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15
May
09

Would You Buy a House From This Guy?

dougie1Once deserving of a police escort from the airport in order to arrive at Fenway on time; Doug Mirabelli was pushed into retirement after the Red Sox jettisoned him last spring training. Now the career backup catcher has moved onto a new career: selling real estate.

Doug Mirabelli has joined Coldwell Banker Schmidt Realtors as a full-time sales associate working out of the 522 East Front Street office. Prior to joining Coldwell Banker Schmidt Realtors, Mirabelli played professional Baseball, winning two World Series with the Boston Red Sox. A native of Las Vegas, Nevada, Mirabelli met his now wife, Kristin while both were attending Wichita State, where she was an All-American Softball Player. They have been residents of Traverse City for the past 5 years, and have three children. Having passed his real estate exam and joined the Traverse Area Association of REALTORS, Mirabelli is now engaging in an entirely different version of spring training than in years past, namely the extensive training that Coldwell Banker Schmidt Realtors requires of all its new sales associates. Mirabelli expects that his real estate career will allow him to support the youth of the region, and plans to direct a portion of his earnings toward funding his Catch Em All Foundation, which focuses on increasing youth opportunities in the Grand Traverse area. “We’re happy to have Doug Mirabelli join our company,” said Ken Schmidt, CEO of Coldwell Banker Schmidt Realtors. “He obviously has a drive to succeed and a willingness to work hard to achieve his goals.” Schmidt first contacted Mirabelli after he retired from baseball, having noted the success that other professional athletes had achieved working with other Coldwell Banker Brokers around the country.

I can’t think of a better market to get into than REAL ESTATE during a huge recession where no one has the money to get a loan and I can’t think of a better place to sell said real estate than Michigan, a state where NO one has ANY money. The market there has to be HUGE!

If you were wondering whether or not to make Doug your real estate agent, he has this convincing bit up on his profile:

Professional Background

I have had an outstanding history of success in my former career as a professinal athlete. I now plan on leveraging my hard work ethic and success for my former athletic teams to my new “team” – my clients in real estate.

While I’ll agree that he was on TEAMS with a history of success, when you retire with a career OPS+ of 86 after 12 seasons I don’t think that can be considered either “outstanding” or “success.”

[Coldwell Banker Brokers via Barstool Sports]

15
May
09

Not the Danger I’d Expect from the Pfister

Copy of ghostsThe Florida Marlins finished out their series against the Milwaukee Brewers yesterday, and at least a couple players couldn’t be happier to get out of the Brew City. At least two pairs of Marlins players were sharing rooms at their hotel because of their fear of ghosts. It seems that the Marlins are staying at the Pfister Hotel in downtown Milwaukee, the high class hotel is also famous for ghost sightings and other paranormal activity. Reportedly, the most popular sighting is of the hotel’s founder, Charles Pfister overlooking the lobby from the grand staircase.

The Marlins’ Josh Johnson and Dan Meyer had separate but adjoining rooms. “Every time there was a noise, JJ would yell, ‘It’s the ghosts,'” Meyer said.

“I heard a couple of noises,” Chris Volstad said with a laugh, “but I just closed my eyes.”

The Marlins aren’t the only ones to experience something scary while staying at the lovely Pfister. When he was with the Dodgers, Adrian Beltre reportedly was so scared he would sleep with a baseball bat in his bed just in case a specter came after him (the Dodgers no longer stay at the Pfister.) Last June the Twins’ Carlos Gomez got scared when his iPod, sitting on a table kept vibrating, despite Gomez turning it off several times. Sounds SPOOKY!

The players should be thankful that the ghosts of the Pfister don’t do something much much worse.

[Palm Beach Post]

15
May
09

In this Case the Injury Came AFTER the Egg

broadfoot_174319tBecause athletes never cease to injure themselves in unique and interesting manners, here is the latest bizarre injury from the world of soccer. Kirk Broadstreet, who plays for Rangers in the Scottish Premier League was treated at a hospital on Sunday after an egg exploded in his face. It seems that Broadstreet was inspecting one of the two eggs he was poaching in the microwave when it blew up, throwing scalding water at his face.

Rangers manager Walter Smith said: “He’s got some facial burns but he should be okay.”

This is why I never eat eggs.

[The Independent]

15
May
09

He Did What?

pedroiafireNow I’m the last person to be criticizing people about grammar, but then I’m not a professional journalist-type. When I read this sentence from MLB.com’s recap of yesterday’s frustrating Red Sox loss against the Angels I, for one, find it a bit confusing:

“Pedroia, who had caught fire before the injury, was glad the momentum seemed to carry over.”

Uh. What? I thought Pedroia’s injury was to his groin, did someone light his groin on fire? I’m confused. How was this not more reported, last year’s MVP catches FIRE and NO one talks about it? That seems strange. However, it’s impressive that he bounced back so quickly…

[MLB]

15
May
09

UGH

Yesterday was a terrible day to be a Boston sports fan. I’m most upset about the Bruins, not only did they lose game 7, but they lost it in sudden-death overtime to Scott Walker who had delivered an awful cheap shot to Aaron Ward and should have been suspended for game 6. I really thought this was the Bruins’ year. I should have known better. This is what they do. This is why I stopped caring about hockey for so long; rooting for the Bruins is like being a Cubs fan.

14
May
09

Let’s Go BRUINS!

[Barstool Sport]

14
May
09

Jeremy Piven Dislikes Detroit

I’m calling a Bruins/Blackhawks Stanley Cup finals. Obviously, Bruins win.

14
May
09

Fenway Not Being So Friendly

Brian Rossi (left) used to be a middle school gym teacher in Worcester, MA until he got arrested for possessing child pornography; apparently that makes his job something of a problem. He’s currently under house arrest and wears an electronic tracking monitor at all times. Rossi was only allowed to leave the house for court-approved medical or legal appointments but the federal magistrate recently loosened some of the restrictions. At the hearing, Rossi asked the judge for permission to attend 13 Red Sox games with friends and family, saying he had purchased the tickets before his arrest; his request was denied.

You know what that means…his friends and family have an extra! Hey, CALL ME! I want to go to the game and am in no way a pederast!

[WLBZ 2]

12
May
09

A Yankee Karate Kid Doppelganger

Ramiro Pena wasn’t considered by anyone a major prospect for the New York Yankees until New York Daily News columnist Bill Madden wrote an article proclaiming Pena as the man to replace Derek Jeter; that made ONE person who considered Pena a prospect. Since getting called up, Pena has done little to prove his past critics wrong, but on the plus side, he’s shown that Bill Madden (a card carrying member of the BBWAA) knows little to nothing about the game of baseball as it is played on the field. Masterfully played by Ralph Macchio, Daniel Larusso from Karate Kid was an out-of-place kid who just wanted to learn karate and have as many awkward, sexually-charged tension-filled moments with an elderly Japanese man as any other normal American teen. Fortunately for Larusso, he had MANY MANY of those scenes with Mr. Miyaga. Together, the two man-boys are nearly identical.

Please vote in the poll below so this doppelganger can move on to the heaven that is PERMANENT doppelganger page.

PenaLarusso

12
May
09

A Double Jeff Doppelganger

A first round draft pick in 2004, Jeff Niemann was supposed to be one of the first wave of Rays young arms. Unfortunately, along the way he got lapped by some of his compatriots; getting his first extended look this season he hasn’t been particularly impressive but the sample size is a bit small. Best remembered for starring in such classics as Dumb and Dumber, and Dumb and Dumberer, Jeff Daniels has been in over 60 movies and played Anna Paquin’s father in Fly Away Home, nine years later he played her love interest in The Squid and the Whale. Now that’s range! Considering the almost 30 years age difference between the two men, let’s call this one, spotted by reader Saint Dynamite, more of a father-son type doppelganger.

What do you think? Make sure to vote in the poll below and if this one receives enough on it will go to the permanent doppelganger page that you would be foolish to miss.

NiemannDaniels

11
May
09

Fan Upset that Big Baby Bumped His Precious

After Glen “Big Baby” Davis hit the game-winning shot last night he was justifiably excited, he ran down the court almost in amazement that he actually hit the shot. Along the way, he bumped into a 12 year old fan who was sitting courtside; in predictable look-at-me over-reactive American society, the adolescent’s father sent a letter today to the NBA demanding an apology.

Ernest Provetti, the father of 12 year old Nicholas said that Davis crossed the line, literally, and knocked his son’s baseball hat off and embarrassed his son.

“The NBA makes it clear to not cross the sideline,” he said in a telephone interview. “If I cross that line, the NBA will take away my tickets. It’s a double standard.”

Well, the way I see it, you’re there to SEE THE PLAYERS, if a PLAYER makes a GAME-WINNING, SERIES SAVING SHOT and stumbles a little as he falls backwards from the shot and in his exuberance happens to touch your little snowflake who happens to be RIGHT next to the floor, then you get the FUCK OVER IT.

Of course, when a player DIVES for a ball into the stands and lands on people, everyone has no problem with this, although, apparently in Provetti’s mind the player should be kicked out of the arena. YOU ARE THERE TO SEE THE PLAYERS, NO ONE IS THERE TO SEE YOU.

According to Provetti, in his letter he said that Davis acted like a “raging animal with no regard for fans’ personal safety.” Well, first off Ernest, you’re a douchebag. Secondly, I’ve watched the video, your son gets BUMPED and then Davis moves on. Big Baby did NOT throw your son into the seats, and if the kid did fall over, he should learn how to stand better. But sure, why not take the opportunity to get your name on the news, who knows, maybe you can get a lawsuit out of this.

“How do you like to be a 12-year-old and see a raging lunatic coming at you?” Provetti said today. Well, if I were 12 years old and my Dad got me courtside seats to a playoff game I’d shut my fucking mouth and be happy for ANYTHING. Glen Davis got his sweat on me? AWESOME, THANKS DAD! I guess Provetti’s little bundle of special is too sensitive for that. I hope Child Services comes by and removes Nicholas from his father and instead he can learn to be a member of society that DOESN’T coddle you and make you a soft pussy whiny asshole. Of course, that’s probably too much to ask. Nicholas, I’m sorry y0u have such an fuck-hole for your dad.

I hate people.

[Orlando Sentinel]

11
May
09

They Always Destroy Those We Love Most

Sad news today; those pictures from the Panamanian cricket game that seemed too good to be true were just that. Careful investigation by The Rap Up has discovered that the initial doubts were justified, these photos were photoshopped. Why must the world conspire to take away the best among us? Here is the ORIGINAL photo prior to being altered; still nice, but not out of this world.

realSigh.

[The Rap Up]




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