Posts Tagged ‘Seattle Seahawks

31
Dec
09

HawksFiend Shows that Fan IS Short for Fanatic

The Seahawks have been in Seattle since 1976, in that time there hasn’t been much to cheer for, until the 2005 season that is when they went to, and lost, the Super Bowl. Bryan Murphy was just another anonymous fan at that point, but ever one to go nuts on a bandwagon, he decided to go all out in his “fanaticism.”

First off was a stop at the local tattoo parlor where he had his left leg from the knee down decorated to honor the 2005 Super Bowl team. The idea came after Murphy had seen an Oakland Raiders fan similar style ink. “There’s no way I’m going to let a Raiders guy have a better tattoo,” Murphy said to himself and away he went.

At the end of the session, the tattoo artist turned to Murphy and said, “Man, you are a fiend for the Seahawks.” The words stayed with Murphy so he did what any other rational person would do; he went to a Halloween costume store, found a mask with two horns which he then painted blue and green. Then he bought some shoulder pads, Freddy Kruegger-style gloves and went on Craigslist where he bought the rights to someone else’s season tickets. HawkFiend was born.

Good thing he didn’t go overboard.

Now Murphy is the president of the Sea Hawkers booster club but it is his alter ego that gets all the publicity. “HawkFiend is the crazed fan,” says Murphy, “HawkFiend’s job is to be there at Qwest with the other 67,000 people and help the team.”

When the Seahawks aren’t playing Murphy is just a normal husband, father of three girls who works at a Costco, but on Sundays everything changes and HawkFiend takes over. He has also added a giant right leg tattoo where the Seahawks are presented as beasts of the NFC West, with the HawkFiend in the middle. Of course, since the team hasn’t done anything SINCE the 2005 season, I wonder if HawkFiend is the jinx…

Don’t worry though, if the Seahawks ever DO get good again, Murphy has a plan on how to “appropriately” honor the team, “I have my whole back for that,” HawkFiend says.

[Seattle Times]

10
Dec
09

Good News for Your Eyesight

After a grand total of 1 game, the Seattle Seahawks are retiring their hideous puke-green uniforms because, as head coach Jim Mora Jr. says, “we didn’t win in them.”

Fans without taste will be devastated.

[ESPN]

24
Nov
09

Gophers Are Dangerous When Cornered

During the halftime of Sunday’s Vikings/Seahawks game there apparently was a fun bit of play with some college mascots taking on some pee-wee football players. Showing that mascots are all class, the Minnesota Golden Gopher stiff-arms, trucks and just runs roughshod over the youths.

02
Apr
09

New Seahawk Uniforms Look Like Bile

Not content with sucking while playing in the easiest division in the NFL and distraught over the retirement of Mike Holmgren, the Seattle Seahawks have plans for a third, alternate jersey. The uniform, tastefully colored in Snot Green should be a big seller amongst kids who want to get beat up by bullies. I’d recommend wearing a Rick Mirer version of this uniform for EXTRA beatdowns. These uniforms are the ultimate combination of fail and suck.

2009greenalts[Green Glare]




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