Posts Tagged ‘Fenway

14
May
09

Fenway Not Being So Friendly

Brian Rossi (left) used to be a middle school gym teacher in Worcester, MA until he got arrested for possessing child pornography; apparently that makes his job something of a problem. He’s currently under house arrest and wears an electronic tracking monitor at all times. Rossi was only allowed to leave the house for court-approved medical or legal appointments but the federal magistrate recently loosened some of the restrictions. At the hearing, Rossi asked the judge for permission to attend 13 Red Sox games with friends and family, saying he had purchased the tickets before his arrest; his request was denied.

You know what that means…his friends and family have an extra! Hey, CALL ME! I want to go to the game and am in no way a pederast!

[WLBZ 2]

03
Apr
08

Theo Epstein and The Red Sox Present: The Birds!

There you are, just another normal day, getting a tour of Fenway Park with one’s middle school and then BAM! Hawk attack! It could happen to you. Or rather, it did happen, to this girl.

Apparently during the winter months hawks often make their homes up in the rafters of Fenway eating tasty mice and rats until the season starts and the massive crowds force them to find new digs. Then this middle school girl from Bristol, Connecticut had the gall to stand there idly minding her own business about 40 feet away from the hawk’s egg that it was protecting. Taking umbrage it seems, the hawk attacked, talons out. Fortunately the girl was taken to a hospital and wasn’t harmed at all. Still, that makes for quite the return bus ride to Connecticut. When appraised of what had happened, Hank Steinbrenner refused to be outdone and announced that from now on pumas will be given free rein of Yankee Stadium. “We want to be at the forefront of providing our fans with an experience they will never forget. Puma’s are majestic, beautiful creatures and we look forward to a long, fruitful partnership with them.” Steinbrenner announced in a statement beamed directly to my brain, “Our fans are so special to us, and to give them the opportunity to be that close up to such a deadly animal is a memory that they will all treasure as we play this final season at the Stadium.”




Follow The Slanch Report

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 19 other followers

Sign Our Petition!

The Slanch Report has started an online petition asking the MLB Network to air the Dock Ellis no-hitter he threw on June 12, 1970 against the San Diego Padres. The moment was a seminal piece of baseball history and is certainly worthy of being rerun.

Please join us in this cause and sign the petition below so we can all share in this special and fantastic moment of baseball history. THANKS!
SIGN THE PETITION HERE! AND PLEASE TELL YOUR FRIENDS AND PASS THIS ALONG!

September 2019
M T W T F S S
« Jan    
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
30  

Categories