Posts Tagged ‘Masturbation

16
Oct
09

How Else Could His Right Arm Get So Muscular?

Matthas Schlitte22-year-old German Matthas Schlitte has been arm-wrestling competitively since he was 16 and it only takes one look at him to see that he has dedicated himself to being a top arm-wrestler. That’s because Schlitte’s right forearm is MASSIVE, measuring 18 inches, which is a huge contrast to his left arm, which looks puny and tiny in comparison.

Schlitte’s giant right-arm has been successful leading him to first place finishes in several competitions including the Iron Curtain Armwars in Blackburn and the German Championships in Haltern.

Hmm…started at 16, one forearm DRASTICALLY is bigger than the other, what would a 16-year-old be doing so much that he would increase the muscle mass in just his right arm so much…hmm…there has to be something else besides arm-wrestling that led to this girth.

Oh, wait! I got it! Masturbation! Well-played Matthas, I get it, you didn’t want everyone to know how much you were jerking it so you went all out and happened to be good at arm-wrestling too. Hey, it’s not your fault buddy, you were 16 and feeling as these new and exciting feelings, plus that gust of wind hit you in just the right way and you couldn’t help but abuse yourself. Well, at least you’re putting your special purpose to good use. And they say masturbation won’t get you anywhere…

[Daily Mail]

07
Apr
08

Someone REALLY Liked the Squid and the Whale (UPDATED)

Penn State basketball player Stanley Pringle who thought masturbating in the library would bring him the ladies is denying that that is what he was doing.

Pringle explained simply that he has “a bad habit of putting his hand down his pants. Why would I need to masturbate? This is how I chill, ma’am.”

Among his other good moments in his police interview was when he denied even having been in the library and then “remembered” he had been there and talked with the young lady in question.

According to her, he initially sat down on her study table and asked if she wanted to buy some “hand-lotion” that he was selling for the basketball team. Smooth dude, VERY smooth. Now that’s a line that will easily win the ladies over!

Hearing the sound of flesh slapping against flesh, the lady in question answered her cell phone and went to leave the area and escape him. When she came back he was tying his pants back up and rubbing his hands together like “he had put lotion on them.”

Classy!

03
Apr
08

Someone REALLY Liked The Squid and the Whale

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“I just think Noah Baumbach’s work isn’t being appreciated enough”

Penn State basketball player Stanley Pringle decided to chip out his place in college basketball lore by using the stacks in the library for more than just browsing. Pulling out his classic cylindrical tube while trying to start a conversation with a woman was apparently not the way into her heart. It was however, his entrĂ© to be ridiculed on the internet and become (in)famous. According to the article, this was not the first time that Pringle reportedly has done this, as there was a similar incident with a similar description of said pervert’s actions but as of now Pringle isn’t being charged with distributing his salt and vinegar for that incident.

Thanks to The Big Lead




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