This junior league hockey stud is named Oliver Wahlstrom, he’s 9-years-old and plays in Maine with the Portland Junior Pirates; he’s got serious serious game. At least for one shot.
Sweet!
Archive for the 'Hockey' Category
Montreal Canadiens enforcer Georges Laraque is an imposing gentleman, the rest of the NHL agrees having named him the Best Fighter and Best Enforcer several times. Despite his dangerous presence on the ice, off the ice he’s something of a pussy-cat, for instance, he became a vegan to protest the meat industry. And probably to get girls.
Looks like it worked! Georges appeared in an ad for Octane 7.0 a combo alcoholic/energy drink that sounds likes you’re drinking gasoline. The ad begins with some scantily clad women running and then stretching prior to a street hockey battle against Georges. Now, several women’s groups are upset with Laraque for the (in their opinion) misogynist ad.
The women “don’t even talk. All they’re showing is a certain part of their body. The camera, the eye, is focusing on certain parts of the body,” said Chantal Ismé of CLES, a group that fights sexual exploitation.
“People who know me know I’m not that kind of person,” Laraque said. “That’s not the kind of thing I’d agree to promote.” Laraque said also that he should never have done the ad in the first place when he arrived on set and saw the way the women were dressed. He claims that the only reason he stayed was that the ad would provide substantial donations to the various charities he supports. Talk about turning a situation back on the groups against you, I can’t wait for the various women’s groups to try and continue bashing him after Laraque claims he wasn’t paid and all the money went to charity. Including animal charities. Women find animals adorable. Ergo, Georges Laraque, adorable.
09
Oct
09
Fight Fight Fight!
Want to know why I like hockey? Here’s Patrick Kaleta of the Buffalo Sabres to show you why as he levels the Coyotes’ Petr Prucha who then takes umbrage.
How can you not be into that!?
09
Oct
09
Biting Off More Than He Can Chew
Amidst last night’s Flyers/Penguins game, as the flyers desperately tried to even up the score with 20 seconds left when Mike Richards collided with the Penguins’ goaltender. Kris Letang is a defenseman for the Penguins and so he defended his goalie, grabbing the Flyers’ Scott Hartnell and wrasslin’ him down. During their mini scrum, according to Letang, Hartnell bit him on the ring finger.
Hartnell after the game told reporters that “a lot of stuff happens on the bottom of the pile. He had his hands in my face doing the face wash and we’re rolling around. I can’t say what happened.” Not exactly a denial there…
Last night’s Bruins/Ducks game was the first “Student Night” promotion of the season, one fan in attendance decided to show his displeasure with the Spoked B’s who fell 6-1. This unhappy fan alienated the rest of section 320, who cleared out shortly after a combination of the Ducks taking a 5-1 win and this guy throwing up his combination of nachos and flask liquor.
Go Bruins! The next student “night” will be a day game with the Avalanche on Monday, with plenty of tickets still available.
07
Oct
09
I Will Forgive You
Are there sexier things than this music video? And what ever happened to the stand in one place and dip your arms dance move, that is STYLISH!
They shouldn’t be asking for OUR forgiveness, we should be just be thankful that the Triple Crown Line is in our lives at all. I know I am.
I do just have one question, what was the third guy doing below the boards before he suddenly pops up in the beginning?
02
Oct
09
Can’t Get Enough Fantasy Hockey?
Me either, but I’m doing it anyways! There are limited slots available in the inaugural Slanch Report fantasy hockey league, and we’re looking for YOU!
If you think you have chops or you know anything about hockey you’re already a decent shot to win. We’re drafting MONDAY night, so, you must sign up BEFORE THEN. If you want in, send me an email here and I’ll send you all the relevant information.
If you’ve ever dreamed of being in a fantasy hockey league with a famous blogger, settle for me! If you’ve never played fantasy hockey and/or know nothing about hockey, join us!
Fantasy hockey forever!
Before every sports season some lazy columnist somewhere will write the same tired article; X sport has started and some fans are really into it and don’t pay attention to their loved ones. The Globe and Mail’s Dakshana Bascaramurty churns it out this time, but at least he adds a fun wrinkle, some TMI from a New York couple.
Cori Stern-Torres (not pictured) retires her risqué lingerie and razor from October to April every year and lets her body become “a jungle.”
Her husband of seven years, Jim Traynor (also not pictured), is a rabid New York Rangers fan and she says she’s invisible to him during hockey season.
It’s why Ms. Stern-Torres, 46, relishes commercial breaks: She’s mastered the art of doing the deed in those brief minutes before her hubby’s focus returns to the glow of the TV screen.
But if Ms. Stern-Torres yearns for a longer session between the sheets, she has to share time with 21 hulking men – her husband’s beloved Rangers.
“There were times when we were having sex and he’s been watching the game,” she said from her home in New York. “If I want to get some and there’s a game on, that’s what we have to do.”
Last I checked, commercial breaks are only a few minutes which means that she spends from October until theoretically June being unsatisfied. Well, at least there’s always the summer!
Oh, and if, like me you’re a visual person, thanks to the magic of Google, here are Cori and Jim’s Facebook pages so you can put faces to this sexless couple. Enjoy!
From the folks over at the University of Alaska-Fairbanks comes this video that the hockey team is supposed to come out to, I don’t know about you but I am PSYCHED up now! The UAF Nanooks better straight up DOMINATE the competition, look at how fearsome that polar bear is, he tears the ROOF OFF!
01
Oct
09
Are You Ready For Some Hockey?
Tonight marks the start of the 2009-10 NHL season, not that you’d know it by the lack of coverage everywhere. To celebrate, here are some lovely photos of some of the lovely ladies who work as Ice Girls around the league. Hey, that ice isn’t going to maintain itself!
Check out the full gallery here.
[WFAN]
The Dallas Stars’ Ice Girls know how to promote themselves; hockey may be cold but these ladies are HOT. Skating around in bikinis may not be great for ones health, blood can rush to all the wrong places. Regardless, I think I may become a season-ticket subscriber, and I don’t live anywhere near Dallas.
This video has it all, bikini ice babes, boats, 70s-style porn music, we just need some mustachioed man to enter with a pizza and I will know EXACTLY where this video is going.
Go STARS!
After ESPN stopped airing NHL games they did everything possible to ignore the sport; highlights were few and far between, analysis was non-existent and for most Americans the sport faded from consciousness. Well, hockey is back and making an attempt at a resurgence, the first step was today with the big news from ESPN: starting October 1st ESPN will air over 300 hockey games on its various networks. HOORAY!
The only catch? The games will only be broadcast on the family of ESPN networks residing in EUROPE, primarily in the UK.
Sigh.
Looks like hockey will never get another chance…
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