about the stadium and the Yankees, the fans in the stadium are doing their part to show why they’re douchebags.

Last night when Chase Utley was introduced he was lustily booed, now granted it was likely Mets fans that were booing him, but fuck it, they’re all from New York, and it was still stupid. Here’s Chase’s reaction to getting booed. Don’t worry ChUtley, you’re still totally boss in my book, now keep cranking those homers for my fantasy team.

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Last night’s Home Run Derby was some kind of cruel endurance test as ESPN put Joe Morgan and Chris Berman together as the announcers. I’m pretty sure that can be considered torture under the American Code of Military Justice. I hope they had the TVs tuned in over at Guantanamo. All I know is that after the pure analysis Joe provided, plus my ears ringing from “BACK BACK BACK, it falls just beyond the infield,” that I came super close to stabbing a screwdriver into my ear canals.


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Continue reading ‘NY Fans Remain the Absolute Classiest’

11
Jul
08

Titletown Has Finally Been Worth it

Titletown is one of the most uninteresting segments ESPN has done this side of “Who’s Now,” but the other day, while supporting Gainesville’s chances to arbitrarily be dubbed “Titletown,” Erin Andrews did her best Gene Simmons impression.

I know what sports fans will be dreaming about tonight…


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09
Jul
08

Friday Night Lights Cuts Street and Smash

Friday Night Lights had one of the greatest first seasons in television. The show was awesome, every episode felt real and earned, and other than that every time the team won they did so in incredible fashion, it had nearly no flaws. The second season was a disappointment, with NBC execs meddling and trying to change the show into some Gossip Girl shlock that simply didn’t fit with the show’s vibe. Fortunately the show was saved, and will return for a 3rd season in the fall and until it proves it no longer is good, I am counting on you out there to watch it, so that I may continue watching it.

Alas, according to Entertainment Weekly, the show will be returning without two of it’s stars and more compelling characters, Jason Street and Smash Williams. Street was the star quarterback who was paralyzed in the first episode and Smash was the star, cocky running back. Sure, Tim Riggins will return to drink and chase chicks, and for that I am thankful, but the loss of Jason Street, whose subplot was one of the most compelling on the show, and the large personality of Smash will be sorely missed. Both characters will apparently be given 4 episode arcs to close their stories which is nice, but means that the show better find some suitable replacements. I just hope they don’t do some stupid casting and just remake the characters with new younger actors.

Season 3 will be on a short leash for me, if the show returns to it’s beginnings and takes away the teeny-bopper crap, then it should be just as good as ever, after all, all the Taylors are returning…

Also fortunate, the show is retaining it’s most important assets, the fine trio of Amy Teagarden, Minka Kelly and Adrian Palicki:

02
Jun
08

3 Items of Note from the 6th

Last night’s Mets/Dodgers scrum on ESPN was a semi-interesting game, with the Mets showing some signs of life and making a giant leap from where they were last Sunday when rumors swirled that Willie Randolph was about to be axed. During the 6th inning though there were several interesting things of note that came onto the screen, and being a helpful little beaver, I’ve documented them for you.

First, the broadcast showed Kent Desormeaux, the jockey for Big Brown, notice the woman with him.

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There is something about her that is slightly off. I think it’s her Sarah Jessica Parker look, and of course we all know that SJP has that horshish look to her. Remember?

All of which means that Kent Desormeaux, a tinyish gentleman who rides equines for a living seems to bring his work home to the bedroom. I hope this is not an isolated incident though. In my dreams all jockeys date horse-like women. Also before every race they all sing Oompah-Loompa songs together.

Then, I looked over Jose Reyes’ shoulder while he stood at the plate and noticed someone in the crowd who looked awfully familiar.

Continue reading ‘3 Items of Note from the 6th’

24
Apr
08

An Idea to Make Baseball Better

Nationals Marlins Baseball

You’ve seen it at every Marlins home game. Same with the Pazuzu Rays or most Dodgers games. Nationals games definitely have the same issue; empty seats all over the stadium. There is nothing more pathetic than watching a game and seeing whole sections with no one in them, and no section is worse with constantly empty seats than the area behind home plate. Now, bad teams–although the Rays are on the upswing and the Dodgers should be good but their fans are generally some of the lamest possible–are always going to have trouble selling seats, I get that, but it would seem to me that there would be some inherent advantages in making it seem like more people are at the game.

There is probably no single shot used in a baseball game more than that of the center field camera focusing in on the plate, it’s probably used 200+ times per game. Wouldn’t there be some inherent value for the teams to at least pad their broadcast a little by making it SEEM like there are more people actually at the game?

I understand that for baseball teams the money generated by the seats behind home plate and around the dugouts can be enormous, but here’s something I don’t understand. If there is no one in those seats by the end of the first couple of innings why not have staff move around the stadium and offer those seats to the other fans that are spread out across the stadium. The premium seats are either sold and no one showed up or remain unsold and would be otherwise empty, so why not fill them up? Sure, some fans will be more than happy to stay in the upper decks or whateves, but most will jump at the opportunity to get closer to the action. For many fans, it would probably be the closest they’ve ever sat to the game and would be a forever memorable occasion.

What good does it do to keep those seats empty the entire game? The team wouldn’t be losing money because those seats are going to remain unsold or unused regardless and the fans that would be offered the seats would have already paid for their initial tickets. Furthermore, the amount of positive PR this would acquire could only serve to help the team that did this. If I knew that every time I went to a game that there was a chance I could be upgraded for free to a premium seat why wouldn’t I try and go as much as possible and take advantage of such an opportunity?

Now some of these seats include drink and food service, I could see that this might cause a financial loss for the team, so, solution, make server service unavailable for those who are upgraded and didn’t actually pay for the premium amenities. The game alone from that close would be special enough and I can’t imagine fans wouldn’t be cooperative or understanding.

Not only will some goodwill be earned with the fans who are supportive enough to keep coming to otherwise empty stadiums but it will spread out exponentially. As fans tune into the games or see recaps they will see that shot of home plate again and again, if they see lots of people in the seats the assumption would be that the team is more popular and might entice those important casual fans to make a few more trips to the stadium. Again, if those same fans knew there was a decent chance they would get a chance to sit in such incredible seats they would be even more likely to return several times.

In addition, the national media, ESPN, et al would eat this story up. Big rich company gives back to the little guy? Sounds to me like some really great PR for whatever team decides to employ such a strategy (or employs the brilliant guy who thought up said strategy…)

Continue reading ‘An Idea to Make Baseball Better’

22
Apr
08

Maybe Not One for Milton Bradley’s Hall of Fame Audition

I understand that Milton Bradley is a significantly better athlete than I am, he is capable of agility and grace, and that he has accomplished many things at the major league level. However, Monday was not one of those outings.

Embarassing! I wonder what his competitors would say sarcastically to him after such a misplay…

I can just watch that over and over and over, it’s hilarious to me. And I do agree with Buck Showalter, it does indeed look bad. He just crumples in abject horror, justifiably so, scorched cow skin raining randomly from the sky, that’s something most people would want nothing to do with. (On a tangential note, I’m glad to see Buck Showalter back on Baseball Tonight, he gives much better analysis than any other manager they’ve had on recently and was missed.)

That was not all for the bizarre outfield plays this Monday, secret pen-pals Corey Hart and Ryan Ludwick combined together to make two of the stranger plays of the evening. First, there was Corey Hart going for an easy liner off the white-hot bat of Ludwick,

now, to be fair, Corey did just miss a great catch and then banged into the wall pretty hard earlier in the game, so while he should have caught this ball, I’m not going to hold it totally against him for being uneasy about the wall again.

But wait, there’s more! Ryan Ludwick felt bad, he didn’t want to have Hart go home feeling bad about himself, he just knew it would be reflected in an angry IM message later, so he figured he’d do a little something to put the hop back into Corey’s step. With Corey at bat Ludwick charged in on a dropping liner and–

Indeed that is nasty. Strange day out here at Windswept fields

ed. to add:

Great, so MLB took down the videos. Sweet, thanks MLB. I can see why you’d want to take down any ways for the fans to possibly enjoy the game outside of MLB.com. After all, why utilize the millions of users on Youtube, I mean, they don’t matter at all right. Sigh. I’ll try and see about getting them back up. Blame MLB.

I apologize for the shitty screengrabs but they’re the best I can do… it kinda works…

10
Apr
08

It’s Likely Keith Hernandez is Insane

Keith Hernandez was in rare form last night; the early miscues by the Phillies in the first three innings led to some sloppy baseball and he went from jabbering to jabbering completely incoherently. But all that is normal. I’m used to that Keith. I love that Keith. What was abnormal was his outfit. Is it just me or is he dressed like some miserly banker in a Dickens play?

“P.F. Pennypincher here, now give me the orphans’ money or I’ll call the gendarmes.”




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