The University of Virginia Cavaliers took to their home field this past weekend, prior to kickoff as the team was getting ready to run out, first came the team mascot, a fabulously dressed Cavalier on a horse. This man rode his steed hard, apparently TOO hard because it doesn’t quite go how he expected.
Archive for the 'People Hurting Themselves' Category
14
Sep
09
Rode Hard and Put Away Wet
On Saturday the college football season got underway, with most of the major programs playing. Famed and once-mighty Michigan ran out on their home field to start the season en masse. 5th-year punter Zoltan Mesko — to show off his majestic punter athleticism– jumps up to touch the banner hanging over the field.
Alas, he doesn’t stick the landing and instead gets trampled by his teammates. Looks like a long season is ahead for Michigan…
Keep your eye on the left side of the screen as they run out.
Formerly loyal commenter myummers used to work as a ball-boy at the US Open matches in Flushing, while he may not have the gracefulness of a ballerina, I am confident that something like this has never happpened to him.
During Andy Murray and Ernests Gulbis’ match last night the broadcast crew was given this delightful treat of a ball-boy trying to get off the court quickly by jumping over a sideline advertisement and instead falling FLAT on his face.
Are there funnier things than people falling, because I don’t know what they are. I’m also shocked that such an epic fail in Flushing didn’t involve the Mets!
Adrian Beltre is in his free agent year and his expected contract push was just starting to heat up when his season was tragically derailed. In Wednesday’s game against the White Sox, Beltre took a one-hopper straight into his junk.
Mariners manager Don Wakamatsu after the game told reporters that Beltre is out indefinitely and may require surgery due to BLEEDING inside his testicle.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Terrifying.
Beltre was “walking stiffly with his legs far apart” before yesterday’s game with the Yankees, which he obviously didn’t participate in.
“[The trainers] don’t want him doing anything, just sitting and resting and icing,” Wakamatsu said, “They say if it’s a major surgery it could be at least a month, maybe more, so there’s a chance of that. … It’s healing already, it’s just a matter of whether they’re going to have to go in and fix it surgically. We’ll know shortly.”
Beltre told reporters in 2008 that he doesn’t wear a protective cup when he plays. “I hear that a lot, that I’m crazy, stupid. [The other players] might be right. There is some stupidity to it.”
And now he has a bleeding testicle. Ow. OW OW OW OW OW OW.
10
Aug
09
Is it Hot in Here or is it Me?
Finland, known for it’s wife-carrying and ice-swimming competitions has, since 1999, held the World Sauna Championships wherein competitors are challenged to stay in a sauna heated to 230 degrees for as long as possible.
Drawing in 150 competitors from over 20 countries, the championship was taken this year by Finland’s own, Timo Kaukonen, who withstood the heat of the sauna for 3 minutes 46 seconds. The second place finisher, Ilkka Poeyhiae lost by 2 seconds. That HAS to burn his ass.
The initial idea for the event came when a group of men frightened other patrons at a Heinola swimming hall when they threw so much water on the sauna’s stove that it became piping hot.
“This is a wrong way to go to sauna, this is not about relaxing, this is competition,” Ossi Arvela, the head of the competition, told reporters.
Now, I’m no parent, but it seems to me that if your then 14 year old kid wasnearly decapitated with what’s called a “Hangman’s injury” from driving a race car, maybe you don’t let your kid GET BACK IN A RACECAR! But then, I’m not the parents of Chris Stewart, a racing fanatic from Hampshire, England.
In September 2006, Stewart, then 12 years old, was driving a 1,000cc Mini go-kart when he crashed head-on into a metal barrier at over 50 mph. The force of the hit was so intense that his head was internally wrenched from the top of his neck. Yikes.
One of only 6 people to ever survive the hangman’s injury, Chris is now stunning his doctors by getting BACK behind the wheel.
Evan Davies, a expert surgeon in spinal injuries conducted the procedure to reattach Stewart’s head to his spine — known as occipital-cervical fusion — by inserting metal plates at the base of the skull and using screws to attach them to the spine. Bone grafts from Stewart’s hips were also used to help strengthen the connection. Ow.
“He’s the only person in the world who has survived such an injury and gone on to lead a normal life,” Davies said, “A few others survived, but they ended up completely paralysed.”
When the accident happened, Stewart’s mother Debbie was standing on the side watching. “I remember seeing his car going straight for the barrier head-on and then crashing. It’s probably every mother’s worst nightmare to see their child in a situation like that.”
It took over 90 minutes for emergency workers to cut Stewart free before he could be rushed to the hopsital. The slightest movement of his head, even a millimeter could have killed the young boy.
“We didn’t know if he’d even survive, walk or talk. So it’s unbelievable he’s back driving again,” said Debbie.
Besides getting to still be alive, Stewart has received quite a bit of attention, understandably so, even getting a chance to be on OPRAH!
Coming off the worst season in the history of the NFL, the Detroit Lions need as many positive things to happen to their team as possible. Unfortunately, it doesn’t look like the team’s fortunes have changed very much. Receiver Bryant Johnson is currently out from training camp and will likely miss several weeks of practice due to an injury. Of course, injuries are a part of football, although, generally they are attained on the practice field or in games, Johnson got his in a slightly different manner; golf cart accident.
With cuts and bruises covering nearly his entire body, “Bryant, unfortunately, had a golf cart accident back in early July,” Lions coach Jim Schwartz said. “It was something we were well aware of. We took a couple of trips down to Atlanta to see him. There are no orthopedic issues with it, a lot of superficial wounds, road rash and those kinds of things. We’ll take our time … with him.”
In speaking with reporters Johnson explained that: “In the community that I live in, everybody uses golf carts to get around. (The golf car) got out of control and it was on two wheels and it fell over. I was driving, and it fell over on my side. It slid about 10 yards. There was a hill, but it wasn’t a steep hill.”
While the cuts are still fresh and could take quite some time to heal, Bryant didn’t think too much about them at the time of the accident.
“It really didn’t hurt until the first time I tried to take a shower,” Johnson said.
I know the feeling, no matter how much I scrub I still can’t ever get clean. I imagine it’s much much worse if you’re a member of the Lions…
31
Jul
09
HEAD! MOVE!
I definitely had this happen to me a couple dozen times as a kid. Of course, you wouldn’t know it talking to me. Bumper cars gogglegoth blopker.
This video never stops being funny to me.
28
Jul
09
Zebras Take Linebacker Out
Confusingly-named Pittsburg State University in Kansas is down a player for next season after sophomore Joe Windscheffel suffered a compound fracture in his forearm that required six pins and a plate. Windscheffel was painting a fence at a farm the other day when he was attacked by some of the livestock and dragged by the arm for some distance until two fellow farm hands were able to free him.
Of course, these weren’t the normal livestock we’re used to hearing about in “Old McDonald,” Windscheffel was working at a zebra farm. Just like a player, Windscheffel claims that the zebra’s attack on him was unprovoked. When he entered the pasture, the 6’2″ 225 lb linebacker/safety had to move the three female and one male zebras out of the way in order get at the fence. Apparently the male took umbrage and launched a teeth baredattack.
Windscheffell is now out for the entire season, which is especially unfortunate considering he red-shirted his entire freshman year due to an Achilles injury, meaning the Pittsburg State Gorillas.
[KCTV]
10
Jul
09
Ooh, Ball in Your Face
In honor of Erin Andrews taking a ball off the face on Wednesday, here’s a gallery assembled by Bula Pictures of other people taking a ball, or foot, or dog to the face. Enjoy!
The Slanch Report 
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