The Slanch Report

Dodgertown is closing after this spring training as you may have heard, and Tommy Lasorda was on hand for the final game. The legendary manager came close to tears, but never took the final plunge. With real manager Joe Torre in China with the rest of the Dodgers, Lasorda has been managing the team that remains, going a robust 1-6.

Too strong a man to cry after seeing 60 years of history end, Tommy does have real emotions, strong men also cry you know.

Here are some of the things that actually have made Tommy Lasorda cry over the years.

• 1981, Rick Sutcliffe had been Rookie of the Year in 1979, now Lasorda left him off the playoffs roster, so Sutcliffe wrecks Tommy’s office, flipping over his desk, breaking chairs, etc. Tommy comes back in, sees his precious glass menagerie destroyed and his gentleman caller gone, bawls for 13 hours straight.
• While at the screening for Ladybugs with Jonathan Brandis, in which he had a bit part, Tommy realizes that there is no way Seaquest DSV will get renewed for a new season. Tear Time: 7 hours

(More after the jump)

• The Phillie Phanatic runs over a Tommy Lasorda jersey several times in a golf cart, still trapped inside the jersey was Mr. Gazoo, Lasorda’s secret weapon. Tear Time: 39.7 hours
  

• At Dodger Stadium a small child comes up and asks for his autograph says simply, “I don’t care what anyone says, I thought Back to School was GENIUS!” Tear time: 5.25 hours
• The Dodgers sign a basically one-dimensional Juan Pierre to a 5 year, $45million contract. Tear time: constant since 11/21/06
• 1993 Tommy finds out that Dodgerdogs are made with 94% leftover meats, O’Malley family refuses his request that they be pure snouts and hoofs. Tear Time: 1 hour
• 2001 All-Star Game, Tommy gets hit by a piece of Vladimir Guerrero’s bat as he’s coaching at 3rd base. Seeing Don Zimmer start to laugh on the opposite bench, Tommy immediately starts sobbing, saying “First he won’t invite me to his birthday party at the Jai Alai club and now this!”