The English Premier League is considered one of the, if not the, absolute best soccer leagues in the world. Owning one of the EPL teams is a huge bragging right for the super-rich, people like Malcolm Glazier (owner of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers) and future Bond villain, Roman Abramovich belong to the club. Now, the Newcastle United club is on the market and it appears that a sale is imminent.
According to a report from UPI, Newcastle owner Mike Ashley is very close to selling the club for $600 million to an very successful construction family from the Middle East, the name of the prospective owners? Bin Laden.
Of course, Osama isn’t the one buying the team, his family “disavowed” him years ago.
Sure the Guardian newspaper doesn’t believe that the sale will go through, but what do they know? And besides, that don’t mean I can’t shamelessly speculate.
I hope it doesn’t go through, I really like drinking delicious Newcastles and wouldn’t want to be supporting terrorists every time I had one…
However, I would love to see the newspaper headlines after every game. “The Terrorists win!” “Manchester Gets Bombed by Newcastle” “Newcastle Explodes for 3 Goals!” etc etc, the possibilities are endless!
The Slanch Report 
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