Ray Moon is the world’s oldest bodybuilder at 80 years old. The octogenarian has gone through polio, cardiac arrest, open heart surgery, twisted bowels, multiple strokes, has a pacemaker and goddamn is he sexy. Feast your eyes on this piece of meat ladies! I don’t know about everyone else, but I’m reexamining my sexuality right now.
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This video has simply too many amazing things going on within it, it’s hard to believe that it is from an actual newscast. First off, the topic is that these women are starting a petition to have pole dancing added to the gymnastic events in the Olympics. OK, that seems strange, but I’m willing to agree that skilled pole dancing does have many impressive gymnastic elements so that’s not ridiculous. Then there is the fact that this newscast is from Utah, the official state of boring people. When was the last time pole dancing and Utah were in the same sentence, let alone in a POSITIVE news story?
Follow that with one of the co-owners of the studio in her giant stripper heels saying that the shoes are only for building strength, “[they] really help my calves get stronger…” she says, ALMOST with a straight face. Meanwhile the video features a lady in fishnets upside down slithering on the pole. Yeah, NOTHING to do with strippers. Throw in the Mormon housewives in the class and this video simply has everything you could ever ask for. And then, just to top off the unintentional comedy in this video, the petition has 300 signatures! 300! And they are trying to become an Olympic sport! I’m not a member of the Olympic Committee, however, I feel safe in saying that you’ll need significantly more than 300 people in UTAH to become an official Olympic sport.
[FAN IQ]
From the Denver Nuggets game the other day, comes this video (via FAN IQ) of one of the Nuggets dancers (Bridget) while the telecast comes out of commercial. There’s something hypnotic about it, particularly in slow motion, that clearly also distracted the announcers. Listen as they start talking and then for some reason get completely off-track and go silent for a few moments. I wonder why. Maybe their nachos just got delivered at that moment. Yeah, that’s gotta be it. Looks like it was quite an exciting basketball game!
Kids grow up too fast these days, take this video of a little girl who is already about 100 times better than me at basketball. It is simply unfair that this girl would probably WRECK me out on the court. Sigh.
Dustin Pedroia did it! In his first year he gets the Rookie of the Year, in his second he adds a Gold Glove, a Silver Slugger AND the MVP. That’s a hell of a way to start a career for a guy who is the same size as me. When you think about how the initial comparisons to Pedroia when he was drafted was a slightly better David Eckstein (mostly because he was a small scrappy white guy) to where he is today, pretty damn impressive. Beyond the stats, which were impressive, watching him play every day is a delight, Pedroia is the tough as nails guy that we all know who goes all out in everything he does and somehow succeeds despite never being the best. When the Red Sox needed him, Pedroia carried the team, hitting a ridiculous .350/.398/.485 for July and then, when the team needed offense after the trade of Manny Ramirez, Pedroia hit a RIDICULOUS .374/.425/.635 with an OPS+ of 177(!) in August. Wow. The only thing I simply don’t understand is that one of the writers somehow didn’t list Pedroia on his ballot AT ALL. OK, you don’t think he’s the MVP, fine, but you’re saying that he’s not even on the BALLOT? That’s ridiculous. According to WEEI and Lou Merloni, the writer who left him off the ballot was Evan Grant from the Dallas Morning News is the guy who didn’t list him. WTF? UPDATE: The Boston Globe confirmed that it was Grant who left him off, and he responded with his reasoning, most of which is lame, but at least he knows what OPS is, so that’s something…
With the possible departure of Jason Varitek, I wouldn’t be surprised to see Pedroia, despite only being a big leaguer for 2 years become the next captain of the Red Sox. Also, for fun comparison sake, after the jump the last Red Sox MVP.
England being so dull and boring, some adventurous kayakers went by a 300 foot high dam in Wales and decided that, yup, they needed to go down it. So, courtesy of the BBC here are some strangely really small images of them doing it. Looks simultaneously awesome and terrifying.
[BBC]
Fresh off the first championship in World Baseball Classic history, Japan is ready to come back and dominate once more. To that end, the team’s officials have named the team “Samurai Japan,” Ryozo Kato, the commissioner of Japanese professional baseball said “It’s a name that we know our fans will appreciate.” The team, expected to comprise current MLB stars like Ichiro and Daisuke Matsuzaka as well as Japanese league stars should contend for the title once more. I would expect nothing less from a team with a fiery personality like Ichiro on board. Anyone who says things like “I hope he [Matsuzaka] arouses the fire that’s dormant in the innermost recesses of my soul,” as Ichiro did during the season is an OK leader in my book. Also, when you can have someone who can unleash a stream of obscene invectives as your captain, you’re in good shape.
I bet you thought the story of Arien O’Connell, the school teacher who won but didn’t win, but then became “a” winner of the Nike Women’s Marathon in San Francisco was over, but guess what, it ain’t! Seeing how their rival company kept botching the story, and seeing an opportunity to make a little publicity of their own, Reebok stepped in yesterday and surprised O’Connell at her school presenting her with a special trophy, free shoes every month for a year, t-shirts for all her students and a $2,500 donation to her school. And just to stick it in Nike’s ass a little more, the inscription on the trophy read: “Winner and Heroine of Non-Elite Runners Everywhere.” Nicely done Reebok, you do a good thing and you get to piss off Nike. Well played.
Here’s something you never hear in college sports, an athlete choosing academics over sports. Myron Rolle, a safety on FSU’s defense won’t be playing in Saturday’s game against Maryland, which could decide the ACC’s Atlantic Division because he has an interview in Birmingham, Alabama to become a Rhodes Scholar. Rolle, who has a GPA of 3.75 and wants to be a medical anthropologist (someone likes watching Bones!) thought that this situation might come up, but for him, there was no hesitation, “this is a priority to me and my family. This is something really special.”
FSU officials are being especially supportive of Rolle, even trying to switch the game time to an evening game so that, with a private plane he might be able to leave Birmingham and possibly make the game’s second half and still play. The school received a waiver from the NCAA for the private plane, with Athletic Director Randy Spetman saying, “It’s not a competitive advantage or disadvantage for the player. This is what the NCAA is here for, to help the student-athlete excel in both the classroom and on the athletic field.”
For once, that’s actually true. I may hate college sports, but now I officially like Myron Rolle. Go get ’em!
In a tradition that I can completely get behind, the senior cheerleaders at South Delta Secondary School in British Columbia, Canada every year at the final football game streak the field. With the Delta Sun Devils opposing the Lord Tweedsmuir Panthers of Lord Tweedsmuir Secondary School the senior girls streaked across the field, most wearing thongs and strategically placed duct tape and spraying silly string on their opponents. The Panthers were unable to regain their composure, ending up losing the game 20-14.
Ted Johnson, the school’s principal was less than enthused, having warned the girls not to do it beforehand, although that clearly didn’t work. As punishment for their disobedience, the principal has told the girls that if they do anything else bad they will be suspended, but otherwise are not in trouble. “Our position is one that we don’t celebrate this. We don’t find it funny,” he said. “We don’t take it lightly. This is a school. [In] schools, we hold higher ideals than we do in, say, the mall.” Let’s all take to the malls!
The students took obviously quite a different view of their prank. “It’s just kind of like a fun [graduation] prank for our year, and it’s been going on for a couple of years now,” said one of the girls, who wanted to be identified only as Rochelle. “It was pretty much out of fun.” I’ll say. Thanks Canadia!
Michael Irvin is a blowhard, his opinion is generally useless but I find myself sharing the same sentiments of the folk over at Awful Announcing that Irvin was strangely and surprisingly very eloquent in describing his reaction to last night’s election. Take it away Michael:
What a historical moment that was last night. … From an African-American standpoint, I watched my people — watched my people — celebrate the not guilty verdict of O.J. Simpson. They were so hungry for a victory of some kind that they celebrated — we celebrated — the verdict of O.J. And I was thinking to myself, ‘Two people are dead. Two people are dead’ Now, I’m not talking about my people, I’m explaining them here. They were just so hungry to say ‘We have a victory.’ And I cringe when I even think about that.
But last night I watched a celebration. A real celebration. A real celebration, and it was a celebration for everybody, and everybody celebrated, and they kept showing this shot, and I was watching, of this little black girl and this little white girl, just sitting there crying together, and I thought, wow. I thought about Martin Luther King and his ‘I Have a Dream’ speech, and I thought about him saying, black kids and white kids playing together. …
Last night we removed all differences and became just one, and I thought that was a beautiful thing. It was just a beautiful thing. I stood here with my kids, we watched it and we cried and we prayed.
Well said sir. For one day I’ll heed your opinions.
The Slanch Report has started an online petition asking the MLB Network to air the Dock Ellis no-hitter he threw on June 12, 1970 against the San Diego Padres. The moment was a seminal piece of baseball history and is certainly worthy of being rerun.
Please join us in this cause and sign the petition below so we can all share in this special and fantastic moment of baseball history. THANKS!
SIGN THE PETITION HERE! AND PLEASE TELL YOUR FRIENDS AND PASS THIS ALONG!
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