Archive for the 'Football' Category



26
Dec
08

That Doesn’t Mean What You Think it Does…

The Hawaii Bowl featured a match up between Hawaii and perennial bowl game loser Notre Dame and, amazingly somehow, Notre Dame pulled out a victory. It just might have saved Charlie Weis’ job. At least for a couple more days…

Anyways, during the game, Dave Pasch, one of the announcers made a slightly bizarre statement that I don’t think was what he intended to say.

Yeah, that means something very different than what you meant Mr. Pasch.

Unless you could see something that we can’t from the TV broadcast…

26
Dec
08

Today in 90s Family Television

This weekend’s San Diego Chargers and Denver Broncos game is a battle for supremacy of the AFC West and the bad blood between these teams is spilling over into a war of words. A strange war of words. For instance, take this bit of trash talk from Chargers defensive end Jacques Cesaire:

They have bad teeth. They have bad hair. They don’t know how to cook. What else don’t I like about them? They watch Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman. Who does that? Who watches Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman? That’s what I want to know. I heard the Denver Broncos watch it. I’m just sayin’.

I’m not quite sure how that is supposed to scare or intimidate the Broncos, but then again, Cesaire is a 2nd string D-Lineman who isn’t particularly good in the first place. Don’t worry though, he wasn’t done.

For the most part, I have no problem with those guys. Some guys might. I mean, obviously the quarterback (Jay Cutler), from what he’s saying about my quarterback (Philip Rivers), I have a little problem with him. But my biggest complaint with him is that he looks like Ringo Starr, you know? I’m just not feeling his haircut.

Take a look at Cutler sometimes. He has like this shag look going. I don’t even know what it’s called. I was just looking at his press conference the other day after the game. He had on this overgrown suit jacket. It was like ‘Come on, man. Let’s get it together.’

When asked what he might say to Cutler if he were to sack him, Cesaire responded with a one word answer, “supercuts.”

Teammates on the Chargers, like Luis Castillo were not in a rush to get behind Cesaire’s comments, worried that he might have given the Broncos some bulletin board material. However, I feel fairly confident that the Broncos are not going to be extra energized just because some scrub accused them of watching “Dr Quinn,” after all, Jane Seymour is a good looking lady, even still, and besides, that show was pretty good. I’m not ashamed to say that when I recently saw the complete series box set available at Costco I seriously considered getting it. I didn’t but I thought about it.

OK. I’m kinda ashamed about that.
[Sign On San Diego]

23
Dec
08

Belichick Gets Mic’d for Practice

This video from NFL.com isn’t super informative, but it was interesting to see parts of Bill Belichick at practice with the Patriots. I especially like when he’s talking to Jerod Mayo and asks him why he needs another car and Randy Moss yells out, “that’s first round money!” I also really appreciate Belichick asking Mayo if he wants to get a Volvo and Mayo saying, “nope!” Anyhoo, enjoy!

ed. to add:

Ok, the video for some reason isn’t embedding, but go to the link above, or click HERE and you can see the video on the NFL website.

23
Dec
08

Young Man, There’s No Need to Feel Down

dsc_0234First of all the Sun Bowl is no longer just the Sun Bowl, now, it’s the Brut Sun Bowl, which I suppose makes all the difference. In order to add to the manly image of the game, at this year’s Sun Bowl which features the Beavers of Oregon State up against the Pittsburgh Panthers, the bowl organizers are going for a Guinness World Record, the most people singing “YMCA” at one time.

“‘YMCA’ is such a fan-friendly song, that we decided if we can get the entire crowd at Sun Bowl Stadium involved, it would be a way to get El Pasoans involved in a Guinness World Record,” said Bernie Olivas, executive director of the Sun Bowl Association. “We realize that it is just a small footnote in life, but what a neat way to remember our 75th anniversary.”

In order to make the experience all that much more memorable and to lead the crowd in the singing are none other than the Village People themselves. Amazingly, they were available.

The Village People, who are celebrating their own anniversary, 30 years, will perform alongside 325 dancers and be followed by performances by the schools’ marching bands.

The previous record for the largest crowd singing “YMCA” was on July 4, 2001 when 13,588 fans rocked out to the song for 5 minutes at a baseball game between the Omaha Spikes and the Salt Lake Stingers at Johnny Rosenblatt Stadium in Omaha, Nebraska.

Way to stick it to Nebraska, Brut!

[Sun Bowl]

23
Dec
08

Shakespeare Presents: Plaxico

You can call me a dork, but this piece from McSweeney’s makes me very happy. Titled “Recovered Scenes from the Tragedy Plaxico by William Shakespeare” it is both hilarious and smart, just like me! If you don’t read this, then you’re just an asshole.

I particularly like the Eli Manning soliloquy:

Act III, scene iv.

The Meadowlands, locker room.

Enter ELI MANNING.

Eli
O Miasma, rank with sweat unlaunder’d!
Effluvium most foul, I have thee ponder’d.
All my vict’ries—aye, today’s included—
Are, with odors stale, at last concluded.
Always thus: to men of great conceiving
Parasitic stench is ever cleaving.
Could Alexander, in his conquest wide,
Lack e’er the scent of flesh’s crimson tide?
Or awesome Khan, unmatch’d in worldly earning,
Escape the fetid balm of Asia burning?
And so, unslak’d, each triumph of ambition
Is companied by fragrance of perdition.
Verily, this soul is parch’d with wanting—
Plaxico, thy glory is my haunting!
I have a brother’s shadow overstepp’d,
And from repute to fool so stead’ly crept.
The barber has with insult grown absurd,
And obsolete the writer’s scornful word.
But, though I’m toasted past what thirst could bear,
The spirits are a swill I cannot share.
Alas, that nature is so firm affix’d,
And not with wisdom’s fairer visage mix’d!
But by the very devil am I urg’d
To fast assure that Plaxico is purg’d;
And, being to my cause so tightly bound,
I hereby cease to plead the wav’ring sound.
Forsooth, this loaded gun shall serve as arm
By which his head is lock’d in crux of harm.
I wrap it now in semblance of a gift
And set it in our locker room adrift,
Where’pon it be discover’d and display’d
And as a nameless gift to him convey’d.
And bless us, Fortune: dimly Plaxico
Shall bear the arm unwittingly, and so,
In time unholy, wholly walk red-handed,
Likewise caught, and as a sinner branded.
Tolerance would not be further carried—
A vain receiver’s legend thus is buried!

And, should this hatchèd plot take wing and fly,
I am the apple o’ the Apple’s eye.


23
Dec
08

Let the Bodies Hit the Floor

Generally the only time you ever hear anything about an offensive lineman is when they get a penalty or give up a sack, but today we are here to praise one. Damion McIntosh is the left tackle on the Kansas City Chiefs and while their season has been consistently inconsistent, he gave the Chiefs fans one reason to cheer during their game against the Dolphins. Watch him as he goes into the secondary and just DEMOLISHES the DBs with two devastating blocks. It’s gotta be pretty awesome to be that big and be able to throw people around like that. I mean, I could do that, I just you know, um, don’t…

22
Dec
08

Seau Takes a Sack

seaufanDuring the fourth quarter of yesterday’s dismantling of the Arizona Cardinals, Junior Seau received a very unexpected hit. A male fan, presumably inebriated, jumped out of the stands and tackled Seau, bringing him to the ground. This took Seau completely unawares. “It was definitely a shock,” he said. “It was probably one of my most memorable moments in my 19-year career. I thought [at first] it was one of my [teammates] that was enjoying the win. As I was laying on the ground I saw this guy in street clothes. Obviously, it was not one of the players or any of the employees of the Patriots. Therefore, security came over and took care of him. I wish him a Merry Christmas.”

Not enough people jump on the field for football games, I think it has something to do with incredibly large men in full pads who won’t think twice about pummeling you. Baseball streakers are likely to get tackled by security but rarely do the players get involved, they’re too scared of damaging their precious money-makers, but football players, they’ll knock you the fuck out.

[Boston Globe]

22
Dec
08

Brett Favre, Pro Bowl, Really?

Ladies and gentleman, your 2009 Pro Bowl backup quarterback, Brett Favre!

For your appreciation:

18/31, 187 yards, 0 touchdowns, 2 INTs

sacked 4 times

Completely unable to move the ball on one of the worst teams in the entire league.

Impressive.

Now, not to be a homer, nor to suggest that Matt Cassel SHOULD have been in the Pro Bowl, here are his comparable stats from this week.

20/36, 345 yards, 3 touchdowns, 0 INTs

1 Sack

Some wobbly throws

Scored on 9 of the first 11 possessions.

I could also pick the stats from last week which would show the same story. Again, I’m not so much advocating Cassel, I’d be fine if he made it but I’m not distraught he didn’t, as I am pointing out how embarrassing it is that Favre was selected to the team. Oh yeah, did I mention that Brett Favre has the most interceptions in football this year? Yeah. He does. 19 of them, to his 21 TD passes. That’s a GREAT ratio. So glad the Pro Bowl gets to have him. What a fucking waste. I hope Favre backs out of the game, it’s bad enough he was selected, there’s no way he should be going though.

22
Dec
08

HE COULD GO ALL THE WAY…to the Hospital

It’s BOWL SEASON! I know everyone is super-amped up for the Vagisil Monistat 7 Bowl Game and all the other fun games, I for one can’t even sleep I’m so excited. Freshman DeAndre Brown of the Southern Mississippi Golden Eagles may not look upon the bowl season the same way though. While his team beat Troy University 30-27 in overtime of the New Orleans Bowl, Brown wasn’t able to be much help to the team. A few plays after setting the school record for receptions in a season with his 67th, Brown went up for a reception in the end zone, but his leg awkwardly gives out and snaps. Ouch.  

School officials later would only say it was a lower leg fracture. You think? Brown, who was the Golden Eagles’ top recruit last season had a stellar freshman campaign ending the season with 67 catches for 1,108 yards and 12 touchdowns and one gruesome injury.

19
Dec
08

Shipley Goes for Famed 6-Year Plan

When I was going off to college, my high school’s college adviser wrote in my yearbook “Have a great 4-7 years in college, you’re gonna need it.” How right he was. Amazingly I defied the odds and finished in only 4 years, and learned a valuable lesson about the dangers of diet pills. So, really, win-win.

Jordan Shipley of the University of Texas Longhorns football team must have received similar advice. Shipley, currently a 5th year player at the school has applied for a 6th year of eligibility from the NCAA. Shipley missed two seasons due to injury, 2004-2005 and now wants to make up that lost time, with that elusive 6th year of college. “I think I deserve another year. I missed over two whole seasons,” Shipley said.

Sure, you absolutely “deserve” it. After all, you got to go to one of the best schools in Texas, for free, for now 5 years, they OWE you because you got hurt. I couldn’t agree more. It’s nice to see a young man who has the proper perspective on life. In other fun news people who were in 8th grade when Shipley started college are now his classmates. Fun!

[Fan Nation]

18
Dec
08

Friday Night Lights is Killer

No, I’m not talking about season 3 of NBC’s Friday Night Lights, which is AWESOME and returns to the high-quality standard of the perfect 1st season (don’t get me started on season 2), but the actual field of the Permian Panthers, on whom the Dillon Panthers are based. Based on testing done by the Environmental Protection Agency, Ratliff Stadium’s artificial turf field has levels of lead that are approximately 14 times the EPA standards. Another nearby school, in the Birdville district of Fort Worth also tested for high levels of lead, nearly 10 times the standard. Both stadiums feature the same kind of turf, known as AstroPlay, and the high lead levels were found in a secondary layer of nylon fiber known as the “root zone. Neither field had lead levels at the top level of the fields where players make contact, but the Birdville stadium had lead in the water running off the field, which is a sign that the lead is being released into the larger environment.

“Our opinion is that AstroPlay turf could pose a human health risk,” wrote Michael T. Abel, project manager at the Lubbock lab that conducted the test.

School officials in Birdville are monitoring the situation carefully, but also admitted that they don’t have the $300-400,000 needed to replace the 5-year old turf. Other stadiums in Texas have been shut down for lower levels of lead, as has a playground at a Beverly Hills, California which also featured AstroPlay.

The manufacturers of artificial turf dismiss charges that the fields are dangerous, contending that the lead is contained in fibers below the surface. The other side argues that as use and sunlight degrade the quality of the field the risks and dangers drastically increase.

Despite nearly a dozen other districts that feature AstroPlay turf fields, only Odessa and Birdville tested their fields, believing it not to be a major concern. “We’re not burying our head in the sand,” said Joe Loerwald, athletic director for the Round Rock school district outside Austin, which has an AstroPlay field. “But, at the same time, we don’t see it as a prevalent problem.”

Experts in the field, like Winifred Hamilton the director of environmental health at the Baylor College of Medicine in Houston disagree. “It seems to me that we’ve jumped into something without properly understanding it,” she said.

[Star Telegram]


18
Dec
08

Sweaters are BACK!

Based on this Christmas card from Texas Tech quarterback Graham Harrell (top left) he seems to have a decent sense of humor, or a really really bad sense of style. Supposedly this is a photo with some of his fraternity friends, but that isn’t for certain, nor am I 100% that it is Harrell, but c’mon, those sweaters are KILLER!

104144

Even though I hate college sports, I do love me a horrible sweater, and damned if there ain’t THREE awesomely terrible ones in this photo. It nearly brings a tear to my eye.

[The Sporting News]




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