Posts Tagged ‘University of Florida

18
Nov
09

No One Likes to See a Sad (Game) Cock

I love crowd shots where you see unhappy fans; providing of course that I am not rooting for one of those sad-inducing teams. Here is an especially displeased University of South Carolina fan putting the cock in Game Cocks as a slew of Florida fans around him celebrate.

04
Nov
09

This QB’s Sack is Being Taken Care Of

This is the absolute BEST sports-related Halloween costume I’ve seen this year, well besides the incredibly hot girls who dress up as refs, but that doesn’t really count. University of Florida’s Tim Tebow was anointed as the greatest college quarterback ever by the media hordes who can’t slobber his knob fast enough despite the fact that he simply isn’t that good a quarterback according to all of the NFL.

Tim Tebow Halloween CostumeI absolutely love this. I also cannot wait for the greatest QB to enter the NFL and proceed to be worse than Danny Wuerfful.

[Sports by Brooks]

02
Nov
09

The Eyes are the Window to the Soul

Ah the cheap shot, a valuable part of football, especially college football where youthful exuberance, lack of talent and just being a douche coalesce. University of Florida linebacker Brandon Spikes is expected to be a top pick in this year’s NFL draft, but that doesn’t stop him from viciously going after Georgia running back Washaun Ealey’s eyes during the tackle.

Look, I get that gouging an eye is fun, but it’s lame and cheap too. I’m going to assume Washaun has really pretty eyes and Brandon just wanted to be able to look into them every day.

21
Sep
09

Tim Tebow Needs a New Speechwriter

Now, I’m all for plagiarizing, I mean, hey, it’s fun! However, if you’re going to plagiarise, do it from someone and something worthwhile, copying Jon Voight from Varsity Blues doesn’t cut it.

Tim Tebow, whose shit don’t stink in the eyes of Florida should learn this post-haste. This was his locker-room speech last week and while the team won, I wager it was NOT because of this parroted speech.

I particularly love the look of the players right behind Tebow who clearly could care less about what he’s saying and have a “I can’t believe he’s using a Varsity Blues speech and thinks it is going to psyche us up” look on their faces.




Follow The Slanch Report

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 19 other followers

Sign Our Petition!

The Slanch Report has started an online petition asking the MLB Network to air the Dock Ellis no-hitter he threw on June 12, 1970 against the San Diego Padres. The moment was a seminal piece of baseball history and is certainly worthy of being rerun.

Please join us in this cause and sign the petition below so we can all share in this special and fantastic moment of baseball history. THANKS!
SIGN THE PETITION HERE! AND PLEASE TELL YOUR FRIENDS AND PASS THIS ALONG!

October 2021
M T W T F S S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031

Categories