You were probably so busy over the weekend that you didn’t get a chance to watch as closely as normally would the Lamb Weston Columbia Cup boat races. I know that feeling. Well here is all the recap you need to see, J. Michael Kelly flipping his boat during the first preliminary heat
Archive for the 'Awesome' Category
28
Jul
09
HYDRO-THUUUUUNNNNDDDDEEEEER
In Birmingham, England, a city councilor is under fire for writing a blog entry advising fans on how best to smuggle alcohol into the Edgbaston cricket arena.
Sandwell Council’s Bob Piper wrote a blog revealing his “foolproof method of smuggling a decent drink” into the grounds. Entitled “Defying the Edgbaston drinks ban”, the blog at bobpiper.co.uk claims alcohol can be taken past security guards using a bizarre method involving a plastic box and tomatoes.
The Labour councillor writes: “If you like a bit of a tipple during the match, Edgbaston can be a bit of a nightmare on test match day, because they search everyone’s bags on the way in and confiscate any alcohol at the gate or refuse you entry.
“It’s not as if alcohol is banned or anything, it is just that Warwickshire County Cricket Club want you to splash out on buying their alcohol, which is OK if you want a bottle of Moet for about 50 notes, or pints of frozen Carling fizzy lager.”
He then advises readers to remove the cardboard case from a three-litre box of wine, before hiding the silver foil container inside in a plastic lunchbox covered with tomato.
He continues: “There you have it, friends. Tuck it in to your rucksack with a packet of crisps and a couple of glasses… and you should have plenty to sustain until at least the lunchtime session. And after that we crack open Chrissie’s tea flask and enjoy a drop of fine Guinness. Works every time for me.”
The Warwickshire County Cricket Club was obviously less then pleased, saying, “Whilst it is disappointing to hear reports of these comments, the ground regulations are quite clear for this match and have been in place for some time and will be applied as normal.” I fucking LOVE England, do you think you’d ever see a press release from an American sports institution that led off with “Whilst”?
Ever the opportunists, a spokesperson for charity Drinkaware said: “What’s the point in buying Ashes tickets if you don’t fully appreciate it because you’re drinking? And what if that crucial wicket that changes the destiny of the series falls while you’re at the bar or in the toilet?”
I can’t begin to count how many crucial wickets I’ve missed because I was at the bar. Thousands probably. What a fool I’ve been.
[24 Dash]
28
Jul
09
The Kings Dancers Take the Floor
The Sacramento Kings finalized their 2009 dance team the other day, whittling down the numbers from over 100 hopefuls to the chosen 15. It looks like they made some fine choices, I for one prefer Carly and the delightful cute redheaded Laura. You know, for their dancing abilities. And their brains! I’m a brain man.
28
Jul
09
Zebras Take Linebacker Out
Confusingly-named Pittsburg State University in Kansas is down a player for next season after sophomore Joe Windscheffel suffered a compound fracture in his forearm that required six pins and a plate. Windscheffel was painting a fence at a farm the other day when he was attacked by some of the livestock and dragged by the arm for some distance until two fellow farm hands were able to free him.
Of course, these weren’t the normal livestock we’re used to hearing about in “Old McDonald,” Windscheffel was working at a zebra farm. Just like a player, Windscheffel claims that the zebra’s attack on him was unprovoked. When he entered the pasture, the 6’2″ 225 lb linebacker/safety had to move the three female and one male zebras out of the way in order get at the fence. Apparently the male took umbrage and launched a teeth baredattack.
Windscheffell is now out for the entire season, which is especially unfortunate considering he red-shirted his entire freshman year due to an Achilles injury, meaning the Pittsburg State Gorillas.
[KCTV]
27
Jul
09
He’s a Long-Range Assassin
You simply have to love a good long-range soccer shot. Now, my only question is the goalie actually hurt or just laying on the ground in embarrassment at having let in a goal from the half-line?
Vodpod videos no longer available.
27
Jul
09
Mind if I Play Through
For the troops there probably aren’t many opportunities for fun while being stationed in Kandahar, Afghanistan. Thanks to some Canadians though, that has changed somewhat. Bill Pigden, a retired major who now works as the civilian manager at the Canadian Forces’ Personnel Support Agency at the Kandahar Air Force Base decided to honor the 100th anniversary of the Canadian Open, which was also held this weekend.
In order to do so, he trucked in 4 loads of sand, nearly 2000 feet of Astroturf carpeting and worked with a full team of helpers in order to create a miniaturized exact replica of the Glen Abbey Golf Club in Oakville, Ontario where the actual Canadian Open was being held. “We’ve reconstructed it down to the correct scale . . . with the exception of water and trees. Not a lot of those,” said Pigden.
Unlike their countrymen who were slogging through soggy courses, that wasn’t a problem in Afghanistan. “We just have 50-degree heat to deal with,” Pigden said. It took three days for Pigden and crew to lay out the course, but it was well worth it. They held a tournament, with an entry price of $20 and ended raising $1,500 for Soldier On, a charity that helps wounded soldiers get involved in paralympic sports.
“I think it’s just a wonderful replica, a great idea,” said Lt.-Col. Kevin Bryski, chief of staff with the Afghan Regional Security Integration Command South, and an avid golfer. “Working here in Afghanistan is quite a long toil. We have a lot of work to do here . . .Having opportunities like this to vent a little bit and get out and have some fun on the golf course with your comrades . . . it’s just a wonderful opportunity.”
Of course, Pigden won his own tournament, taking home a trophy and a baseball hat, besting the other 35 competitors. The tournament organizers also challenged fellow Canadian golfers, like Mike Weir, to match their charitable contribution.
24
Jul
09
This Day in History
5 years ago today the fortunes of the Boston Red Sox changed forever. As a birthday present from my lovely sisters, we went to the last game of a series between the Red Sox and Yankees. Every game was heated, full of passion and dislike for the opposing side.
When we got to the stadium it wasn’t 100% that the game was going to be played. Rain had come through during the night and stuck around, but fortunately by mid-afternoon it had disappeared.
With Bronson Arroyo on the mound facing off against Tanyon Sturtze all of us in attendance knew we were in for a pitching duel…
Under the overhang, about 35 rows from the Pesky Pole, my sisters and I got into the game. With 2 outs in the top of the 3rd inning, up 3-0, Alex Rodriguez strode to the plate. With adrenaline pumping, Arroyo ended up flinging a pitch in that struck A-Rod on the shoulder. Alex took exception to that, despite him struggling at the plate; he believed that the pitch was purposeful. It wasn’t. After jawing at Bronson for a moment, catcher Jason Varitek stood up and got in Alex’s face. A-Rod challenged Varitek, the two of them threw some F-bombs in each other’s face and then BOOM, ‘Tek’s mitt and fist met in the middle of A-Rod’s face and the brawl was on.
I stood up on my chair quite literally screaming for blood. “I WANT TO SEE A-ROD BLLLEEEEEEEEEEEED,” hurled forth from me. “A-Rod is a Tool” was my next chant and I got my whole section in on it. The brawl was excellent, the Red Sox took command of the situation but they still remained behind in runs.
The game got crazy from there, entering the 9th with the Yankees still up, although the lead was whittled down to 9-8. Mariano Rivera, Mr Automatic came in to boos and disgust from the Fenway Faithful. Our exuberance from the fight still was there but the back-and-forth of the game had left many drained. Did the Sox have a little more moxie in them?
Entering the game, Rivera was in the midst of one of the greatest seasons by a closer, his ERA was a miniscule 0.89, in 50 innings all season he had given up 1 HR. In his entire career Rivera had given up 1 walk-off home run. With Dave McCarty on first, still down a run, and with 1 out, up came Bill Mueller. Before he got to the plate I turned to my sisters and said, “Watch this, he’s going to hit a home run.” Mostly all wishful thinking, I wanted the Sox win and I had Mueller on my Fantasy team and could really have used the HR. Down in the count 3-1, Rivera let loose with another of his famous cutters.
The pitch comes in, CRACK! The ball flies in the air; stuck under the pavilion I couldn’t see the flight of the ball, so I RAN down the aisle tracking it in the air. I reached the edge of the roof just in time to see the ball sail into the Red Sox bullpen. YES! WE WIN! I start screaming. I high-5 the rando standing in his seat next to me, he’s going crazy. I’m going crazy! I run up the aisle high-5’ing everyone. The stadium is ROCKING, the entire building is alive. We came back. It was the single best game of baseball I’ve ever been to.
Of course, that single game changed everything. The mystique was gone, Rivera was mortal. When the ALCS rolled around and it came down to the bottom of the 9th in game 4, once more it was Bill Mueller up against Rivera. The memory of July 24th rang out in my brain. “We’re going to do it!” I knew we would come back. We had to. It was meant to be.
All thanks to July 24th, 2004, the date of the best baseball game I’ve ever been to and I was there.
[WEEI]
As a means to promote awareness and get more men screened for prostate cancer, the Tampa Bay Rays will hold free screenings Thursday at Tropicana Field before the game.
For participating in the test, men will receive 2 free tickets to a game during the team’s August 18-23 home-stand. Last year more than 400 men came and were checked out as part of the same event.
Starting at 7 am, the screenings will take place in the center field concourse, which is exactly where I would want a stranger’s finger to be inserted into my anus.
As important as prostate screens are, there HAS to be an easier/better way to get free tickets to a game…
22
Jul
09
Ow, My Face
Here’s Jens Voight taking a brutal digger during the Tour de France and going way too far via the asphalt-face means of travel. I thought it was a BIKE race…
Vodpod videos no longer available.
On July 10th, I called in to WEEI, Boston’s sports radio to discuss potential trade targets for the Red Sox. At the time I suggested they ignore going after Roy Halladay and instead concentrate, now or in the off-season on prying Adrian Gonzalez off the Padres. I also posted about it here. On the radio the hosts curtly got off the phone with me, saying that I was being ridiculous and making no sense; well Hall of Famer Peter Gammons, one of the most respected names in baseball agrees with me as he says in his latest article on ESPN:
Considering Boston’s young pitching and the Padres’ lack of it (although 21-year-old right-hander Mat Latos threw 96 mph Sunday), a multi-prospect deal for Adrian Gonzalez makes sense for both teams. The Padres’ ownership is worried about the public perception if the team were to trade away Gonzalez. Fans? What fans?
Now, this isn’t to say Gammo is always right, but the fact that I’m on the same wavelength as him, and considering his sources and contacts within the Red Sox organization, I’d say I’m just a wee bit justified in saying to WEEI that I know more than they do.
21
Jul
09
Might as Well JUMP
BJ Penn is a 30 year old MMA fighter who tops out at a mere 5’9″ which makes this stunt of his all the more impressive. Sure, it’s only 3 feet of water, but I sure as hell can’t do this and I doubt any of you can either.
Brazil exports many goods around the world, and it was about time that the US gets our trade deficit more in order by sending them something of great value back, cheerleaders! Do you know what happens when you take the hottest national population and then add cheerleaders into the mix? Well, here’s the answer.
Have I mentioned how much I love Brazil?
[Fleshbot] (link NSFW)
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