Archive for the 'College' Category



02
Oct
09

I Always Preferred the Red Kind

3557444We have a new favorite in the Best Name in College Sports competition, meet red-shirted sophomore Gelo Orange from Wake Forest. A linebacker by trade, Orange has several blocked punts on his resume, once of which was integral in the Demon Deacon’s victory over Boston College last November. Originally from Haiti, Orange moved to Florida in 2004 to live with his father, and that is when he took up football.

[Wake Forest Sports]

28
Sep
09

She Must Be Holding it For Someone Else

Nicely done Des Moines Register, together we can all promote underage drinking! I for one am SHOCKED and HORRIFIED to find out that a college student not aged 21 was drinking any sort of alcohol. Although, now that I think about it, does Keystone Light even really count as beer, I mean, it’s like 98 % water anyways…

UnderageDrinker[Des Moines Register]

28
Sep
09

You Have to Protect What’s Important to You

University of Minnesota’s Simoni Lawrence’s hustle doesn’t stop, he follows the play all the way to the sidelines no matter what the personal cost. If it means falling into the sticks on the sidelines, so be it; if it means telling your coach “Motherfucker hit my penis,” and then walking it off, so be it. At the least your coach will appreciate you using a clinical  term for your man-cannon rather than some colloquial slang.

26
Sep
09

Well, I’m Inspired…

Here is some fan of the West Virginia sports program desperate to revive what could be the most boring and uninspiring “cheer” for a team ever. Hey, it died for a reason, let it go!

Seriously, not only is that slow and boring, but it’s among the lamest things I’ve ever seen; no wonder they stopped doing it.

26
Sep
09

This Doesn’t Smell Like a Rose

derrick20roseAccording to the NCAA, a player from the Memphis University Tigers, who only played on the team for the 2007-08 season before leaving (to go to the NBA) had someone else take his SATs in order to get him into college. That description only fits one member of the team, 2009 NBA rookie of the year, Derrick Rose who continues to insist he did nothing wrong.

“I took it, I took it,” he told reporters Friday. However, when pressed if he could remember his score, from a test presumably taken 2 years ago, he couldn’t recall it, adding “I don’t even remember my last report card.”

He probably can’t remember because college athletics are a joke for stars like him and he probably never went to class or took anything difficult. As smooth as Rose is on the court, his logic off it isn’t so good

“I wasn’t worried about anybody saying I didn’t take [the test],” he said. “If that’s the case, somebody would have then said it.” Well, somebody DID say it, the NCAA; yes the person who actually took the test hasn’t come forward, but that doesn’t change the evidence which points directly to him having someone else take the entrance exam for him.

Not that it matters, he used the school as the one-year delaying mechanism that the NBA has required and they used him to make millions of dollars. Win-win.

[ESPN]

21
Sep
09

Tim Tebow Needs a New Speechwriter

Now, I’m all for plagiarizing, I mean, hey, it’s fun! However, if you’re going to plagiarise, do it from someone and something worthwhile, copying Jon Voight from Varsity Blues doesn’t cut it.

Tim Tebow, whose shit don’t stink in the eyes of Florida should learn this post-haste. This was his locker-room speech last week and while the team won, I wager it was NOT because of this parroted speech.

I particularly love the look of the players right behind Tebow who clearly could care less about what he’s saying and have a “I can’t believe he’s using a Varsity Blues speech and thinks it is going to psyche us up” look on their faces.

14
Sep
09

Rode Hard and Put Away Wet

The University of Virginia Cavaliers took to their home field this past weekend, prior to kickoff as the team was getting ready to run out, first came the team mascot, a fabulously dressed Cavalier on a horse. This man rode his steed hard, apparently TOO hard because it doesn’t quite go how he expected.

[Barstool Sports]

14
Sep
09

That’s a Rather Large Margin of Victory

2009_football_guide_coverStephen F. Austin University on Saturday took their 0-1 record in to Nacogoches, Texas for their game against Texas College. The TC Steers started the game off strong driving all the way to the SFA 3 yard line until senior Cory Barlow intercepted the ball.

It would be the only good drive of the game for TC as SFA saw their 2 quarterbacks combine for 438 yards passing and 8(!!!!!) touchdowns en route to their 92-0 win. At halftime the score was 50-0 and SFA set a new school record for most points scored in a single game.

In total, the Lumberjacks piled up 603 yards of offense, holding Texas to a mere 92 for the whole game.

Yowzers. Looks like Texas was a wee bit overmatched.

[AP]

14
Sep
09

Almost Made It

This isn’t new — it’s from 2006 — but it is hilarious. What better way to start off a Monday than by enjoying some drunk LSU fans, a slip-‘n-slide and disaster?

08
Sep
09

It’s a Banner Play for the Punter!

On Saturday the college football season got underway, with most of the major programs playing. Famed and once-mighty Michigan ran out on their home field to start the season en masse. 5th-year punter Zoltan Mesko — to show off his majestic punter athleticism– jumps up to touch the banner hanging over the field.

Alas, he doesn’t stick the landing and instead gets trampled by his teammates. Looks like a long season is ahead for Michigan…

Keep your eye on the left side of the screen as they run out.

[Blitz Corner]

08
Sep
09

Stumbling Bumbling for the Score!

Here is Idaho Vandal Princeton McCarty taking a handoff about 80 yards to the house. He breaks away from the New Mexico State defense early and has nothing but open space in front of him; no one could tackle him.

No person that is. Instead, McCarty gets tripped up by the ground, falling about 8 yards out of the end zone and ending up tumbling in for six points. I love LOVE watching people falling.

The judges weren’t overwhelmed by his form though which is going to hurt him come medal time…

[KMVT]

04
Sep
09

It’s Over When the Game is Over

Last night college football’s season began. Hooray. I guess. It’s not an exciting thing for me, or anyone else who likes seeing GOOD football being played. But it happened. The game between Oregon and Boise State ended with Boise State coming out on top, much to the chagrin of the Ducks.

Senior running back LeGarrette Blount of Oregon in particular had a rough game, finishing with -5 yards on 8 carries and was tackled for a safety. Not a highlight reel game. During the spring he was also suspended from the team for an academic issue.

I would expect to see him suspended again since after yesterday’s game he went for the trifecta. He sucker-punched a Boise State player, shoved and tried to fight a teammate, then he went after the fans before he was dragged off the field by an assistant coach and security people. He’s got some FIGHT!

What he probably DOESN’T have anymore is a place on the team.




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