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10
Dec
09

SHOCK! Barry Bonds’ Career is Over!

By slanch 1 Comment
Categories: Baseball and Douches
Tags: , ,

Jeff Borris, the agent for erstwhile San Francisco Giant Barry Bonds is apparently the last one to realize that his client’s career is over. While Bonds is still not officially retired, “It’s two years since he played his last game, and if there was any chance he’d be back in a major-league uniform, it would have happened by now,” Jeff Borris said.

“When 2008 came around, I couldn’t get him a job. When 2009 came around, I couldn’t get him a job. Now, 2010 … I’d say it’s nearly impossible,” Borris said, “It’s an unfortunate ending to a storied career.”

Sure, it’s somewhat unfortunate, but had Bonds been willing to sublimate his ego and accept a far-reduced salary he probably could have caught on with someone in 2008. Because he was unwilling to accept that his very presence causes a whole host of problems for his club, and that those problems translate to less salary for him, Bonds was left without a job. It’s somewhat of a shame, he could probably still walk onto a field today and post up a OPS over .900 and sock 20 HRs in limited service.

That’s the way megalomania goes, I suppose.

[ESPN]

09
Dec
09

If You Hit Me Will I Not Grimace

By slanch 2 Comments
Categories: Baseball
Tags:

We’re still 3 months away from pitchers and catchers reporting, but that doesn’t mean we have to forget about baseball. Let’s take a minute to enjoy the joy of players getting hit by fast-moving balls; sure it hurts, but these pictures capture some of the more awkward looking faces and grimaces these guys make.

[UPI]

08
Dec
09

Gammons is Leaving ESPN

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Baseball, Boston and Television
Tags: , , ,

After 20 years, Peter Gammons has decided to leave ESPN following this week’s Winter Meetings. In a statement he released through ESPN, Gammons said that:

My decision to leave ESPN and move on at this point in my life has been conflicted. I owe a great deal of my professional life to ESPN, having spent more than half of my 40 years in journalism working for the network, and the choice to move on was made with nothing but the strongest feelings for the people with whom I worked. ESPN gave me a great deal more than I gave it, and will always be a huge part of who I am.

First, I have to imagine that ESPN didn’t fire Gammons, because let’s face it, the dude is a legend and should be able to work as long as he wants. So, why is he leaving? Is he still feeling unwell from his stroke a few years ago? Could this be a precursor to a move to MLB Network? If they don’t go after him incredibly hard it’s just foolish.

Regardless, Gammons remains one of the best baseball men out there and from reading his column every Sunday in the Boston Globe to today, he’s always been one of my favorites.

In the meantime, what does this do to ESPN’s baseball coverage, they’ve now lost Gammons and Steve Phillips and I’m guessing Ravech leaves as soon as his contract is up to go to MLB.

[ESPN]

*(UPDATE)*

Gammons is joining BOTH MLB Network and NESN!

08
Dec
09

Yankees Trade for Granderson, Tigers Make Out Well Too

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Baseball
Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

The Curtis Granderson to the Yankees rumors turned out to be true, when just a few hours ago the Tigers, Diamondbacks and Yankees agreed to a three-team 7-player deal. Granderson heads to New York, Detroit gets Arizona starter Max Scherzer and reliever Daniel Schlereth as well as NY’s Phil Coke and OF prospect Austin Jackson. Arizona takes home Edwin Jackson from Detroit and Ian Kennedy from NY.

I LOVE this deal for the Tigers, sure, losing Granderson’s defense and lead-off ability hurts, but considering for his career he has an OPS+ of 50 against lefthanders, it’s not a gigantic loss. The Yankees are going to ultimately need to platoon Granderson with someone who can actually hit lefties sooner rather than later. However, his defense is going to be huge in Yankee stadium, especially if they bring back Damon to play left. Meanwhile, I think Austin Jackson has a decent chance of being nearly as good as Granderson (with less HRs) within a year or two at a significantly cheaper cost. Add in Scherzer’s power arm, Schlereth and Coke upgrading the bullpen and all of sudden the team has fixed one of their biggest weaknesses while replacing two important starters with serviceable replacements.

Me, personally, I’d much rather have Scherzer than Edwin Jackson because he’s younger, has better breaking pitches and has a chance to have better command, unlike Jackson who has yet to string together a full season that matches his talent.

What I don’t understand is what the hell Arizona is doing. They take on Jackson and Kennedy, two pitchers who are OK, but with less potential than Scherzer, plus Jackson is more expensive and has less years of control remaining. What is the plan there? Justin Upton is about to become a monster on the major league level, plus MVP-candidate Mark Reynolds help drive the offense, presumably players like Stephen Drew and Chris Young can’t be as bad as they were last year but the pitching staff still has holes and they just gave up two young power arms, because, you know, those aren’t needed. The NL West is a weak division, I simply don’t get why you make this trade that weakens your team.

Also, now I’m super sad because I always really liked Granderson and now he’s a Yankee…(Incidentally, I won’t be surprised when he records 35 HRs next season in Yankee Stadium.)

[ESPN]

08
Dec
09

Derek Jeter Gets a Girl Fired

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Baseball, Douches and Random
Tags: , ,

Back in town, at least for the moment, Derek Jeter the other night decided to order in some food from one of his favorite restaurants, Nino’s Positano right around the corner from his apartment. After taking the order over the phone, the hostess at the eatery was extremely excited at having spoken with the Yankees captain.

She even convinced the delivery guy to let her go with him on the order; although he made her promise to stay outside the building. When they arrived there though, she grabbed the food and tried to bring it up herself. After trying to charm the doorman and yelling out that she was “Derek’s #1 fan!” the doorman escorted her out of the building, taking the food up to Jeter himself.

When Nino found out about the incident he wasted no time and had the hostess fired. Showing himself a man of the enlightenment, Nino told the NY Post, “I’ll take Jeter over that bimbo any day.”

[NY Post]

07
Dec
09

Castro Wins an Election to Rule Over Baseball

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Baseball
Tags: , , , , ,

In one of the most shocking results in the history of elections, Fidel Castro’s son won a position in the International Baseball Federation. Antonio Castro, 39, is a trained doctor who has accompanied the Cuban baseball team to various tournaments, including the World Baseball Classic and the Cubans’ exhibitions against the Orioles in 1999.

Japan’s Kazuhiro Tawa and Mexico’s Alonso Perez were also elected and Ricardo Fraccari of Italy was chosen as the new president for the IBAF.

Responsible for overseeing all baseball outside the majors, the Cuban Sports Institute released a statement saying that Castro’s election serves as a “vote of confidence in Cuban sports in general and especially in baseball on the island.”

[AP]

04
Dec
09

SHOCK! The Yankees are Giant Douches — Even To Their Own Fans

By slanch 1 Comment
Categories: Baseball and Douches
Tags: , , ,

Proving that just because they are immensely rich and are coming off a World Series victory doesn’t preclude them from being giant douchenozzles, even to their biggest fans, the Yankees have sent a cease and desist letter to the Yankees Universe blog. This is probably the first (and hopefully ONLY) time I have found myself siding with a Yankees fan on ANYTHING, but this is absofuckinglutely ridiculous and shows an arrogance that I didn’t think even the Yankees were capable of. The letter sent to blog states:

While the Yankees are very appreciative of their loyal and highly valued fan support,
unauthorized use of the Yankees Marks that would be confusing or misleading to the public, or
falsely imply some endorsement or sponsorship by the Yankees, cannot be tolerated. Although
the Website purports to be a “blog about Major League Baseball and the New York Yankees,” it
has clearly branded itself throughout with the Yankees Marks, including the Logo. Thus, you are
not using the Yankees Marks in a permissible manner but rather to brand your own online
service, and to create or imply a false impression that the Yankees have approved, condoned or
sponsored the Website.

Your unauthorized uses of the MLB Marks on the Website and in the Domain Name are
likely to cause confusion, mistake and deception as to the existence of an affiliation, connection
or association between your business on the one hand, and MLBAM, and/or other applicable
MLB Entities on the other, and constitute trademark infringement, dilution and unfair
competition in violation of federal and state law.

Accordingly, demand is hereby made that you immediately cease and desist from using
the YANKEE UNIVERSE name and the Logo, any other Yankees Mark and any other MLB
Mark in and as the name of your Website, to promote the Website, to seek advertising any other
commercial opportunities, in and as the Domain Name, and in any other manner that would
cause consumer confusion, dilution of the MLB Marks, or imply any sponsorship or
endorsement of your Website or its contents by any MLB Entity.

Way to go Yankees, this makes great business sense, why not alienate the people who care most passionately (and vociferously) about your team. After all, it was all those bleacher and upper deck seats that were empty all season and the rich guy seats were jam-packed. Oh wait. That’s right, it was the OTHER way around, and instead of courting and appreciating their actual fans the Yankees would, once more, rather cow-tow to the Richie Richs of the world and screw over the little guy. Hey Yankees fans, there’s plenty of room for you in Red Sox Nation, and we always appreciate OUR fans.

Perhaps in a coincidence, but I say not, the Yankees have dug up the corpse of George Steinbrenner and propped him up to appear at the team’s organizational meetings the last few days. Just saying, this is EXACTLY what a zombie corpse would want done…

The Yankees should be absolutely ASHAMED with themselves. Of course, their arrogance probably precludes them from feeling human emotions.

[The Yankees Universe via The Big Lead]

04
Dec
09

Norman Rockwell — Destroyer of the Chicago Cubs

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Awesome and Baseball
Tags: , , , , ,

It’s long been believed in Chicago that the Cubs streak of futility was caused when a man wasn’t allowed to bring his lucky goat into the stadium during the 1945 World Series but perhaps the source of all the team’s failures is someone else, famed illustrator Norman Rockwell.

In an iconic 1948 painting entitled, “The Dugout,” Rockwell painted a forlorn Cubs batboy resigned to yet another failure, in the background are slumped over Cubs players and managers and over them are jeering, disappointed fans. Not a pretty picture. A study for the final piece (that’s housed down the street from where I live at the Brooklyn Museum) was recently sold to a private collector for $662,500. The original picture was the cover for a 1948 Saturday Evening Post and was done in Boston prior to a Boston Braves/Cubs game; in fact the batboy isn’t a member of the Cubs but was the visiting team’s assigned batboy and actually a Boston native.

Scott Simon, an NPR host and Chicago native, has a print of “The Dugout” hanging in his office: “The fact that this painting was on the cover of the most popular magazine in America at the time, and had been painted by the most popular illustrator at the time, cemented in people’s minds the image of the Cubs as losers. Of course, they did everything possible to live up to that image. But after that picture, we no longer talked about a team that won nine pennants but about lovable losers.”

After the Cubs posed for the picture the lost both ends of a doubleheader, their catcher (who is directly behind the batboy) was beaned in the head. On the day the cover was published, Sept. 4,1948, the Cubs lost 6-0 to the Brooklyn Dodgers; All Star pitcher Johnny Schmitz who stands to the right of the batboy gave up 5 runs in 3 innings during that game.

[Chicago Tribune]

02
Dec
09

Beware the Mighty FLYING SQUIRRELS!

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Awesome and Baseball
Tags: , , ,

The AA affiliate of the San Francisco Giants have recently changed their name via a fan contest and are now going to be playing as the Richmond Flying Squirrels. Sure it’s not a particularly imposing sounding name, but this is baseball, are people really intimidated by the Rockies name? Or the Red Sox? Or Dodgers?

While they may not have a commanding name, the Flying Squirrels do have a totally kick-ass new logo on their side.

“We feel real good about what we came up with,” said Flying Squirrels vice president Todd Parnell. “It’s kid-friendly, but has a little bit of an edge to it. Today was important because it gave us an identity. A team without a logo is like a blind date, where you know the person’s name going in but don’t know what they look like.”

[MiLB via Rob Neyer]

02
Dec
09

Sinners Steal From the Saints

By slanch 1 Comment
Categories: Baseball
Tags: , ,

All the talk that the economy is improving is nice and all, but out in the heartland times are still hard. For instance, the St. Paul Saints, one of the foremost independent baseball teams have been the victims of an unfortunate theft; Sunday night thieves stole several hundred feet of copper wire out of the Saints’ home, Midway Stadium.

After getting through the back fence, the thieves came in and opened 8 electrical boxes, nabbing the copper wiring within. They also stole the copper wiring from the scoreboard and the pipes that run along the outfield wall. Even more horrendous, they disabled the connections for the hot tub!!!!

Brad Meyer from St. Paul Parks and Recreation said, “The act itself was really quite dangerous. and, in our eyes, quite shameful.” The cost to repair the stadium is expected to be nearly $10,000.

Sunday’s crime was the second copper theft in two years at Midway Stadium.

02
Dec
09

The Phillies Ball Girls Need Your Help!

By slanch Leave a Comment
Categories: Awesome and Baseball
Tags: ,

The Philadelphia Phillies need our help, after wading through thousands of applications the Phillies ball girl staff is nearly finalized, just one spot remains. In order to pick the suitably appropriate woman for the job the Phillies have done the only reasonable thing, open the decision up to the public.

The 5 lovely ladies up for the job all seem like fine candidates, each with their own qualifications and special qualities. Me personally, I’m voting for Amandah (first from left) from Temple University, but hey, to each his own.

The Phillies site has video interviews with each woman, giving them the chance to espouse why they are the most qualified for the job, and I recommend being an informed voter and going through each of the clips. Make sure you vote and help make one lucky woman’s life immeasurably better by giving her the chance to be on the field with the Phillies.

[Phillies]

01
Dec
09

There Ain’t Nothing Pedroia Can’t Do

By slanch 1 Comment
Categories: Awesome, Baseball and Boston
Tags: ,

Peter Gammons spoke with Dustin Pedroia recently and his most recent comments only endear him to me more. After mentioning that the Red Sox had approached Pedroia regarding whether he thinks he could play shortstop he had nothing but confidence.

“When the idea of moving back to shortstop was floated to me, I welcomed it,” Pedroia says. “I’m excited. Tell Derek [Jeter] to enjoy the gold glove and silver slugger awards while he can. Obviously, I’m not serious about the fun I have with Derek, but I’m never stopping believing in the goal. I believe I can play shortstop and help get the Red Sox back where they belong.”

Goddamn I love that cocky son-of-a-bitch.

[ESPN]

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