The Slanch Report

I don’t know why, but the idea of a coach-in-waiting to me is somewhat creepy. Jim Mora in Seattle, Jim Caldwell in Indianapolis and Jason Garrett in Dallas are all head coaches in waiting in the NFL, and to me, it seems like the nature of the job would lead to problems. Say for example, hypothetically a team like the Cowboys is struggling and their head coach looks over matched, at what point does the head coach lose all credibility and instead players and media start paying attention only to what the coach-in-waiting is saying or doing. After all, he’s going to be the big guy soon enough. I’m not the only one thinking this way either.

Anyways, the University of Texas yesterday announced that defensive coordinator Will Muschamp is the successor to head coach Mack Brown, who has made no announcement that he is expected to retire anytime soon. All my worries about the distraction such a coach-in-waiting could cause though were proved completely fair when I saw this photo of Muschamp on the sidelines. How can Mack Brown compete against a defensive coordinator that can LEVITATE!?! That’s some David Blaine shit right there and we all know he’s a scumbag, so now Mack has to deal with a coach-in-waiting, who everyday is probably waiting for something awful to befall him, AND someone who has studied with David Blaine. This cannot turn out well.
Watch your back Mack.