The hazing of baseball rookies continues! At Trevor Hoffman’s request the Padres rookies were dressed in Hooters outfits as part of their annual hazing ritual. It makes sense to me that Hoffman is a big Hooters fan, after all, the wings ARE delicious!
UPDATED TO ADD
The gents over at With Leather found this other fine photo of the Padres posing for photos in their Hooters garb. It’s almost enough to ruin Hooters for America.
Last night at the Slopicana, the Old Scratch Rays took the season series against the Sox pushing their lead to 2 games with 10 to play and likely ensuring not only their first ever playoff appearance, but to win the division. Despite their success this year, the fans still haven’t been showing up enough, making it possible for Red Sox fans to buy tickets without a problem and make their voices heard, sometimes we wish they wouldn’t… Take for example Christopher Sciesinski, a Sox fan who attended the game and decided that it was appropriate to try and vault the dugout and run onto the field. The security folk jumped into action and nabbed him before he made it onto the field and took him into custody. While getting cuffed one of the cops pulled out his taser and held it against Sciesinksi’s neck, but never discharged it.
Things to love about this picture:
Clearly feeling lonely and outshined, later in the game Sciesinski’s friend Robert Mansour decided that he too wanted to taste the metal bracelets and got arrested after drunkenly starting a fight with another fan. That way they had a buddy in jail. Now that’s friendship!
Nomar Garciaparra is well known for his many quirks and OCD antics at the plate, and this video of the Batting Stance Guy takes aim at Nomar with Nomar watching from the dugout. Fortunately Nomar has a good sense of humor about it.
Unfortunately Nomar tore his ACL while laughing and will be out for the forseeable future.
Whilst I was listening to the Big Show on WEEI yesterday, Curt Schilling called in to talk with Lou Merloni and Brian Daubach about Manny Ramirez as a teammate. It was a totally random call, Schilling, the ol’ blowhard was just driving around and decided to call in. His call is an interesting look at Manny from a teammate’s perspective.
Don’t get me wrong, Manny is gone, and I’ve moved on. Sure, he’s putting up the ridiculous numbers I expected from him this season, but he never would have done them with the Sox, as Schilling explained, everyone in the clubhouse wasn’t sure if Manny would even play for the rest of the season. To me, when I hear that the situation with Manny became, according to Lou Merloni, “as bad as Carl Everett” I’m thankful that we managed to get someone as solid as Jason Bay before it was too late. Also, it is fun to speculate on who said that to Lou as, according to this site, the only two remaining teammates of Carl Everett on the Sox are Tim Wakefield and Jason Varitek, so I wonder which one believes Manny and Jurassic Carl became one and the same. I’m guessing ‘Tek.
Finally, I apppreciate Schilling admitting that he’s been a drain on the payroll because he hasn’t thrown a pitch all season. Schilling is a whole lot of things but honest is one of them. Definitely listen to the clip though because it is an interesting take on the whole situation.
I enjoy that whenever a high school team hazes someone it becomes major news and everyone wrings their hands and decries how horrible it is. However, when it comes to a professional sports team, the media can’t wait to fall all over themselves covering hazing and presenting it as hilarious and all in good fun. Sure, for some reason high school hazing always seems to end with someone getting teabagged or a plunger shoved somewhere uncomfortable and the pros merely make their rookies dress up in drag but still, isn’t hazing supposed to be illegal? That isn’t to say I don’t enjoy it, I mean who doesn’t want to see baseball players dressed as characters from High School Musical? Also, it is certainly a far distance between sodomizing someone with a plunger to making someone wear a dress, but I was under the impression that hazing is hazing.
Regardless, it seems obvious the Red Sox are breast-men based on some of the outfits that the rookies were forced to wear. Also, I’m curious who proposed High School Musical, I hope it was someone who has a young daughter or something, and not some veteran on the Sox who creepily watches that show. Anyhoo, here are some of the photos from the Sox rookies getting dressed for their journey down to Tampa. For more media fawning over this annual hazing ritual, check out the gallery from WBZ here and for pictures from the fan’s perspective, check out Center Field’s gallery.
Catcher George Kotteras has boobs for days
Chris Smith and Jeff Bailey make all the boys' hearts swoon
Jonathan Van Every knows what he likes, and that would be big boobs
Jed Lowrie though looks like a bad extra from Dazed and Confused
If I was one of the rookies I'd be furious that Justin Masterson and David Pauley got off so easy
First Jonathan Papelbon taught me how to play craps now, he’s taught me how to love. Papelbon’s mom, who clearly has an awesome sense of humor sent these embarassing videos to the Red Sox and Comcast Sportsnet from Papelbon’s high school years. In them Papelbon and a friend are dressed in drag and dancing and then later, Papelbon and friend recreate the final scene from Dirty Dancing which Paps as the Swayze. The reaction around the Red Sox clubhouse as they watch the video is pretty hilarious, especially when Papelbon and the guy get close enough for a near kiss. The best part for me though is David Ortiz both introducing the video and then interviewing Papelbon afterwards, the Large Father is a pretty funny dude.
There are several more videos, including the full unadulterated version on Comcast’s website here if you are so interested.
The Yankees are seemingly intent on making Joba Chamberlain an ineffective pitcher for the near future. That’s because after his latest return from the DL, Joba is headed to the bullpen for the remainder of the season. And, unless something drastic happens, he is unlikely to pitch much more than 100 innings this year, which would mean the process of making him a starter would be exactly where it was this year. Meaning that Chamberlain will be forced to start NEXT season in the bullpen as well. Now, instead of merely wasting ONE year at the major league level, the Yankees are on their way to wasting a second of Joba’s prime years because he won’t be able to throw 200+ innings for at least another year. Chamberlain, who should be a dominant starter, is now being relegated to single inning stints for the next 9 months because the innings increase would be too much possible strain on his arm. Job well done fellas. Now, I appreciate the caution that they are exercising, in fact I think it’s wise, the only problem is that they should have stretched Joba out THIS year, in the minors to start the season. Instead they get 3 straight seasons where he doesn’t pitch enough innings to be truly useful.
Oh, but don’t worry, because the organization is totally aware what’s going on, particularly Joe Girardi who doesn’t let anything slip past him. When asked if the Yankees had mishandled the situation, Girardi responded that this season “had not stunted Chamberlain’s progress.” Brian Cashman, Girardi’s boss (at least for the rest of this season) however feels differently, saying that this season had done just that.
I am in full support of abusing Joba as much as possible, because he otherwise terrifies me. So, keep up the good work boys. Let’s keep him in useless one inning spurts instead of harnessing his incredible stuff to be a dominant starter. Red Sox Nation thanks you all.
I may be a cynic, but this story is one that really impressed me. Koyie Hill isn’t likely to ever become much more than backup catcher at the major league level, his stats there are less than inspiring, but his recall on Monday to the Cubs is one of the more unlikely stories of the season. That’s because last October, while building a window frame for his home, the wood got stuck in his table saw and when attempting to free it, Hill sliced his thumb, pinkie, ring and middle fingers clear through. Rushing to a hospital, a hand specialist was called in and Hill’s digits were able to be reattached. Knowing he was a ballplayer, when the doctors were fixing his hand, adding some bones into his middle finger to replace ones that were lost, the doctors fixed the hand to fit a baseball perfectly, as Hill says:
Catching is easy. Thank God it wasn’t my left hand. They added enough bones to my middle finger to where it moves some. They had me hold a ball in my left hand to see where my finger was placed so when they sewed it back on it was fixed in a position. So you could say it was actually built for playing baseball now, which is something a baseball player always wanted.
Hill asked the Cubs to keep his injury from the public and after several months of rehab and working with coaches, he was able to get back to his business of playing ball. Even though doctors told him his career was likely over, Hill refused to accept that, finishing the AAA season with a .275 average at Iowa along with 17 home runs, 24 doubles and 64 RBIs in 113 games.
“Now [the hand] is as good, or a little better,” he said. “I’ve been lucky enough to even be able to play. To be back here is a dream come true within itself. I never had a doubt I would play again. I just didn’t know what level and what limitations my hand [was] going to allow me to play.
“The first couple of months, when it was 30 degrees, I felt like I had frozen carrots for fingers. It didn’t feel good to hold a bat, let alone swing it. To make contact was even worse.”
Today, Hill is once more back in the majors, and on a World Series contender no less. While he doesn’t figure to be a major part of the playoffs team, if he even makes the roster, just being back up has to be more than enough for Hill who hasn’t lost his sense of humor throughout this whole ordeal. The hardest part of all this for him? “You had to learn how to give high-fives all over again.”
From Fernando Perez, a Tampa Bay Rays farmhand ranked as their 17th best prospect, a former Ivy Leaguer who graduated from Columbia with a creative writing degree and who has been nicknamed “Mr. Excitement” comes this awesome fake-out during a Durham Bulls game. This is by far one of the best bits of fakery I’ve ever seen on a baseball diamond and I’d say his nickname appears to be well-earned.
From the Boston Globe’s Red Sox blog today:
“The answer is: Carlos Baerga, 2002.
The question: Who was the last Sox second baseman to bat cleanup?
Dustin Pedroia gets the honor tonight. The reason? Terry Francona indicated with Kevin Youkilis suffering from the flu to go along with Coco Crisp and Josh Beckett on the team sick bed, that he wanted to create a lineup that would be tough for the White Sox bullpen to counter. Francona said he’s taking a lot of grief from both Pedroia and David Ortiz over the lineup, Pedroia who keeps saying, “It’s about time” and Ortiz, who jokingly said he will retire.
Francona said he won’t make a habit of batting his little second baseman cleanup, but White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen did indicate after an 8-0 loss to the Sox that Pedroia was currently a tougher hitter to get out than Ortiz.”
Pedroia, who is the exact same size and weight as me, gives me hope that MY major league playing career is not a lost cause.
Red Sox Monster came up with this video from last night before the final regular season game ever between the Sox and the Yankees at the Stadium. Some dude was apparently hawking baby pitbulls outside the stadium, because, to me, that’s EXACTLY what I’m looking for before going to a baseball game. I grab a sausage on the street, buy a program, pick up a puppy, and then go watch baseball. Of course! I know also that I definitely want to buy a crazy fighting dog like a pitbull from a rando who thinks the streets of the Bronx are the right place to peddle dogs.
Oh wait, I know what happened, the dog seller guy got confused and because his dogs were attractive thought that everyone outside the stadium would want his “hot dogs.” Get it?!?!?!? Seriously, I’m a comic GENIUS!
Fox’ piece of television trash, Moment of Truth, has signed on the biggest money grubber of them all, Jose Canseco. The show, on which participants are asked the most personal and embarrassing of questions and, if they are willing to tell the true answers to a national audience it is worth cash, is likely to lose a lot of money on Canseco since the man has zero shame and doesn’t care who he takes down with him.
According to KLAC AM 570 in LA:
Canseco already has taped the episode and according to my source that was in attendance during the taping, Canseco was asked if he ever injected Mark McGwire with steroids and if he ever corked his bat among other questions that were asked during the taping. The episode of “The Moment of Truth” with Canseco is supposed to air in late September or early October.
I wonder how much Fox is going to be pushing that during the MLB playoffs. The biggest issue I have, besides that such an awful piece of television exists in the first place, is that the questions and his responses are taped before the show ever airs, all that matters is that he answers the same as he did before. I have no doubt that Jose believes most of the drivel that he speaks, whether it is true or not, and lie detectors are merely tracking whether or not you are lying, if Canseco believes it to be true than it won’t show up as a lie. I hope this doesn’t hurt Jose’s chances at an MLB comeback, because I feel like he was really really close…
The Slanch Report has started an online petition asking the MLB Network to air the Dock Ellis no-hitter he threw on June 12, 1970 against the San Diego Padres. The moment was a seminal piece of baseball history and is certainly worthy of being rerun.
Please join us in this cause and sign the petition below so we can all share in this special and fantastic moment of baseball history. THANKS!
SIGN THE PETITION HERE! AND PLEASE TELL YOUR FRIENDS AND PASS THIS ALONG!
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