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03
Aug
09

Yankees Go Green With Envy

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Awesome, Baseball and Douches
Tags: , , ,

Carl Pavano was so ineffectual and rarely seen on the field for the New York Yankees that the team’s DL became derisively known as the “Pavano.” In 4 seasons as a Yankee, Pavano won a grand total of 9 games, meaning that the Yanks effectively paid him $4+ million per win. This season, after signing a 1-year $1.5 million contract with the Indians, Pavano has already won 9 games this season, in 20 less innings than he threw over the course of Yankees tenure.

The Yankees clearly are disappointed, so much so they’ve gone green with envy — or at least their old home has. The destruction of the old Yankee Stadium is taking a little while, and in the meantime, nature has weeded her way back in. Where once fat, obnoxious, disgusting New York Yankees fans bellowed and hollered, now weeds, vines and other fauna are working their way through the concrete.

4853242

[WCBS]

31
Jul
09

You Wouldn’t Hit a Girl Would You?

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Awesome, Other Sports and Random
Tags: , , ,

SNN2015FRK-280_848885aWhen Rickey “The Hitman” Hatton trains for a fight, he calls on a 20-year boxing veteran by the name of Rob Newbiggin to spar with, at least, for now. Later this month Newbiggin will appear in his final male professional fight before beginning the process of becoming a woman by the name of Mercedes.

After the various operations and such, Newbiggin intends to apply for a female license from the Boxing Board to continue his trade. Married with three kids, Newbiggin, 44, has jousted in both the featherweight and super-middleweight classes. His wife Emma, 27, and children are standing by him, unlike his friends and neighbors.

I have lost every friend I have ever had in this town. I’ve got people winding car windows down shouting abuse at me on my daily run. But Emma has been my rock. She understands what I’m going through and we are going to stay together. At the end of all this, I will be the woman I want to be. While I am going through the transformation, my kids will not see me as Mercedes. But it doesn’t matter in the end whether I’m a mother or a father, as long as I’m a good parent.

I love it, I mean, I don’t exactly see this dude as being a particularly attractive chick, but he’s already married so, it’s not like he’s hitting the bar scene. And besides, Mercedes Newbiggin is a totally great name!

[Daily Star]

31
Jul
09

HEAD! MOVE!

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Awesome, People Hurting Themselves and Soccer
Tags:

I definitely had this happen to me a couple dozen times as a kid. Of course, you wouldn’t know it talking to me. Bumper cars gogglegoth blopker.

This video never stops being funny to me.

[With Leather]

31
Jul
09

Bat Man Takes in a Bisons/PawSox Game

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Awesome and Baseball
Tags: , ,

batbatcrowdDespite having gone to many baseball games I have never caught a foul ball. Not since a Little League game have I managed to snag one, I was close twice, but never close enough. I’ve certainly never been in a good enough spot to score a bat if one of the hitters accidentally let loose. I would be way WAY more psyched to get a bat than a ball. Plus, catching a bat is about 78% more bad-ass.

However, the Erie County Health Department is trying to find an as yet unknown fan who caught a live bat at a AAA game between the Buffalo Bisons and Pawtucket Red Sox. During Tuesday’s game the man reached out and snagged the nominally nocturnal creature, much to the chagrin of some health department employees who were also in the stands.

The brave fan released the bat after holding it for a brief time.

[Newsday]

31
Jul
09

Don’t Stop ‘Til You Get Enough

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Awesome and Soccer
Tags: , , ,

Athletes are always taught to play until the whistle, what happens when the referee falls and can’t whistle? Japanese soccer team Sagan Tosu found out the hard way.

Deep in Sagan’s zone, Kim Tae-yeon, playing for Mito Hollyhock — it feels almost silly having to say that considering the HUGE Japanese soccer fans that visit — ignored the referee tripping over himself and scored a nifty goal. The Sagan players were more sensitive to the plight of the official, to their detriment.

Let this be a lesson to the kids out there. Damn the man.

[Sports Rubbish]

31
Jul
09

When Life Hands You Lemons

By slanch 2 Comments
Categories: Awesome and Hockey
Tags: , ,

When true love comes along, if you’re smart, you lock it down and put a ring on it. Alas, for one Pittsburgh resident, that plan didn’t go too well. “Scott” put this ad up on the Pittsburgh’s Craigslist barter board:

Markee cut with 12 little diamonds,Appraised @ 2,500,will take a 1,000 cash or
1,500 dollars worth of penguins tickets must be good seats

engagementrings

Even after crawling through a river of shit, Scott is able to look forward to watching the reigning Stanley Cup champions; he’s a pillar of strength for all men who go through hard times. Scott may have lost the girl he loved, but he still has his team. They’ll get him through this; but don’t get ridiculous, he still wants “good seats.”

Go get ’em buddy, you deserve it!

and in case the link gets taken down, I have a screenshot of it here.

31
Jul
09

Jose Rijo Finds a New Career Path

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Awesome, Baseball and Poor Governing
Tags: , ,

jose_rijoSo, what path do you take if you are fired from your last job for suspected fraud and a series of irregularities? If you’re former major leaguer and then former Washington Nationals executive Jose Rijo, you turn to politics. Which, I suppose makes sense, if you’re already used to shaking down baseball prospects it’s a relatively easy step up to fleecing an entire city.

Formerly serving in the front-office of the Nationals, with responsibilities including over-seeing the team’s Dominican academy — out of which came a prospect with a forged identity and a series of questions regarding skimming of bonuses from player — Rijo was less than stellar and canned by the team in an attempt to avoid further (legal) problems.

Rijo is now running to become the mayor of his Dominican hometown, San Cristobal where he campaigns door-to door nearly every day. “Here [in the US], he’s been somewhat humiliated,” a source close to Rijo said, “but down there [in the Domincan] he’s still like the Godfather, larger than life.”

Raul_Mondesi_0001The competition to become mayor though will be tough as Rijo faces off against another former big leaguer, none other than Raul Mondesi!

God, I hope they hold dozens of debates and they are all televised. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE. And, in case you were wondering, for his career, Mondesi went 3-9 against Rijo with a double and 3 punchados.

[Washington Post]

30
Jul
09

eBay Really Does Have Everything

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Awesome and Soccer
Tags: , ,

_44936633_tranmere_226The Tranmere Rovers, who reside in Prenton area of Birkenhead, England play in League One, two divisons down from the English Premier League and are currently for sale. Club Chairman Peter Johnson however is none too pleased for the manner in which the sale is being handled. He awoke yesterday to find out that Dornoch Capital, the US firm he had hired to facilitate the sale had placed the team on eBay with a starting bid of $10m.

We were appalled,” Johnson told BBC Radio Merseyside.

It’s totally inappropriate. We immediately e-mailed them and said ‘take it off right away’. You can imagine how shocked we were to wake up this morning to find out we were on eBay. We’ll be considering [Dornoch Capital’s] mandate. It’s not a second-hand bike we’re selling.

I don’t think we want this sort of publicity and I think a lot of people knew it was for sale because the local paper mentioned it at the beginning of last season.

If they can find the right buyer then he can take over at Tranmere but its got to be the right buyer and I don’t think putting it on eBay is going to find the right buyer.

Interesting about the Rovers, they are also nicknamed the Super Whites, leading their fans to call themselves the Super White Army, which isn’t terrifying in any way…

[BBC Sports]

30
Jul
09

My, How Manly You Are

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Awesome, Other Sports and Random
Tags: , , ,

Rugby is a game with plenty of room for physical violence, and not just for the players on the field. The Manly Sea Eagle, team mascot for Manly Warringah in the Australian Rugby League decided to get in on the action when a fan tried to make his way onto the field. The security forces pounced on the errant fan, but watch the Eagle as he gets in a series of good punches as the fan lays prone on the ground. Way to live up to your team’s name!

29
Jul
09

Buehrle Celebrates Perfection With Whisky

By slanch 2 Comments
Categories: Awesome and Baseball
Tags: , , ,

Buehrle-Wise-Crown-Royal-XRWhen he pitched his first no-hitter, Mark Buehrle purchased watches for all of his teammates and coaches as a “thank you” gift for being a part of his moment. After pitching the 18th perfect game in MLB history last Thursday, Buehrle took the time to get another gift for his teammates, this time purchasing each of them a specially packaged bottle of Crown Royal XR.

Each bottle came with embroidery on the velvet pouch saying “Thank you,” the players name, Mark Buerhle Perfect Game and July 23, 2009. Pretty neat!

That said, DeWayne Wise who made one of the best catches of the year, let alone the best catch ever to preserve a perfect game, just gets a bottle of liquor just like everyone else. C’mon Buehrle, you have a $56 million contract, let’s throw something a bit more impressive at DeWayne than just a $140 bottle of liquor, he saved your perfecto! Buy him a car or something, I mean, REALLY!

[Home Run Derby]

29
Jul
09

Wild Horses Want to Roam Free

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Awesome, Other Sports and Random
Tags: ,

mustangOne of the most iconic of American cars, the Ford Mustang will make its debut in NASCAR racing next season. In addition the Dodge Challenger, Toyota Camry and Chevy Impala SS builds will be making their way onto the track.

While the Mustang has participated in racing before, this is the first time it will grace the NASCAR courses. 

I couldn’t care less about NASCAR, but I do think this Mustang model is pretty awesome. Look at how dope that is!

[Detroit Free Press]

28
Jul
09

Cuz This is THRILLER

By slanch 4 Comments
Categories: Awesome, Baseball and Pop Culture
Tags: , , ,

When you show up to a minor league game and get stuck in a rain delay, there isn’t much entertainment left for you. Unless you were at the Long Palm Beach Cardinals game the other day where Casey Mulligan, an infielder relief pitcher took to the field and did a damn fine Thriller dance. Replete with single batting glove, Mulligan goes all out, it’s just a shame that whoever is videotaping it is with a talkative annoying little kid. I wanna see the moves son! Just because you were born 20 years after the song came out doesn’t mean you have to ruin it for the rest of us.

The Cardinals would be smart to immediately reward Mulligan and bump him up a level.

[With Leather]

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