Archive for January 29th, 2009

29
Jan
09

Manny Gets a Two Year Offer!

The Worcester Tornadoes of the Can-Am Baseball league have officially offered Manny Ramirez a 2 year contract and are awaiting word from Scott Boras as to if Manny’ll accept it or not.

“I feel Manny would really enjoy playing in Worcester and hitting in our ballpark. Although I would be concerned about the cars traveling on I-290 during his at bats, it’s a risk worth taking,” said General Manager, Jorg Bassiacos.

Everything is in place for the Tornadoes to handle the circus that Manny attracts, manager Rich Gedman, a long-time major leaguer himself is well used to the media crush and should be helpful to Manny. Not only that, playing in Worcester would bring Manny back to the Massachusetts area so he can reunite with the fans he alienated when he forced his way off the Red Sox. The offer, 2 years for $24,000, is the highest offer possible with the salary-cap structure of the Can-Am league and would place Manny in the upper echelon of salaries with other veterans in the league.

I think this is the mystery team Boras always talks about!

[MLN Sports]

29
Jan
09

What Recession?

edgecarblogEdgerrin James missed out on winning a Super Bowl with the Colts, somehow, right after he left they won; so, to celebrate his being in the game this year, he went out and bought himself a new Lamborghini for his time in Tampa. Makes sense to me!

At first people around Tampa were saying that Edge just rented the car for the week, something he found laughable and ridiculous.

“Cash, straight out the door!” Edge told Darren Urban of AzCardinals.com.

If that weren’t classic enough Urban overheard James telling teammates “Hey, Urb wanted to know if I rented! I only rent tents and bouncehouses.”

I love bounce houses! Edge, call me next time you have a party!

[Fanster via AzCardinals.com]

29
Jan
09

Roger Clemens’ Balls of Fury

So everyone is harping on Joe Torre’s book and that Yankee players called Alex Rodriguez, A-Fraud to which I have only this to say, “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRING.” However, lost amid the hubbub was this bit of reporting that Tom Verducci, Torre’s co-writer, dug up about Roger Clemens.

It seems that Clemens’ had quite the pre-game ritual. For example, before game 2 of the 2000 World Series, Clemens would get into the hot tub at the hottest temperature possible, coming out looking like a lobster. Then it gets weird.

Then [Yankees trainer Steve] Donahue would rub the hottest possible liniment on his testicles.

“He’d start snorting like a bull,” the trainer said. “That’s when he was ready to pitch.”

Uh.

Um…

Roge, you made another man rub liniment on your balls before you pitched? No wonder he was so pumped for the game. It wasn’t steroids it was just his testicles being on fire!

I’m actually just impressed that the trainer was able to FIND Clemens’ tiny balls enough to rub ointment on them in the first place.

I have to imagine that the first time Clemens approached the trainer asking him to rub ben-gay on Clemens’ balls was quite the banner moment for that trainer…

[Fan IQ]

29
Jan
09

MMM…Bacon Wall…

This has been making the rounds today, and rightly so, because it is freaking awesome. I hope the Super Bowl festivities I attend at LEAST have something this extravagant. However, I feel confident that just looking at this gives you diabetes.

1-another-good-finished

I just hope the security people are paying attention, those Cheeto’s in the end zone look like they might start getting out of hand. And in case you were thinking of making this yourself, here’s the full list of ingredients:

Ingredients:
The Field:
1 Pound of Guacamole
15 Oz. Queso Dip For The Steelers End Zone
15 Oz. Salsa For The Cardinals End Zone
2 Oz. Sour Cream for the Field Lines
The Players:
15 Vienna Sausages
Helmets – 3 Oz. Sharp Cheddar Cheese
The Goal Posts:
1 Slim Jim for Each Goal Post
1 Oz. Monterey Jack Cheddar To Anchor (each)
The Stands:
58 Twinkies
1 Pound of Bacon
1 Bag of Nacho Cheese Doritos
1 Bag of Cheetos
1 Bag of Corn Tortilla Chips
1 Bag of Chex Mix
The Blimp:
20 Oz. Football-Shaped Summer Sausage (optional) (on second thought, no, this isn’t optional. Go buy one.)
stadium-w-blimp
TOTAL CALORIES: 24,375
TOTAL GRAMS OF FAT: 1,285
TOTAL COST: $86.47



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