Posts Tagged ‘Synchronized Swimming

19
Aug
08

Everyone Synchronize Your Watches

I may have gotten suckered by my own dyslexia on a sham synchronized swimming story, but Jenna Randall, 19, of Great Britain is all real, and a tasty morsel for the eyes. She definitely has a Kristin Cavalieri-look about her, but unlike Cavalieri, Randall is actually talented so, there is that one big difference. It is also interesting that at one point, Randall counted Laguna Beach as one of her favorite television shows. When she isn’t in the pool swimming in coordination with others, she’s a student in college in England. I don’t think they do mixed teams in synchronized swimming, but I think she and I are the perfect groundbreaking duo and I’m ready to make history with her. Join us in the gallery below the jump as we get a chance to follow Jenna from birthday cakes to pole dancing.

Of course, for Jenna and all the other fine athletes of the day for these Beijing Olympics, check out this page for lots of fun times.

Continue reading ‘Everyone Synchronize Your Watches’

14
Aug
08

We Don’t Swim in Your Toilet…

Edna Jamanski is a top-line US synchronized swimmer, she started at age 15 and almost immediately became one of the top US athletes in the sport. So, when the Olympic trials were held in February it was widely assumed that she was an easy pick for the team.

“The girls were going through their routine, Chopin’s Ocean Etude Opus 25 No. 12 struggling to rise above the cheering crowd, when all of a sudden the pool started turning a bright, bright red,” Susan Jackson, Jamanski’s mentor said. “I know it’s crazy, but my first thought was Shark attack! How can we work it into the routine? But nope, it was just Edna, executing a flawless spin and pissing in the pool.”

An anti-corrosive, diethyl-ethanolamine, was blamed for the marking effect and, while peeing in the pool does not preclude one necessarily from being on the team, it was apparently enough for the selection committee to opt for someone else to place on the team.

“It was horrible. Everyone started calling me Redna, and no one wanted to swim with me,” Jamanski says. “I eventually had to quit. People can be so cruel, but I’m moving on.”

Now the teenager, who suffers from a hereditary incontinence issue is currently serving as a guest lecturer for the urinary incontinence group Go-Anon, and wants to someday return to the water with her own aquatic version of The Vagina Monologues which sounds like absolute TORTURE for an audience. She’s disappointed to not go to the Olympics certainly, but is taking it in stride saying, “Gold is nice, sure, but it’s so fleeting,” Jamanski advises. “Make your own gold every day, and you won’t go wrong.”

Also, don’t pee in the pool.

[Cap News]




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