I get accused sometimes of being anti-Mets, I’m not, I just think they have an awful GM, don’t care about their fans and have choked, viciously, the last two years. That’s not unfair right? However, I don’t give them enough props on the one thing they do better than anyone else in baseball; unique handshakes. Usually Jose Reyes has several and that’s the majority of the fun, but here is Mets ace Johan Santana making his way through the dugout, doing a special handshake with everyone. I’m impressed he remembers them all. The one with Alex Cora and taking off the hat is the best by the way.
Archive for the 'Baseball' Category
08
Apr
09
I Like Something Mets-Related!
07
Apr
09
FINALLY!
The news gathering agents in society have put together the most important clip of the day, the comparison of Vice President Joe Biden and former President Bush throwing out first pitches from yesterday. Now I can sleep.
07
Apr
09
Some Opening Day Doppelgangers
Opening Day means that the MLB Extra Innings preview is on, meaning I can watch games all day long. Ah happiness!
Watching the many games means I find many more doppelgangers, which means you win!
Also, not to get sidetracked but, I want to get the MLB package, except my goddamn Optimum cable service doesn’t have even ONE HD channel available. Optimum is the absolute WORST. I FUCKING HATE IT. I thought I disliked Time Warner, but compared to Optimum it isn’t even close. How can you not add ONE HD channel, Time Warner does it, DirecTV does it, Comcast does it. Why does Cablevision insist on being the WORST FUCKING CABLE COMPANY!
Anyways. Here’s the doppelgangers, as ever, please vote in both polls below and then visit the (RECENTLY REDESIGNED!) permanent doppelgangers page.
Once a part of one of the worst trades in baseball history, Jeff Bagwell went on to become a Hall of Fame caliber player, winning one MVP, and nearly winning two more. According to Bill James’ calculations, Bagwell is the 4th best first baseman of all time. He is also one of the few players in the modern era to play his entire MLB career with one team. Recently inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, James Hetfield fronts rock legends Metallica. Once considered one of the most bad-ass groups of all time, Hetfield and Metallica as a whole lost much of their luster after filming the documentary Metallica: Some Kind of Monster, where it was clear that the band was made up of a bunch of whiny complaining brats. Still, Metallica knows how to thrash, even if their image has been forever marred.
I acknowledge this one is somewhat laced with spite, but is also something I’ve believed for a while; Mark Teixeira has a horse face. Out to earn the most dollars, and proving multiple times in subsequent interviews that he is a duplicitous person, Mark Teixiera also possesses prodigious power in his bat, Gold Glove caliber defense and is yet to contribute in any meaningful way for a contender. He’s also now on his 4th team. Captain is the Texas Rangers’ mascot, a giant horse who wears number “72” honoring the year the team moved to the Dallas area. I guess the horse represents the gloriousness of Texas and its lawmen. I’m more surprised it isn’t a gun that shoots fireworks and pees liquor. Which would be a GREAT mascot by the way. Anyways, I find it hard to tell which one is the horse and which the man.
When the New York Mets decided to cut seating capacity by 26 percent the regular fans weren’t the only ones getting kicked in the junk, the Mets also were meting out pain to 1,200 Little Leaguers. For the past 4 years, Queens Little Leagues have been involved in their own special day at Shea Stadium complete with a pre-game ceremony where the kids would get to line up around the field. I’ve been to these games, and the kids are always super psyched and it is the best thing to ever happen to them. I’d go nuts if I could have done this when I was a kid. NUTS!
Recognizing that getting these young fans now means getting them for life, the Mets have decided to CUT the promotion. Smooth.
Even the government — well, a State Senator, Frank Padavan, who represents Queens — is getting involved. “Some things transcend dollars and cents,” Padavan wrote in a letter, “Mr. Wilpon, I urge you to think of the youngsters who for years have enjoyed a day at the ballpark with their friends, teammates, coaches and parents and reconsider and do the right thing for the children. It’s a rite of passage that will leave a lifetime of memories.”
The Mets are in discussions with the Little League organizers right now, offering the kids can buy tickets, at normal cost, have no parade on the field and no other special treatment. So essentially the Mets are telling these kids to go fuck themselves. I almost want all of these Little Leaguers to become Yankee fans just because the Mets are such assholes.
“In light of the fact that the New York Mets organization enjoys generous tax breaks and subsidies from the state and the city that helped finance and build Citi Field, I believe like many others, that it is imperative that you give something back to the Queens community,” Padavan continued in his letter. “Maintaining your commitment and providing the full and adequate amount of discounted tickets to area Little Leagues is a step in the right direction.”
It’s unclear whether Padavan signed off his letter with the “You Money Grubbing Asshole,” epithet that Wilpon deserves.
07
Apr
09
Let’s Hear it for the Dogs!
Opening Day yesterday is probably something of a holiday for the National Hot Dog and Sausage Council — a group whose BBQs you DEFINITELY want an invite to — after all, according to a statement they released, the NHDaSC predicts that 21,733,839 hot dogs will be sold at stadiums this season. That’s a whole lot of delicious pig anus!
Since everyone loves silly comparisons, the Council also explains that that many hot dogs would go around the bases 30,186 times and stretch to and from Citizens Bank Park in Philadelphia and Tropicana Field in St. Petersburg, FL, the two sites of the 2008 World Series.
Individually, the Fenway Frank is expected to be the best-selling and most popular dog in the land, with more than 1.5 million expected to be sold.
“There’s no question that hot dogs hit a grand slam year after year,” said Tom Super, spokesman for the Council. “The connection and nostalgia between hot dogs and baseball has been around for over a century. After all, hot dogs were Babe Ruth’s performance enhancing drug of choice.”
Buried in this press release were three other surprising items:
- They serve Rocky Mountain Oysters (fried bull testicles) at Coors Field in Denver
- The Phillie Phanatic has a specially made Hatfield Hot Dog Launcher that he uses to toss hot dogs into the stands.
- The Council is trying to amend “Take Me Out to the Ballgame” to include hot dogs in the lyrics.
It must be tough being Texas Rangers and Dallas Stars owner Tom Hicks, after all, he is only the 701st richest person in the world and that type of thing can really stick in your craw. So, maybe that’s the reason why his holding company, which controls the Rangers and Stars has defaulted on loans totaling $525 million.
Hicks insists the move was deliberate, as a business strategy to get the banks to change the lending agreements and provide access to reserve accounts and a revolving line of credit. He also said that the whole thing is a “nonevent for the teams, fans, sponsors and vendors.” Of course, this news comes after rumors that Hicks has been actively seeking selling as much as a 49% minority stake in both teams. “We are simply asking the lenders to be reasonable. “Hicks said in an issued statement, “They need to understand that these important assets must be managed with long-term perspective and a commitment to winning.” That’s an interesting strategy, one the Rangers have eschewed since about 1999…
07
Apr
09
No Beer for You
Fans who want to keep Les Bon Temps Roulez in Toronto after last night’s shellacking of the Detroit Tigers are going to find their thirsts unsatiated at the Rogers Centre. Due to prior infractions, the Alcohol and Gaming Commission of Ontario informed Rogers Centre officials that for today’s game, the April 21 game against the Rangers and a Toronto Argos-Winnipeg Blue Bombers CFL game on August 1st the building’s liquor license will be suspended. If fans have tickets for those games and the thought of going an entire game without booze is too much to bear, they can exchange the tickets at the Jays box office.
Like country music star Lyle Lovett! Say what you want about Lovett, but he somehow convinced Julia Roberts to elope with him after knowing him for all of three weeks, and his face looks like it was run through a blender, so that’s impressive…
06
Apr
09
Mission Accomplished: STRIKE!
I can’t decide what I love more; that Fox News broke in LIVE to see former President Bush throw the first pitch for today’s Rangers game, or the look on the female anchor’s face when they are going to the shot. It’s like her entire life has been waiting for this one very special moment.
Of course, the liberal elite media is hiding Biden’s first pitch offering; it isn’t available online yet. Say what you want about Bush, but the man consistently comes in for the First Pitch and throws strikes and really what more could you want from a leader.
In building their new stadiums, one would think that the Yankees and Mets would think forward and try to make their stadiums as energy-efficient as possible. Being sensible people, both teams instead made stadiums that require TWICE as much energy as the previous iterations. Smart move guys!
The two stadiums use as much electricity as 20,000 homes, with Citi Field clocking in at 11 megawatts, despite being smaller than Yankee stadium which draws a mere 9 megawatts. Shea Stadium only drew 5 megawatts of energy, meaning the new stadium draws nearly 120% more energy. Sure, part of the increase is because both stadiums feature more modern amenities, chief among them the giant HD scoreboards which require plenty of energy to power, but the lack of foresight from both teams regarding energy costs is staggering.
It’s not as though the move towards lowering energy costs is brand-new, or that stadiums can’t be green. The Nationals new stadium, which opened last season, was awarded a silver rating from the US Green Building Council for using 15% LESS energy than their previous home, RFK Stadium. That reduction leads to a savings of over $440,000 per year for the Nats to not spend on improving their team, isn’t that something either NYC team might want too? Of course, neither team sought even to be certified as “green,” and the new Giants stadium being built also has no intention of being so certified. Nicely done guys, seriously, the rest of the planet thanks you for your arrogance and overall douchery.
[NY Post]
05
Apr
09
It’s Opening Night!
And what better way to celebrate than with a bikini’d hottie blowing a giant inflatable Dodgers baseball. Right?
Baseball is about as individual a sport as a team game can be, and so here we’ll pick out our choices on who should be honored with their own hardware. We’ll also be making our picks on who will take home the most important title of them all; World Series Champion. Hope on board after the jump and please leave a comment letting us know everything we’re wrong about. Then, in late September, we’ll get a chance to take a look back and see just how wrong we were, because if there is anything you can count on with the baseball season, it’s that ANYTHING can happen.
Continue reading ‘This Year in Baseball – Awards and Postseason Predictions’
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