Everything about this video seems wrong; people lifting weights via only hooks in their body? Check. Crazy scary flexibility? Check. And then there’s more.
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That’s Manny Pacquiao landing the knockout punch against Ricky Hatton this weekend. I think it hurt a lot. Also, dude in the background, get off the phone!
[Yahoo]
Now, far be it from me to say that the semi-mass hysteria regarding swine flu is ridiculous, just because it is a media created pandemic as compared to, you know, an ACTUAL pandemic doesn’t mean there aren’t plenty of fools to take it seriously. Right now I’m on a bus to Boston, and these are the two winners sitting across the aisle from me. Unless they are aliens with second breathing apparatuses on the tops of their foreheads I don’t quite understand the surgical masks. What purpose do they serve not being worn? Is it a fashion statement? Because if so it’s a stupid one. They came onto the bus, not wearing them, then put them on for about a minute, then TOOK THEM OFF to eat their Chipotle burritos and the masks have since remained entrenched on their foreheads. I’m sure they’re both nice guys, but c’mon, don’t get sucked in by a bored media desperate for any story to hammer into the ground. And really, if this were a real pandemic that you might get sick from those masks aren’t going to be enough. You’d be better off ducking and covering.
Call me crazy but I’d prefer to think of these two as the crazies and ME as the sane voice of reason out here in the wilderness.
I guess fighting Danny Bonaduce wasn’t enough of a challenge — even though Bonaduce fought Canseco to a draw when they faced off in January — because Jose Canseco has signed up to fight 7-foot-2 Korean kickboxer Hong Man Choi at the Dream 9 mixed martial arts tournament in Tokyo on May 26th.
Jose is gonna get WRECKED. I know he needs money but there has to be a better way. Hong Man Choi is a GIGANTIC MONSTER of a human being and I’m terrified of him in picture form. Even though Choi doesn’t have a sterling record in the ring, neither does Canseco and Choi is definitely going to destroy him.
Does Vegas take bets on whether or not a fighter will die in the ring? Does it make me a bad person for even asking?
The fight will be on PPV, I need to scrape up the cash for it immediately.
[Fan IQ]
Samantha Albanese is a high school softball player for Castilleja High School, an all-girls school in Palo Alto, California, she also has some crazy good pitching skills.
During Monday’s game, her team eventually won 3-2 over Sequoia-Redwood City in 14 innings, along the way, Albanese struck out 37(!!!!!) opposing batters and threw a complete game. Pretty damn impressive. As if striking out that many batters isn’t awesome enough, there was an extra burden on Albanese; the international tiebreaker rule — which starts each inning with a base runner on second beginning in the 10th — was incorporated starting in the 8th inning.
“I had no idea she had that many strikeouts,” said Sequoia coach Scott Reynick when informed of the news. “I thought we battled well and made her work. We had some opportunities to get some runs across. She’s just a great pitcher.”
To prove she isn’t JUST a dominant pitcher, Albanese added in three of Castilleja’s five total hits in the game, including an RBI but she humbly takes it all in stride.
“It was as much stress mentally as it was physically,” Albanese said. “It’s hard to stay mentally strong. I’ve never pitched 14 innings before. Sequoia is a solid team. They are real good on defense.”
The Castilleja Gators are now 11-0 on the season and Albanese has 193 strikeouts in those 11 games, fanning an average of 17.6 batters per game.
Wow. That is AWESOMELY dominant. Take that Stephen Strasburtg
Joey Strong is a 35 year old mother who volunteers every year at the Holy Name School in Ausable, NY, helping out with the elementary school’s girls basketball team. Her desire to help the community doesn’t stop there though, Strong was recently arrested and is facing charges for allegedly endangering the welfare of a child, first-degree unlawful dealing with a child and of course, felony third-degree rape, all this because she bought some alcohol for four 16 year old boys and then had sex with one of them. Yeah, that kid is MISERABLE right now, won’t ANYONE think of the children?!?
The news of Strong’s arrest was very surprising to her neighbors who featured such money quotes as, “It surprised me,” said Edith Beardsley. That’s some bang-up local reporting WPTZ. (Video of the report here.)
Jean Pulsifer, the principal at Holy Name had this to say in a prepared statement, “The incident for which Mrs. Strong has been accused has nothing to do with her association with Holy Name school. during her time as a volunteer coach no policies were broken or infringed upon.”
The incident in question allegedly occurred on March 30 when Strong met the 4 boys at a Comfort Inn bringing along the Coors Lite, then she got on the love train with one of the teens. Oh what a night.
[WPZT]
An Australian rules football team, the Torquay Tigers, faces’ were a bit red today after their most recent game promotion has caused some uproar. For some unknown reason, fans were upset and angered by the team’s plans for an “All White Night” particularly since the team’s website announcement featured a bridal party, a white tiger and, of course, some Ku Klux Klan members.
It caught me by surprise, because I haven’t been on the website for a while. I didn’t know anything about it,” said Michael Coleman, Torquay Tigers club secretary. “But I’m thinking ‘All White Night’ and hoping no one would find any racism in that. But the picture is likely to be the work of an individual person and it’s certainly not the club’s thoughts.”
The image was removed and replaced with a small photo of Snow White — because that fixes it. Then later, in large part due to the negative backlash, the team removed the event completely and the May 2nd match is just listed as a normal game, sans any promotion.
28
Apr
09
In the Wild Stokke’s Run Rampant
I don’t have much to say here, I know at least one reader who will be beside himself at this post…
Via Coed Magazine comes all new photos fresh off Allison Stokke’s facebook page, because you know, that’s the world we live in. In addition, here are some photos from a meet she had recently so you can see the pole vaulting champion in action. OMG, she’s just like us! She takes pictures with awkward white dudes too! She eats! I eat! We’re meant for each other!
I like the glasses…
27
Apr
09
Your Kentucky Derby LOCK
If you’re looking for a good pick for next week’s Kentucky Derby, we’ve got a great inside tip for you; go with Musket Man.
Now, I’m already biased towards this horse because I have an affinity for Revolutionary War soldier art (don’t ask) but if your own innate patriotism isn’t enough for you there are other, very worthy reasons to pick him.
First, Musket Man has won 5 of the 6 races he’s participated in, including victories in the Illinois and Tampa Bay Derbys this year. Also, Derek Ryan, Musket Man’s trainer has loads of confidence in his steed, “Best temperament of any horse I’ve ever had. Nothing bothers him. He goes with the flow.”
Secondly, as part of his daily training routine, much like you might have a beer after work to relax, Musket Man has a Guinness. Why you ask? Because, according to Ryan, it “…mellows him out I hope. Nah, it gives him a good appetite. They say a Guinness a day is good for you. So far it’s worked.”
I can’t think of a safer bet than a drunken horse.
[WHAS]
As part of an advertising campaign to raise awareness about bowel cancer — the second leading cause of cancer-related deaths in the UK, killing 44 Britons a day — several members of the English national soccer team participated in a high-tech photo shoot.
The campaign, “There is Moore to Know” is sponsored in part by the Bobby Moore Fund for Cancer Research UK, after the former English team captain who died of bowel cancer at age 51. The unique images were created using cutting edge technologies to draw attention to the inner workings of the body, in particular the bowels. Because you can never pay TOO much time to the bowels. Taking the images that sports photographer John Davis shot, a 3d visualizations company added in the anatomical layers.
Stephanie Moore, Bobby’s widow and founder of the Bobby Moore Fund: “The support of the current England squad means so much to me and to the Bobby Moore Fund as a whole. Through this campaign, the players will help raise awareness of bowel cancer.”
David James (above) commented: “Lives can be saved if more people know about bowel cancer and can recognise the symptoms of the disease.”
22
Apr
09
Power Slide the Planet
I had no idea that this was being considered an actual sport, but last Wednesday, in Santa Monica there was a Power Sliding competition. For those of you who are unfamiliar, power sliding is like skateboarding, only instead of grinding on a rail with a board, you slide down it using just your pants.
Now, maybe I’m just out of touch, but this seems retarded to me.
The competition featured a 40-foot high course with rails, boxes and other items for people to grind on.
Don’t get me wrong, I love the idea of teenagers sliding face first down a rail, I just want more of them to break their faces open doing it…
Although, I am in favor of seeing Kendra Wilkinson (who was one of the judges for the competition) from the absymal Girls Next Door taking a rail like this…
[Examiner and The Frisky]
The Slanch Report 
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