This gallery has some amazing still photos of some big ass hits from the NFL. These are not all from this year with many from seasons past, but frankly, who really cares when you get to see some big men knocking the shit out of one another. Look at Ocho Cinco’s face when he gets popped here, don’t you wish that could happen EVERY time he catches a ball? Check out the full gallery here!
Now here’s a headline that I think we can all get behind. I think all of us have used that argument before. Remember ladies, it’s not the size of the wave but the motion of the ocean. Yeah, that’s the ticket!
[Fan IQ]
Ray Moon is the world’s oldest bodybuilder at 80 years old. The octogenarian has gone through polio, cardiac arrest, open heart surgery, twisted bowels, multiple strokes, has a pacemaker and goddamn is he sexy. Feast your eyes on this piece of meat ladies! I don’t know about everyone else, but I’m reexamining my sexuality right now.
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This video has simply too many amazing things going on within it, it’s hard to believe that it is from an actual newscast. First off, the topic is that these women are starting a petition to have pole dancing added to the gymnastic events in the Olympics. OK, that seems strange, but I’m willing to agree that skilled pole dancing does have many impressive gymnastic elements so that’s not ridiculous. Then there is the fact that this newscast is from Utah, the official state of boring people. When was the last time pole dancing and Utah were in the same sentence, let alone in a POSITIVE news story?
Follow that with one of the co-owners of the studio in her giant stripper heels saying that the shoes are only for building strength, “[they] really help my calves get stronger…” she says, ALMOST with a straight face. Meanwhile the video features a lady in fishnets upside down slithering on the pole. Yeah, NOTHING to do with strippers. Throw in the Mormon housewives in the class and this video simply has everything you could ever ask for. And then, just to top off the unintentional comedy in this video, the petition has 300 signatures! 300! And they are trying to become an Olympic sport! I’m not a member of the Olympic Committee, however, I feel safe in saying that you’ll need significantly more than 300 people in UTAH to become an official Olympic sport.
[FAN IQ]
From the Denver Nuggets game the other day, comes this video (via FAN IQ) of one of the Nuggets dancers (Bridget) while the telecast comes out of commercial. There’s something hypnotic about it, particularly in slow motion, that clearly also distracted the announcers. Listen as they start talking and then for some reason get completely off-track and go silent for a few moments. I wonder why. Maybe their nachos just got delivered at that moment. Yeah, that’s gotta be it. Looks like it was quite an exciting basketball game!
Kids grow up too fast these days, take this video of a little girl who is already about 100 times better than me at basketball. It is simply unfair that this girl would probably WRECK me out on the court. Sigh.
In eighth grade I decided to join the wrestling team for my winter activity. After one practice which involved way too much running, and then close contact with other sweaty, smelly teenage boys I quit and joined the basketball team instead. I played 4 minutes every game, averaged 2 three pointers per game and that was plenty. Now, after this story, I’m REALLY glad I quit. Three York College students are suing the school because after wrestling with a teammate during practice they all contracted herpes. First of all, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
The complaint states that one of the team’s wrestlers had Herpes Simplex Virus 1 lesions on his skin which held him out of practice for three days, then, the team’s trainer bandaged up the lesions and sent herpes boy out to wrestle. For the next few weeks various members of the wrestling team then started noticing herpes outbreaks of their own, FUN!
The NCAA actually has herpes wrestling rules which state that wrestlers with herpes must be on antiviral medication for 5 days before they are allowed to practice or compete and that no outbreaks can be covered with bandages to allow a person to compete. So, by those regulations, and based on what the students said happen, it looks like the school is at fault. Of course, that’s just one side of the story, so who knows for certain.
The students are seeking more than $50,000 in damages, which to me is DEFINITELY not enough to cover up the fact that these guys now have the herp. I mean, it’s bad enough that you wrestle, it’s worse that you wrestled some dude with herpes, it’s awful that now they have facial herpes and such. I’m officially terrified.
I don’t know why, but the idea of a coach-in-waiting to me is somewhat creepy. Jim Mora in Seattle, Jim Caldwell in Indianapolis and Jason Garrett in Dallas are all head coaches in waiting in the NFL, and to me, it seems like the nature of the job would lead to problems. Say for example, hypothetically a team like the Cowboys is struggling and their head coach looks over matched, at what point does the head coach lose all credibility and instead players and media start paying attention only to what the coach-in-waiting is saying or doing. After all, he’s going to be the big guy soon enough. I’m not the only one thinking this way either.
Anyways, the University of Texas yesterday announced that defensive coordinator Will Muschamp is the successor to head coach Mack Brown, who has made no announcement that he is expected to retire anytime soon. All my worries about the distraction such a coach-in-waiting could cause though were proved completely fair when I saw this photo of Muschamp on the sidelines. How can Mack Brown compete against a defensive coordinator that can LEVITATE!?! That’s some David Blaine shit right there and we all know he’s a scumbag, so now Mack has to deal with a coach-in-waiting, who everyday is probably waiting for something awful to befall him, AND someone who has studied with David Blaine. This cannot turn out well.
Watch your back Mack.
When the Red Sox traded for Coco Crisp I was excited, I thought we might be getting a young Johnny Damon, the comparisons were there, clearly that didn’t happen. However, his time with the Red Sox featured some of the greatest plays in the outfield that I’ve seen, as well as this summer when for a time Coco was playing like the best CF in the game. I remember rearranging the roster on MVP ’05 on my Gamecube to throw Coco into the mix and see how he fit in on the Sox. In the first game he got hurt and was lost for the season. I should have seen that as a sign. Instead I restarted. He went on to have a decent video game season, but never met my expectations.
Was a strong middle reliever all that the Sox could get for him? I thought the market for Coco was a bit better, I thought the haul would be a little better, but hey, a strong bullpen arm is always necessary. Initial thoughts make this move seem like a first step to transferring Masterson back to the rotation, I for one hope that is NOT the case. I want to see (like Keith Law) Masterson become a super reliever. Someone who pitches something like 100-120 innings a year, comes in for 2-3 inning stretches at a time. I think he’d be PERFECT in this role and would be inherently MORE valuable than he would be in the rotation because I think his stuff plays better in a limited role, also, it lets him avoid more left handed hitters. Sure, the option now exists for Masterson to switch back, but I think his best role will be in the bullpen for the long term.
As for Ramirez, via the Sons of Sam Horn comes this interesting stat, on pitches out of the strike zone that players swung at, the top three were Mariano Rivera at 36.3%, Jonathan Papelbon was at 34.3% and Ramirez was third with 33.3%. That’s AWESOME. Sure, it’s a very limited, specific stat, but it’s interesting nonetheless.
It’s not sad to see Coco go because we all knew this was coming, I appreciate all he did for the team, most of all for never bitching during the season even though everyone knew he wanted to be the starter. He was a man about it all and I appreciate that. Plus, he had the best punch avoiding incident in recent baseball memory, (even if it was stupid to have charged the mound in the first place.)
So long Covelli.
Hello Ramon!
Straight outta Japan comes this video of a guy in some batting cages taking a few swings. Only instead of using a standard you know, baseball bat, he opts for using his nunchuks. Makes sense to me. I gotta say it’s pretty damn impressive to be spraying line drives all over with such a small stick.
I know it’s confusing, you see someone the same size as yourself and you perk up, but you need to remember that you’re the size of tiny people and so age is VERY important…
While trying to run his charity event, “Do the Wright Thing” at the Hard Rock Cafe in Times Square, David Wright was mobbed by a cougar. Actually, many of them, most of them from Jersey and according to the NY Post, these “trashy-looking” women also had “bad 80s hair.”
David was forced to try and maintain order, telling the women, “Ladies, calm down! Please, relax.” It didn’t stop Wright from being attacked or the kids in front of the women being pushed down.
Goddamn he’s marketable.
The Slanch Report has started an online petition asking the MLB Network to air the Dock Ellis no-hitter he threw on June 12, 1970 against the San Diego Padres. The moment was a seminal piece of baseball history and is certainly worthy of being rerun.
Please join us in this cause and sign the petition below so we can all share in this special and fantastic moment of baseball history. THANKS!
SIGN THE PETITION HERE! AND PLEASE TELL YOUR FRIENDS AND PASS THIS ALONG!
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