Archive for June 10th, 2009


Papi’s Special Sauce Will Burn Your Mouth Off

papi-art__1244575315_1941With a string of hits recently, hopefully on the field erstwhile Red Sox slugger David Ortiz is getting back to his usual ways; off the field, Ortiz has been blazing hot, or at least his line of hot sauces are.

There are 4 different levels of hotness to the sauces; Original En Fuego, Monster Double En Fuego, Off the Wall Triple En Fuego, and Grand Slam En Fuego, the fieriest, which is so hot that even Ortiz won’t dare try it. “I put hot sauce on pretty much everything,” he says, “But I like mild hot, not burning hot. Not crazy hot. It’s not about being a tough guy, I’m telling you right now, number four is pretty dang hot. I do not think a human being should try something hotter than that.”

When remembering the development process when he accidentally put too much of the Grand Slam En Fuego on his food Ortiz recalled “I got burnt. I wasn’t paying attention. When I sipped it, I saw flames coming out of my head.”

Considering his, er, girth, I think it’s fair to say that Ortiz — a self-professed “grill-master” — is well aware of what makes a good meal. Working with New York-based developers Off Beat LLC to develop the sauces, Ortiz has been tasting and testing different options for over a year and half until he felt that the sauces were finally right. The proceeds from the sales will go to the David Ortiz Children’s Fund, which raises money for kids in need of medical care in New England and in Ortiz’s native Dominican Republic.

Interestingly studies have proven “that the capsaicin found in many hot peppers can cause an endorphin rush similar to runners’ high. “Oh, yeah?” says Papi. ‘Maybe I’ll bring a bottle [to a game] and take a sip before I hit. See how that works.'” Maybe that’s been the spark that’s (semi-)awoken Ortiz’ bat!

[Boston Globe]


More on the MLB Draft

For those of you too cool for school and so are not following along the incredibly fun conference call that is the remainder of the draft, you’re missing out on some great stuff such as:

  • The Red Sox taking Seth Schwindenhammer with the 168th pick, if he makes the majors he would take the title away from Jarrod Saltalamachia for the longest last name in MLB history.
  • Patrick Schuster, he of the 4 straight no-hitters, was taken number 396 by the Diamondbacks.
  • The 14th round features such awesome names as Chadwick Bell (424, Rangers), Casio Grider (427, Dodgers), Sequoyah Stonecipher (428, Marlins) (my favorite) and Graham Stoneburner (435, Yankees)
  • The Oakland Athletics took Josh Leyland out of San Dimas High School, I wonder if the town has a statue for Bill and Ted yet. San Dimas High football RULES!
  • In the 15th round the Red Sox take current bullpen fire-baller Daniel Bard’s younger brother, Luke Bard, a RHP out of high school, gotta love those bloodlines!
  • There are a whole lot of junior colleges around this country, even more amazing, they all seem to have baseball programs. What’s the deal there? Is it just a relatively cheap sport to be able to support or is is because the NCAA doesn’t care about baseball because it doesn’t make it money?
  • Several of the teams have a woman’s voice making their picks, does this mean the old boys club is going away? Do I need to become a woman to get a job in baseball, because I’ll consider it…
  • With pick 544, the Rangers take Michael Schaaf. SHUT YO’ MOUTH. But I was just talking about Schaaf… And we can dig it.

Ervin Santana Has a Potty Mouth

After out-dueling super-ace Justin Verlander 5 days ago, Angels starter Ervin Santana can be forgiven for a brief lapse of judgement when speaking with Angels team reporter Jose Mota after the game. While his language may not have been appropriate for television, Santana, who is back with a vengeance after an elbow injury earlier in the year, is more than welcome to say whatever he wants on Angels TV if he continues pitching as he has.

And really, isn’t that the attitude you WANT from an ace pitcher?


Gortat’s Tat Causes Execs to Say “F That”

090609-marcin-gortat-200bknPolish-born reserve center Marin Gortat is expected to get even more playing time as the NBA Finals continue, being tasked with the difficult task of trying to stop Lamar Odom, but with the added playing time comes a larger lens focusing on him, something his sponsors at Reebok are a bit concerned about. Gortat, you see, has a tattoo on his calf, and the cameras seem to find it fairly regularly; unfortunately for Reebok, it’s a tattoo of Michael Jordan’s Nike logo. Last weekend Gortat received a phone call from someone at Reebok asking him to either wear his socks up higher or put makeup on the tattoo so that it wouldn’t be seen on television. 

“They called and said I had to do something about it, but that ain’t going to happen. I’ve been wearing it 4-5 years now, and it helped me get to the NBA,” said Gortat. “They didn’t say anything about it when I signed the contract, so it’s not going anywhere. I don’t think they are paying me enough to take it off.”

090609-gortat-tattoo-200bknConsidering that he’s a semi-scrubby backup center, it’s doubtful that his deal with Reebok provides much in the way of spending money, so there probably isn’t much financial incentive there for him.

“I’ve heard from other people that even other players, if they don’t know my name, they know I’m the big white guy with the Jordan tattoo,” Gortat said. “I like that. Reebok will have to get used to that.”

Now, me, I’d like to be known for my play on the court, but sure, being known for a tattoo works too…

Meanwhile, Nike must be loving this, they get free publicity and they don’t even need to toss any free sneakers at Gortat. Win-Win.



The Orioles Fail at Spelling


There must be something in the water in the Washington DC/Baltimore area; first there was the disaster when the Nationals went out to play in uniforms with their name misspelled, and now the Orioles suffer from a similar error. The team’s Twitter feed may not be of the utmost importance to the front-office, but it’s pretty embarrassing to have your team name in large font prominently displayed on the screen as “Oriloes.”

Since this first got reported, the Orioles have subsequently fixed their error but that it happened in the first place is simply awful. Hey, guess what, I’m a GREAT speller, hint hint MLB teams…

[Home Run Derby]

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June 2009